202. Do You Prefer My Deodorant Or My Pheromones?
You’re walking in the cold and you feel someone behind you, so you turn around. You face forward again saying “Oh my God” a million times, under your breath. She is beautiful but it’s the “kind of beautiful that she is” that is making you crazy. You want to turn around again but you don’t want to be too obvious so you just slow your pace, praying that she’ll catch up. You’re almost at a corner and you hope the light turns red. It does. “I like your jacket.” You both love sushi so you share a Tiger roll because she’s not that hungry anyways. She wants to know everything about you. The sake makes conversation easy and she ends up doing all the talking. You’re a good listener. She takes a picture of you with her little digital camera while you are in mid-bite and you’re sure you look like shit in the photo, but she won’t even show it to you. Instead, she goes into a long philosophy to explain the reason why she won’t. You’re walking in the cold, and since you don’t, she invites herself over and suggests that you guys watch the entire Stanley Kubrick collection that’s sitting on top of your fridge. She says it’ll be like a John and Yoko love-in. She’s in her bra and her underwear now, completely at ease. You’re the one that’s uncomfortable, so you make some Green Tea. She comes behind you and she starts to kiss you. You’re on the floor. The kettle is whistling. She tells you that she can’t fuck you because it’s too soon, but you can cum on her face… if you want. You wake up the next morning and you panic because you think a bug is on your chest but it’s just one of her fake lashes. She’s still sleeping with her warm body wrapped into yours. She smells like vanilla, and her skin is spotless. You’re only thinking about that because the last girl had all the pimples on her back. Music starts playing. It’s her phone… an R-Kelly ringtone. It’s already in her hand because she sleeps that way, and she turns it off without opening her eyes. She says “Bonjour”. Then she says… “So, you like my jacket?” (via lastnightsparty)