I AM SO GLAD SOMEONE SHARES MY HATRED OF SEAGULLS OMG
okay everyone, I would like you all to sit down and listen to this story about why all seagulls are fucking assholes.
I was four years old, and my dad was taking me out fishing. He bought me my own little Mickey Mouse rod, it was adorable and I was wearing my little neon windbreaker (it was the 90′s, so it was high fashion) and i was so excited because I had gone fishing before with my dad but now!! i have my own pole!!!
So we get to the beach where we are going to cast off from, and I am so excited. My dad is carefully teaching me how to cast out and after what seemed like FOREVER he finally let me do it on my own.
I have the worm on the end and I pull back as far as my little child arms let me and then I just cast out and I’m so excited, I’m seeing the line and the worm fucking fly through the air and I want you to imagine my face like straight up anime happiness expression okay? Like, my eyes were shining and I was seconds from exploding from joy
But...What? What’s this? A FUCKING SEAGULL SWOOPED DOWN AND SWIPED MY ENTIRE FISHING ROD.
That’s right. Not just the worm. Not just the line. THE ENTIRE. FUCKING. ROD.
I just start chasing this dumb fucking bird down the beach but little legs+sand cannot keep up with a winged beast. So after fifteen minutes I just collapse on the beach, sobbing. My dad catches up to me and picks me up and we go home and he offered to buy me a new pole but I didn’t want one. I wanted my Mickey pole but that fucking greedy ass, rat-ass, DEVIL WITH WINGS stole it and every since I have fucking hated seagulls with all my might