Dec 13, 2013
i wrote a paper for my english class that argued that tumblr makes us better people...
and my professor decided to make a tumblr account...
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i wrote a paper for my english class that argued that tumblr makes us better people...
and my professor decided to make a tumblr account...
the biggest problem i have with women is when they try to make men feel inferior because they can do something better than a man.
"Jimmy, isn't my apple pie the best you've ever eaten?" "SHUT UP, MOM! SHUT YOUR WHORE MOUTH!"
when you suddenly have so much financial trouble from out of nowhere that you honestly consider becoming a prostitute or selling your organs on the black market.
seriously..... wtf?
just informed that i am, in fact, a girl in real life.
and here i was gonna do a whole bit about sandwiches...
i wanna fake my own death to see who pretends that they really cared about me.
seriously. are you guys in?
in second grade i got a state award for a story i wrote about a turkey who ran away from home to get a driver's license.
Look at his smallness, Compared to my tallness, My porcelain doll-ness, My "port in a squall"-ness, My "Kids in the Hall"-ness, My "Pink Floyd's The Wall"-ness, My "Three Parts of Gaul"-ness, My just all-in-all-ness, My wonderful me-ness, My hammer, the pe- -ople can tell, That I'm awfully swell, While Neil has a weird smell I'm just saying, Purell!
Better Than Neil - Nathan Fillion