Year 1 - Moon 3 - Greenleaf
Howlpaw's training with Kestrelstar goes poorly as her mind seems somewhere else.
"Kestrelstar, is something wrong?"
"Why do you ask, Howlpaw?"
"Well... I normally can't knock you off your paws that fast."
There was no response from the leader, only a faint twitch of her tail indicating her annoyance.
"And normally you'd tell me off for even asking you something like this."
"Then why are you asking?" Kestrelstar muttered with a growl.
Howlpaw tilted his head, frowning in thought before looking back down at his mentor. "Are you thinking about Maplefern and her kits?"
With a sudden push being felt under his paws, Howlpaw yelped as he tumbled back, Kestrelstar stretching herself out with a huff. The SeedClan leader eyed her apprentice, ears flattening before she glanced away.
"...How'd you know?"
The fluffy gray tom lowered his gaze nervously, tail wrapping around his paws. "You just seemed a little out of it ever since you and Fallendapple spoke," he admitted. His gaze shifted uncomfortably as he finally met Kestrelstar's gaze. "It's no secret she's not very happy about Maplefern being here."
"Well, she needs to get used to it," Kestrelstar growled, licking her paws before brushing it over her ear, frowning slightly as she caught Howlpaw's worried gaze. "Look Howlpaw, it's a bit complicated to explain. You're young so-"
"I wasn't around for The Great Division, I know..." Howlpaw's ears flattened with a solemn gaze. His dull expression flicked to the side, paws kneading the ground as he resisted speaking further.
Kestrelstar paused. "...We haven't told you stories, have we?"
The apprentice seemed to stiffen a bit before giving a small nod. "No one likes to talk about it..."
A pang of guilt clawed at her chest, Kestrelstar dipping her head with an apologetic gaze. "I'm sorry... When we found you... well you were so full of life. You came to SeedClan without any of the burdens we carried. None of us felt prepared to tell you what happened... Not the full tale that is."
Howlpaw's gaze widened, a mixture of fear and intrigue present in his wide hazel eyes. However, very quickly did he seem to feel guilty for wanting to know more, lowering his head.
"I know about Serpentpelt..." he slowly admitted. "He was Quillbeak's father... and the former Mediator?"
"That is right." Kestrelstar would take a seat next to her apprentice, her fur brushing against is as her voice remained low and calm. "He was a quiet, but very kind cat. He swore his life to keeping SeedClan at peace, always doing everything in his power to avoid war."
Howlpaw tilted his head slightly. "But Quillbeak seemed to always want a war. Why would he if his father was so against it?"
"Well..." Kestrelstar held her breath, flicking her ear in thought as to how to put this. "Serpentpelt wasn't a fighter - not like Quillbeak that is. He tried to prevent war... but war was ultimately what killed him. That was what The Great Division was, Howlpaw. And Quillbeak..." She trailed off, amber eyes seeming to darken. "...Quillbeak has a hard time forgiving those who took his father away. And so do many cats."
"Like Fallendapple?" Howlpaw softly asked.
"...Yes. Like Fallendapple." Kestrelstar's eyes welled with grief as she thought back to the small scrap of light brown fur - the pathetic pile that Fallenkit was when Quillbeak carried her back to camp, covered in blood. She had avoided thinking about that day... about Serpentpelt and the others, about Havenbramble and Chiveleaf - and the dark gaze of Locuststar.
"Kestrelstar?"
Howlpaw's soft mew snapped the she-cat out of it, shaking her head as she gazed at her apprentice. "I'm sorry. I promise I can tell you more. It's just..."
"No, it's ok." Howlpaw offered a small smile, reassuring as he tilted his head. "I think I can understand Quillbeak, Fallendapple, and the others a little better at least so... It's ok. Maybe just... another day."
"You will know... one day," Kestrelstar affirmed. Touching her nose to her apprentice's ear, she flicked her tail, nodding for him to follow.
"Now let's do that again. And this time I won't be distracted, so it won't be as easy, alright?"
"Yes Kestrelstar!"
