I have no idea if Tumblr makes the age of blogs available or not. But I first created this account with the name Artsoccer when I was in middle school, and then promptly failed to figure out how to log in, and did literally nothing with this account (I think I kept clicking the create new account button and it kept telling me my email was already in use, I was child and therefore not smart). But now, probably more than a decade later, post college and everything, I decided that I wanted to try this again.
I’m probably going to be mostly using this as a dumping ground for weird thoughts I want to share, but feel weird about posting in the group chat I have with my friends, writing stuff, and fandom stuff (mostly House of Anubis).
I live in the United States, but one of the good states where women get more rights than guns. I love chocolate. I’m going to be cursing on this blog, almost certainly. I believe that people deserve human rights just by virtue of being alive. And between that and my description, I think you know everything you need to know about me.
GLaDOS voice: "Would you like to see some artwork I generated? I've heard from other test subjects that AI-generated artwork produces an uncanny valley response in human viewers because they can't perceive it as fully real. They've told me that it looks absolutely hideous to them, that they can't imagine anything more disgusting than AI art. But, well I've been practicing and wanted your honest opinion. Feel free to let me know how ugly you find this by ranking it on a scale from 'vomit-inducing' to 'eye-bleeding'."
A robotic arm lowers from the ceiling holding a hand mirror up to Chell's face
Cellulose nitrate was used to make dice from the late 1860s until the middle of the twentieth century, and the material remains stable for decades. Then, in a flash, they can dramatically decompose. Nitric acid is released in a process called outgassing. The dice cleave, crumble, and then implode.
From Dice: Deception, Fate & Rotten Luck by Ricky Jay and Rosamond Purcell, 2002.
Fun fact: due to the ongoing financial support from the people of tumblr, critically endangered pygmy raccoons being rehabbed in Cozumel are now able to get vaccines for deadly diseases like distemper and rabies before they are released.
Yeah so tumblr has actually raised thousands of dollars for direct conservation actions to conserve the critically endangered pygmy raccoon. Some things funded include:
Necropsies
Veterinary care and lab tests for sick animals
Food for animals in rehab
Gas money to go rescue animals in trouble after hours when my partner doesn’t have access to the work van
A small plot of land to start building outdoor rehab enclosures on and potentially house long term residents
i reckon they did actually manage to go on 1 date after the school year ended and before nina went back to america. being the nerds they are, fabian took her to the world museum in liverpool for their date.
the aquarium
“this is so fun! i haven’t been to the aquarium since i was a little kid!” nina squealed.
fabian smiled. “well, i’m glad you’re enjoying. no one else in the house seems to enjoy looking at fish all day, so i haven’t been in a while either.” he was right. a few years ago their year group went on a trip to this same museum, and fabian found himself alone in the aquarium after a few minutes. everyone was more interested in seeing the dinosaur bones than anything. fabian was excited to see them too, but there was just something so captivating about watching sea creatures glide through the fluorescent blue tanks.
nina giggled at that. “oh! what’s this?” she gawked, pointing at a little pink creature swimming in the tank in front of her. “axel… axolotl?” she said, skeptically. “i’ve never heard of that before.”
“yeah, they’re super cool actually!” fabian replied. “they’re able to regenerate parts of of their bodies, like limbs and parts of their brain, so studying their biology is really… um, it’s really…” fabian trailed off. his train of thought derailed as he noticed nina gazing into the tank in front of them. the colourful lights twinkling in her eyes with the soft ripples of the water dancing across her face made her look absolutely majestic, and fabian couldn’t help but stop and stare. ‘she is so pretty’ fabian thought to himself.
“really what?” nina questioned, noticing how he’d cut his sentence short.
“sorry, um, yeah. really interesting, is what i meant to say. scientists think they may have major implications in human medicine. brain repair, organ regrowth, tumour resistance, stuff like that.”
nina listened intently. partially because she wanted to learn more about axolotls, but mainly because she liked the sound of fabian’s voice.
“sometimes i forget that i’m dating a bookworm” nina joked while she linked her arm with his. the couple laughed as they continued through the aquarium into the next room.
—————————————————————————
Ancient Egypt gallery
“okay, this is more like it!” nina gasped. fabian could tell just how excited she was by the way she gripped his hand and dragged him across the ancient egypt collection room.
“i thought you might like this room the most,” fabian chuckled, “and we might find out more about you and the frobisher smythes.”
nina’s face twisted. “fabian, we just spent the whole year in those dusty tunnels under the house. right now, i don’t want to know anything about anything that could potentially get us cursed again” nina ranted, sarcastically.
“okay okay, fair enough” fabian responded. “although to be fair, a lot of the artefacts in here were probably discovered by robert and his team.”
just as he said that, the couple were found face to face with a glass case, holding a wall fragment depicting tutankhamun taking part in a festival.
“ugh, you jinxed me!” nina exclaimed with an eye roll. “it is still pretty interesting, though” she admitted, as they read over the plaque explaining how robert and his team found the boy king’s tomb in 1922. it even went on to describe how the frobisher smythes were accused of stealing artefacts from his tomb to smuggle back to britain, alongside a picture of the team of archaeologists. nina moved on to the next glass cabinet displaying other objects, while fabian stayed put, his eyes fixed on the image.
he recognised robert and louisa instantly, smiling triumphantly in the middle of the photograph. he didn’t recognise the other members of the expedition team, but he couldn’t shake the feeling that he had seen them before. the man standing next to robert was tall, impeccably dressed, and had fluffy blond hair. he’s sure he’d seen that hairstyle before. and the lady stood next to louisa was of similar height to her, maybe a bit shorter. she had tan skin, dark hair, and a bright smile. he stood there, staring at the image for a few moments longer, before the realisation hit him like a slap in the face. they were spitting images of…
‘jerome?’ he whispered to himself, utterly confused. ‘and… joy?’
“what was that?” nina glanced up from the ancient jewellery she was inspecting when she heard fabian’s faint voice beside her.
“oh… nothing” fabian muttered. perhaps it was just a coincidence, he thought to himself. and if jerome and joy had connections to the frobisher smythes and tutankhamun’s tomb, surely he would know it, right? he shrugged the uneasy feeling off of him, before heading over to the display nina was grinning at. today was not about robert or whatever potential mystery that still lay hidden beneath the grounds of anubis. no, today was about nina.
“look how gorgeous these are!” nina said, while pointing to a set of gold necklaces encrusted with different precious jewels and metals. “amber would go crazy for these” nina giggled.
“oh, she definitely would!” fabian agreed.
they then wandered through to the mummy room, safely tucked to the side of the gallery. they were greeted with dozens of sarcophagi, mummies, and funerary objects. but, what caught fabian’s eye was the long glass cabinet housing a long papyrus scroll, labelled ‘the book of the dead of djedhor’.
“wow” fabian gawked. “this is the longest intact scroll i’ve ever seen.”
“it’s beautiful” nina added, “i wonder what it says. i wish we could read it.”
“well, this plaque says that the full text has never been published or fully translated.” fabian told her, regrettably. “but, if i were to guess, it’s probably filled with spells, prayers, and rituals, to guide one’s soul safely into the afterlife.” he studied the illustrations carefully etched into the scroll. he recognised the scene where djedhor’s heart was weighed against maat’s feather, overseen by anubis and horus.
“oh, never mind then” nina replied with a shrug, although fabian could tell she was a bit disappointed. he would never understand how difficult nina’s life had been, with her parents passing at a young age and carrying the responsibility of ‘the chosen one’ as a teenager. the only explanation for being the chosen one was her birthdate, but surely there was more to it than that? if there was any more information on the importance of the chosen one or the osirian, it was probably written on a papyrus scroll somewhere. perhaps in this very museum, lost in translation. or buried beneath the sands of egypt, crumbling into dust as time slips away from them. either way, nina had been carrying the world on her shoulders for the past two years, and fabian would be damned if he let anyone put her in danger.
“plus,” nina added, after a short pause. “i probably shouldn’t read any egyptian spells out loud anyways. who knows? i’d probably just resurrect an evil spirit that tries to take over the world or something” nina joked.
fabian laughed at that, as he intertwined her hand with his and started leading her out of the small room. there was no way that would ever happen! it’s just not physically possible… right?
as they made their way to the exit, they stopped at one more big display they had skipped over the first time.
“oh my gosh, this is huge!” nina gushed at the granite sarcophagus for a man called bakenkhonsu. “he must have been super important.”
fabian started reading the plaque beside the case. “it says he was a high priest of amun during the reign of pharaoh ramesses II. he was responsible for several building projects, including the eastern temple in the karnak temple complex.”
“amun?” nina questioned. “as in the king of the gods?”
“looks like it!” fabian continued reading. “says high priests were in charge of performing sacred rituals, managing temple estates, and other political matters. bakenkhonsu was especially important as he had been blessed by amun himself. it is said that he was gifted with supernatural powers that allowed him to summon and exorcise gods and spirits from the spiritual realm to the mortal realm. unfortunately, his mummy went missing after the initial excavation.”
the information settled in nina’s chest like dust on the old books at the frobisher library. the high priest of amun — the king of gods and the god behind their school’s name — was able to resurrect and banish gods and spirits. and his body was missing. not misplaced, not undiscovered, missing. nina shuddered. was he the one who resurrected senkhara? and where was his body now?
suddenly, her locket started glowing.
“um, nina? your locket’s glowing?” fabian stated.
nina looked down and quickly tucked her locket under her shirt. whoever this person was, and whatever he did, nina was nowhere near ready to discover the part he played in her oh-so-complicated life.
“let’s get out of here. right now.” nina said, hurriedly, as she pulled fabian out of the gallery and towards their next room.
—————————————————————————
the planetarium
“are you sure you’re alright?” fabian asked, his eyes full of worry as he looked at nina, who had only stopped trembling when they sat in their plush seats under the unlit dome.
“i’m fine, i promise. i just… don’t want to think about being the chosen one right now. we just finished one quest, and i’m not about to dive headfirst into another.” nina slumped forward, leaning her elbows on her knees as she balanced her head in her hands, which allowed fabian curl his arm around her shoulders and bring her head towards him.
“i get it,” fabian said lovingly. “you’ve had a tough year, we all have. so just relax and enjoy the show, yeah?” he whispered, placing a kiss atop her head as the lights dimmed and the dome above them lit up.
fabian had chosen this show called ‘from earth to the universe’. he was looking forward to diving deep into the history of the galaxy, our solar system, the stars we gaze upon, and the planets we’re surrounded by. but, despite the floating lights and marching colours that shimmer and spark above his head, his attention was set on the stunning girl beside him.
she had no idea he was starting at her. her eyes were following the moving pictures above her, as she smiled in awe of the beauty of the cosmos.
if only she could see the beauty that sits before fabian.
as his gaze lingered on nina’s shining eyes and radiant smile, he decided this is it. this is what love feels like. it’s not painful, or avoidant. it’s not tiring, or even difficult. it’s peaceful, like the quiet of the library after opening hours. it’s golden, like the glow of our sun being shown on the screen above me, or the tears wept by the mask of anubis. it’s absolutely beautiful, just like nina.
fabian would never know what he missed from the show during those minutes he spent admiring nina. but, he didn’t care. he found the universe breathtaking, but it still had nothing on nina.
—————————————————————————
anubis house
“listen, i got you something” nina admitted sheepishly, as the pair sat on her bed. amber was still downstairs clearing up after dinner, so the two were left alone for the time being.
“aw nina, you didn’t have to do that.” fabian blushed as nina handed him a small wrapped box.
“it’s nothing really, i just thought you might like it.”
fabian carefully unwrapped the box to unveil the watch box hidden beneath. he opened the box and gasped excitedly. it wasn’t just any watch, it was a brand new calculator watch.
“i love it! thank you, thank you, thank you!” fabian repeated over and over again, as he enveloped nina into a bone crushing hug.
“it’s no big deal, honestly. i just know how disappointed you were when alfie broke yours, so i thought i’d get you a new one.”
fabian had never been so infatuated with a girl in his life. he leaned back slightly as the pair looked into each other’s eyes. he thought back to the events of the day, and of the past two years. the way she’d walked right into his heart as if she already owned it and intertwined herself in his soul like she was stuck in the spider maze. the way he remembered every fleck and colour in her eyes. the way her glossy lips looked so inviting. he couldn’t take it anymore. it had been a long time coming.
“i love you, nina” he finally admitted.
nina’s cheeks flushed instantly. she knew fabian loved her, and she even knew that she loved him. but to hear it out loud, especially coming from him, made her feel like she could handle any quest or curse life threw at her, as long as she had fabian to hold her hand while she conquered it.
“i love you too, fabian.”
please note that some of the stuff i’ve written about the museum and the artefacts are inaccurate! i’ve never seen the museum in real life, and i made up some stuff about the egyptian collection to make the story more interesting lol.
So! This is a perfect case study in situations where you should be wary of misinformation.
Take a moment and ask yourself, a project like this requires a lot of time, money and dedication of resources, why would scientists dedicate that time to something that could just be done by a tree?
The answer is they wouldn't. So that means this claim requires further investigation!
This project is called LIQUID 3, and it's not meant for cities with wide open spaces, it's meant for cities like Belgrade in Serbia. These cities are densely populated and heavily polluted, to the point where pollution actually chokes out current trees and makes creating green spaces difficult.
Liquid 3 was a PhD scientists answer to these problems. The microalgae tank is intended for spaces where you either:
Don't have enough space to plant full trees, or
Don't have enough time to plant trees and wait for them to grow up.
The tank is extremely efficient when you consider the amount of space needed compared to the amount of CO2 turned into oxygen. The tank can operate throughout the winter. And most importantly, it can be quickly set up in areas that desperately need relief from air pollution NOW not in 10 years when trees are done growing. Children currently suffocating on polluted air can't wait for trees to grow, they need to be taken care of now, and Liquid 3 is one of the ways to take care of them. Depending on the species of microalgea used, a number have shown a pretty amazing capacity to pull heavy metals out of the air which is something trees can get choked up by.
The tanks aren't just tanks either! Liquid 3 have solar panels placed on top, they have lighting and mobile phone charging, and they work as public benches. The designers of it want to encourage green spaces where there's room, but where there isn't room or time, Liquid 3 can step in. Realistically, this isn't a replacement for trees. It's replacing boring metal city benches with new, cooler benches that also clean the air (and have at least some heating during the winter).
Not only that, but the microalgea that grows is native to Serbia and all that microalgea has a ton of great uses! It makes for great fertilizer, compost, wastewater treatment, cleaner biofuels and even for helping create new tanks for further air purification. They only require a quick algae divide once a month, and the produced algae can be carted off to where ever it's needed. This makes them effective solutions for areas that can't sustain complex installations.
So yeah, there's actually quite a lot of places that would like these. Lots of people currently breathing in terrible quality air would much rather have their boring city benches replaced with really fucking cool algae tanks that clean the air and can be used to help create + sustain future green spaces in cities. I dunno about you, but I'd take that over a dumb metal bench any day. Put these at every bus stop and I'd be delighted.
okay so, guy at work, who i find out afterwards is famous at this place for being a sex pest, comes up and starts with what i also learn is his favorite opener to conversations where he’s going to be a sex pest, namely: “Do you know where the term ‘blow job’ comes from?”
and here he made his first fatal error. his moment of hubristic sex pesting. because of course i know where the term blow job comes from, i love learning about sex and the history of sexual terms! i know so much about oral sex that i could write a book on it!
his second error: approaching a little autistic freak with what he intended to be an uncomfortable sex question that would make me feel weird and gross. Friends, Romans, Countrymen, I Have Never Misjudged A Man’s Intentions So Incredibly In My Life. because i did not realize he was trying to harass me. because i love talking about sex facts, albeit not usually at work. unless. someone prompts me. my coworkers are the kind of people who are generally online enough to know terms, but not exactly what they mean, and they realized they could ask me a while back and get good answers without the resulting awkwardness because i do not experience shame. i am primed to answer questions like the one he has proposed.
So I Answered It.
and well, really, what happened is that I began answering it, then realized the answer required a bit more context. I mean, you can’t just say “oh, well, the term first appears in writing in the 1940s” without first explaining that ‘blow’ by itself already had sexual connotations for centuries, and then, really, are we talking about the origin of the term or the origin of the act. and well we have a ton of literature and art depicting fellatio throughout human history, did you know a lot of it was men performing it on other men? oh, that reminds me, there are a multitude of latin words for oral sex performed on penises, and hold on let me quote you the entirety of catullus 16 from memory and explain it’s fascinating insights into the roman world of homosexuality-
i do not know how to turn any of this ^ off, by the way. i’m sure some people out there have a switch that disables their infodumping mid-speech. i do not. and i also didn’t realize he wasn’t looking for a real answer until my other coworker explained so hours later. he could not excuse himself from the conversation he started, and i made a conservative man at least 30 years older than me to listen to my catullus recitation. i will sodomize and facefuck you, indeed.
anyway, i think i got a bad grade in being sexually harassed. my pro tip is maybe don’t start with what a very autistic individual will misconstrue as you earnestly asking them to explain sex to you. the special interest shield will cause splashback damage.
