#lance hate

[imhereformysciencefriends]

still that ask meme, bc i thought of the meanest thing: lance? :3c

Sexuality: could not be more obviously heterosexual and I mean that in both the “He is an individual who is attracted exclusively to women” and also in a “He is a Straight™” wayGender: painfully cisA ship: it is only in very, very, very recent seasons that he’s actually started to delicately sip at his respecting women juice so maybe we’ll see if he ever manages to take a full swallow and if he meets any nice girls after that. As of right now, there is no one who 1. Shows any interest in him 2. He shows interest in AND 3. Is present ONLY after his shift in character. I literally cannot ship him with anyone he met prior to the shift, as their opinion of him either is or should be colored by their knowledge of how he treats women as a monolith for his purposes and not as individuals A BROTP: The Garrison trio of Big Nerds is cute even I can’t deny thatA NOTP: BITCH YOU KNOW. Okay but seriously I have kl@nce sh@nce h@nce pl@nce @llur@nce and as soon as I figure out what his ship name with Romelle is, I’ll have that blacklisted. It’s all blacklisted. All of it. Random hc: would be really fun as a character if he just drank his respecting women juice. Not a hc but a fact. General opinion: like i would find myself genuinely enjoying his humor and warming up to his character but INEVITABLY and I do mean EVERY DAMN TIME I started warmin up to him he’d ruin it by being a filthy fuckin womanizer and at this point I’ve just given up Lance Sucks

[roast-beast]

Characters that would make a better Blue Paladin than Lance.

-Allura

-Coran

-Rover

-That one Arusian warrior from episode 3

-The space mice stacked on top of each other in a trenchcoat

-Shay

-Keith’s Texan accent

-Nyma (the Blue Lion even let her pilot it after she stole it from Lance)

-Kaltenecker

[imhereformysciencefriends]

Okay not to be bitter petty and salty but

Why would you ever ship Allura with L-nc- when Hunk is quite literally right there

[imhereformysciencefriends]

Hierarchy of klance discourse

shit discourse: klance is bad because Lance is abusive

okay discourse: klance is bad because many of Lance's insecurities revolve around Keith, and while that isn't Keith's fault it would still result in competition and infighting that would be unhealthy for the two of them

good discourse: klance is bad because it's an overdone, boring dynamic that is seen over and over again

advanced discourse: klance is bad because Lance is a wholly antagonistic and disrespectful character who has fostered an air of needless competition and excessive mutual dislike between the two of them. He is so obsessed with his own image that he repeatedly and intentionally disrespects Allura with continued empty flirtations, gives every other female-coded alien similar treatment, and has selected Keith as his "rival" purely because Keith was a good pilot and Lance feels that he has to have a male counterpart to fight with and show off to "the ladies" by defeating. The number of positive interactions between the two in canon are minimal at best, and klance shippers overlook the very real enmity between the two in favor of shipping the two lithe, conventionally attractive teenage boys together in an entirely out of character manner that makes the two of them sweet and sappy with each other with overwhelming frequency. Also, this "twinkshipping" that happens is a product of yaoi subculture, fetishizing mlm relations between two characters that girls and women in fandom themselves find sexually appealing. It is an unrealistic relationship dynamic based in the arousal of the viewer and nothing grounded in canon.

expert tier: klance is bad because Lance is very clearly the annoying Straight™ friend

god tier: klance is bad because Hunk isn't in it

[imhereformysciencefriends]

Just saw a post sayin that someone on the VT crew said /ance is going to die and I am POPPIN. BOTTLES. 🍾🍾🍾

[imhereformysciencefriends]

AU where l.ance doesn't exist and Allu.ra's had the blue lion from the beginning and also Literally Everyone is dating each other because all ships are good ships except the ones including fuckboy mc doesntknowhowtorespectwomen

[imhereformysciencefriends]

So uh, based on this post. Dedicated to me (myself) and a boy who has never touched a drop of respecting women juice in his life (Lance)

[zefive]

i finished watching ep1 of Voltron, and god damn, i’ve forgotten a) how much i LOVE HUNK. i would DIE FOR HIM. b) how baaaad Lance is in ep1. i. legit cannot stand him, the only okay moment with him is like, the one where he fucking farts in the cockpit bc that’s so juvenile

also my brain is immediately spewing out sad aus. like. au where Hunk doesn’t get to the yellow lion in time, and Lance dies :)