LIAM DUNBAR APPRECIATION ONE SHOT
---This post is in regards to a prompt I saw from @liamdunbarappreciation and it has to do with his anger, emotions and it ties to season 4 with the final coffin of his IED amplified by his werewolf status. Enjoy---
Liam, or rather, the kid with explosive anger, is what many would say. He never could explain his pure rage. He never could tell why he would have these intense episodes of anger, especially when he is provoked. He could never make those around him believe what he did was an accident, or something he didn't mean to do. But sadly, those around him would never believe him or his words, they would all direct it at his anger issues.
The very same anger issues he could not control when they occurred. That wasn't the only thing he couldn't control. He couldn't control his emotions as well. The days he would snap when he was provoked, he would feel immense guilt and melancholy about his actions after calming down. Unfortunately the damage he created would have been done and too late to fix. Leaving him to wallow in guilt, shame, and sadness.
He hated when someone tells him to calm down. He absolutely hated it. It only made his anger worse and that would skyrocket to great heights, which would cause more damage done by him.
"How does it happen? When you get angry and start to snap?" His best friend since childhood, Mason asks. He's the only friend and person who never judged him or was scared of him because of his anger issues.
"It's like…I see red. Pure red. Plus this intense and violent side of me that just wants to punch, scream and break things. Like there's no other image and because of that I let my anger get the best of me and I just let loose."
It's all Liam could describe because that's what he sees, and what he feels. And then after whatever damage he's done, he becomes riddled with shame and regret of his vicious actions.
He was never born with this extreme anger issue of his. In fact he never remembered having it alot, not until he started 4th grade and when his mom finally left the rotten, abusive bastard that was his father. That's when he started to feel these huge outbursts of anger and rage that cursed him.
He blames the horrible trauma his bastard of a father caused for him and his mom. He blames him for giving him these fiery anger issues he can't control.
His venom laced words when he says with anger, he doesn't mean to say, but it comes out before he can stop himself. And these poisonous, raged induced words hurt the feelings of those he cares for. From his best friend, to his mom and stepdad; who was a doctor and willing to help him manage his anger.
But it's the regret and hurt he feels when he verbally hurts his loved ones that he wishes he never had this problem.
Sometimes he thinks it's okay that if his mom should hate him, his stepdad should hate him. Even his best friend should hate him. But they don't hate him. They care and love him too much that they don't hate him and he can't seem to understand why would they still want to be with a lunatic, or a boy with volatile emotions. But it got worse. His anger…got worse.
He had 2-3 fights in a school year, due to someone always provoking him or bullying him which led to violent and drastic actions, leading to suspensions, expelled, and going to different schools.
6th grade…were one of his biggest regrets. He was provoked and insulted, and he was seeing red. What made him snap at the asshole was when they made homophobic slurs to Mason and that's when he punched the son of a bitch's mouth, seeing vermillion. Fists flying and blinded by his anger, he failed to register his surroundings until a fist made a sickening crack and the cry of a girl made him froze. But a fist came back at him and punched his nose, feeling a painful crack. His anger subsided to see a girl with Latina features enraged with a bloody fist out.
This, along with the boy he fought who was worse off with multiple bruises and cuts, led to Liam getting suspended. He was waiting for his mom and step-dad to berate him, hell even hit him since his dad did it.
But his stepdad did not hit him. Instead they did the opposite. His mom and stepdad agreed to help him. With the latter's methods. He thought of helping him in activities that would benefit his anger so long as it doesn't hurt no one and can help maintain that vicious anger, compared to the punch indents he would see in Liam's room.
His stepdad helps him with his anger issues, something that shocks him because no one has ever helped him with this. And Mason can only do so much to help, but he can't fault him for that.
His stepdad gets him into lacrosse. And that's when everything changes for the better…at least then.
Rather than punching walls, breaking things and hurting his fists, he would take his anger and energy into lacrosse and began honing his skills and strikes with his lacrosse stick and ball. The more he did it, the more it helped his anger and emotions. He even scored all of his shots in the net, which somehow made his anger subside.
Guess he was just that good
But unfortunately, all good things come to an end.
His coach at Devenford Prep benched him for an entire season of lacrosse. All because of several red cards he received in playing lacrosse. This left him in a boiling, uncontrollable rage that he blanked out from and he did the unthinkable.
He destroyed his coach's car. No, not by throwing rocks at it and or popping tires. He used a crowbar and broke it apart from window to window, bumper to bumper, tire to tire. He even broke the handles of the door, the headlights and spray painted his coach's car in bold and red words: THIS IS YOUR FAULT. He caused extreme damage to the car.
It became another big regret he did. Actually his biggest regret ever because not only did it get him expelled from Devenford Prep, it caused his friendships with Brett and the others to be severed.
His mom and stepdad were shocked, and petrified, at his most recent action. That made him instantly regret what he did because the damages had to be paid by his parents and he was sent to a psychiatrist for his psychotic behavior.
The psychiatrist diagnosed him with a violent anger condition. It was called Intermittent Explosive Disorder. Or for short, IED.
Liam, after hearing this, thought that he was mentally ill. He was a menace, and that having IED cursed his life. Having to be prescribed medication because he has anger issues. Having to control himself because he was a ticking time bomb. Having to keep his emotions in check because he didn't want to see the horrified looks of his mom and stepdad when he destroyed his coach's car.
Liam was convinced that he was a monster.
Then he transferred to Beacon Hills High where Mason attends, and things for him changed there.
From having a good day in school only to end in spraining his ankle in tryouts when two juniors who were also his teammates, Scott McCall and Stiles Stilinski, tried to prevent him from scoring again only for Scott to ambush him over the shoulder and hurt his ankle.
Liam was expecting to get disappointment from his stepdad at the hospital only for him to be reassured that he wasn't mad at him. But deep down, Liam still felt uncertain and melancholic. All because he struggles with his emotions and is an IED.
The disorder alone makes him feel chained and trapped to his demonic anger that he hates so much. Then it gets worse for him as the days go by. From Getting held hostage by a diabolical, cannibal man to seeing Scott turn into a FUCKING WEREWOLF, to getting bitten by him and kidnapped by him and placed in the bathtub of his older teammates house. To slamming a chair into Scott's back and punching Stiles in the face with the oh so familiar anger, to his ankle somehow mysteriously healing that same night, to all of a sudden hearing every type of sound and heartbeat of every student there. It did nothing but frighten and frustrate him because WHAT THE FUCK SCOTT DID TO HIM!?
Fearing he'd take out his explosive anger and frustration on Mason, he leaves, to get cornered by the very same juniors who injured him at tryouts and held him hostage in a bathtub. It didn't end well, because Liam was on the verge of exploding and beat the living crap out of the junior after Scott's declaration of stating that he and Liam were 'brothers' and that 'the bite is a gift'. Had it not been for Stiles's intervention of wording the phrase differently, Liam was going to break something or break either of their faces. The rage boiled within him but repressing it.
Then, it got worse. He thought that after being asked out and invited to a party by a girl named Kira, who fell down the stairs of the school much to his worry, things would change.
But the seething anger inside of him that was there this morning didn't disappear, instead it amplified. From hearing too much noises to his breathing labored and teeth clenched, his IED infused anger got stronger. His glance at the rearview mirror of the car showed him his face. The agitated anger with his laboring breathing, grinding teeth, and eyebrows forming the scowl he felt like snapping for no reason. Other than the exception of the fiery anger that was all over his body.
The moment he realized the empty courtyard of the lakehouse and lack of cars or Mason and attendees, he knew something was off, and just as he stepped in the house to see the very two juniors he despises very much now along with their classmates, he was prevented by Kira from leaving who was on their side as well. This began to spike the anger inside of Liam and it was threatening to explode. Something inside of him wanted to explode and go on a rampage.
After hearing that his upperclassmen were supernatural creatures which he couldn't believe minus Stiles, and Malia's changing eye color and finally Scott's mentioning of the full moon, Liam's blood began boiling.
"The Moon's already out." Liam snarls with dawning rage. His teeth were clenched, his heart racing like he ran a marathon.
"And you're starting to feel something, aren't you?" Scott, the one who bit him, asked.
Something inside of Liam snapped
"I feel like I'm surrounded by a bunch of psychotic nutjobs! You guys are out of your fucking minds! I DON'T KNOW HOW YOU DID THAT EYE THING, AND I DON'T CARE! I'M WALKING OUT THE DOOR RIGHT NOW—AND IF ANYONE TRIES TO STOP ME I SWEAR TO GOD I'M GONNA—!" Through his clenched teeth, boiling blood, and volcanic rage, a screeching sound of tires invaded Liam's supernatural hearing, making him howl in pain at the noise. It was unbearable for him to hear.
Then everything was a blur afterwards.
One minute he was dragged away by Scott and Kira, then trying to hurt the Alpha werewolf in his rage to then being knocked out.
After that and waking up under the influence of the full moon, he saw crimson red. That's literally what he sees in his own vision after breaking free and once again attacking Scott. He wanted to hurt him. He wanted to make Scott into a gaping hole! He WANTED TO MAKE SCOTT BLEED!!!
"WHAT DID YOU DO TO ME!? THIS IS YOUR FAULT!!! THIS IS YOUR FAULT!!!" Liam roars in the Alpha's face, this newfound and terrifying power coursing his veins and IED infused anger that only increased further with his crimson vision and animalistic desire to hurt Scott due to the pure unadulterated rage that only thinks of him to be violent and angry.
The sound of an arrow whipping in the air and exploding beside him causes Liam to jump before running through the woods.
He didn't get far after seeing several of these silver, bright light stands surrounding him. The moment the lights began flashing, Liam begins screaming and howling in agony from these intense and high pitched noises that hurt his ears and hearing, rattling his brain. It was painful and mind blogging that made him shift back to his human form.
When those things were turned off by Scott, the very familiar feelings of guilt, shame, and sadness. He smelled blood and realized he scratched Scott from his rage. The venomous words that slipped out of his mouth from his vicious episode that he said to Scott, to Stiles, to Lydia, to Kira, to Malia…he felt immediate sorrow for calling them psychotic nutjobs, when he feels like a psychotic nutjob for what just transpired and transforming into a werewolf.
"What is happening to me?" Liam asks to the upperclassmen Alpha werewolf. His voice was hoarse, broken and guilty. He knew his aggression was bad, but…not this brutal. He felt like a monster. Maybe he was born a monster before getting bitten.
"The same thing that happened to me." Scott replies, staring at Liam in what appears to be a reminiscent and empathetic gaze. The freshman heard another heartbeat nearby but was too caught up in his emotions to even care.
Liam's vision was blurry, eyes stinging with salty water. He always wanted to be a good person. He wanted to make others feel like he isn't a bad person. That he is this athletic, video gamer, chivalrous, cocky and social teenager wanting to feel accepted.
But after all the things that happened from late elementary school to now, he doesn't deserve another chance. He really doesn't, but now he's scared. Scared that his mom and his stepdad find out he is a werewolf. Another thing to add for them to think that he is a monster.
"I can't…they can't know about this. My mom…my stepdad…I can't do this to them again." He stutters out. He feels a tear cascade down his face.
"What do you mean again?" Scott asks in concern
"I got kicked out of school." Liam clarifies. He hold back a sob before continuing. "I deserved it. The way…they looked at me what did to that car…" He trails off, his emotions becoming unbearable and the oxygen starting to bind his lungs like a large weight pressed against them. He was having trouble breathing.
"They can't see me like this." He cries out, tears spilling down. He inhales heavily as he begins to hyperventilate. "Like…like a…psychotic—" Monster.
"—Like a monster." Scott finishes for him. The word alone stabbed Liam like a million arrows. He wished that word never existed. He closes his eyes to prevent anymore tears from spilling out, tired of being seen vulnerable and weak. But he felt Scott move, standing in front of him.
"Liam…" The Alpha—his Alpha calls out to him.
"You're not a monster. You're a werewolf, like me."
Those words, made Liam open his eyes, gaze up at Scott. The upperclassmen had a genuine smile on his face. This shocked Liam. Because no one ever smiled at him for his actions that he regrets, no one not ever called him a monster, minus Mason who didn't berate him for his IED. No one ever lifts him a hand from his melancholic shame, just like Scott is doing right now.
"You're a good person Liam. A charismatic person, a way better athlete than I am in lacrosse, and a werewolf with a human heart. You're not psychotic. You're a person and a werewolf with feelings.
Liam stares at his Alpha with wonder, admiration and…genuine. Because the warmth radiating behind Scott's Alpha aura was peaceful and caring. Like Liam meant someone to him, like he was being seen as a person and not a monster.
Scott's smile and friendly nature made him feel like he was accepted. That he mattered to Scott.
The dark and negative weight on his chest was lifted and replaced with reassurance, with warmth, and with stability. The tears in his eyes vanished and he felt relieved in some way. It was a breathtaking feeling, like a bond was forming between him and Scott.
"Don't worry about the other packmates. They know you don't mean those words." Scott tells him. Liam had other ideas.
"No. I–I want to apologize to then. I want to apologize for what I said and how much I mean those apologies." Liam replies, a mixture of anxiousness and determination in his face.
Scott simply nods with a smile. "We should head back, so that they don't worry." He looks between his beta and Chris. Liam nods before walking with Scott. A ghost of a smile is on the freshman lips.
Maybe…things won't turn out bad as they will be even if he has a long turbulent road ahead of him.
---I hope you enjoyed this one shot and I have a bunch of back up work for Liam Dunbar Appreciation week but I will be posting them soon! Thank you @liamdunbarappreciation for the inspiration and content!---
