Wait no, I wasn’t ready for the angst. Can’t we have good and sweet L x Matsuda headcanons??
Okay, listen, not being ready for the angst? Big ass mood, Anon. I wasn't ready either, so have some extra hcs for these disaster gays because I need to heal from my own sad writing
(Here are links for parts one, two, and three, which I recommend to read in order so your heart can break accordingly)
L had never been too much of a fan of physical contact, but he was always happy when Touta approached him, seeking for a hug, or to hold hands, or to give him a peck on the cheek.
L never told him this, but he had never been able to truly feel safe until he hugged him for the first time.
Matsuda would always put a blanket over Ryuzaki every time he'd be too exhausted and passed out wherever. He'd also kiss his forehead if no one was around.
During the confinement days, L would curl up on Matsuda's arms, reading data of the case. He got distracted time and again, just looking at him or talking to each other.
Especially distracted if Touta fell asleep, because it meant Ryuzaki could be a bit self indulgent and study his face to his heart's content, memorising every detail.
They had silly arguments every now and then, like the correct way to eat some sweet, or if a straw had one or two holes, but no real fights.
Matsuda would tease him every now and then in a playful way, but be reduced to a stammering mess with just a quick kiss. L would be specially smug for a couple hours after that.
Ryuzaki wrote notes and doodled in his napkins messages directed at Matsu, which he would read and keep after picking up the empty coffee mugs or food trays.
Matsuda loved origami, and would leave some paper figure every other day when bringing L the case files or drinks. Each origami had a drawing of a heart hidden, and Ryuzaki always tried to find them without unfolding the origami.
He kept every single one of them on a box under his favourite chair in the floor that served as his and Light's apartment.
L told him his name the night before the broadcast. It was late, both of them lying down in the dark, holding hands, eyes locked with each other.
Touta squeezed his hand harder, as Ryuzaki silently cried and told him about his life story in a whisper. L felt the need to confess every failure and fear to him, afraid that he wouldn't have another chance.
When he finished talking, Matsu just brought him to his chest, wishing to being able to protect the man he had grown to love from his past, and from what the future might have in store for him.
L returned the hug, his heart a little lighter, his lips curved in a smile. No matter what, he swore he would protect Touta.
Nothing would harm his sunshine, not if he had anything to say about it.