divider credits | self-indulgent but I also know a lot of folks like this guy so… hehe. now how many stupid petnames for Don can i fit into this “fic” …
MAFIOSO DATING HEADCANONS
- He’s demiromantic, though he prefers using the umbrella term aromantic.
- If he wasn’t in the mafia business, he’d be dropping your name / title every other sentence.
- Disposes of anyone who makes you uncomfortable. That guy who was semi-flirting with you made you feel weird? No worries - he’s gone.
- Don and all of his goons are “scary dog” material. You’ll never have to worry about taking a long walk at night - you’ve got “spooky dog” privileges.
- If one of his enemies had enough nerve to even simply imply they’d do something to you, they won’t be heard from again.
- Not the jealous type; he’s secure in himself and his relationship with you. He believes that if you wanted something different, you’d tell him and/or leave. However, this doesn’t mean he won’t be by your side whenever he gets to see you - he’s protective, maybe to a fault.
- Not entirely keen on PDA; an arm around your shoulder? Sure. A hand on your back? Absolutely. Holding hands? Ehh… maybe. The only reason he’s hesitant about PDA is because he doesn’t want anyone getting ideas. If any rivals know you’re dating THE Mafioso, that’s an immediate target on your back. Don isn’t risking that - you’re much too important to him.
- Affection in private, however? Oh, boy, don’t get him started. He’s like a damn rabbit: nuzzling his face into the crook of your neck, arms wrapped around your waist, the fattest grin displayed on his lips - expect a few smooches on your cheeks and neck. He’s infatuated, I fear.
- When holding you, he’ll often rock the both of you if he can’t thump his foot.
- Loves playing cheesy, older, romantic jazz songs while slow dancing with you: hand in hand, gaze held within the tender moment. He’s all yours, forever and always.
- He enjoys it when you’re seen in his clothing - his big, fuzzy coat over your shoulders makes him feel an odd sense of pride.
- Loves marathoning movies with you and is a total snugglebunny about it.
- If you’re a talker, he’ll always listen to whatever you have to say, especially if you’re talking about any hyperfixations or special interests; he’ll buy you everything you want relating to those.
- He wears a ring on his left ring finger, so it usually draws a couple of questions. Despite not being your husband (yet, if that’s what you desire), he always replies in the same way: he’s married. He discloses no more information after that.
- If you stole his hat, he’d silently walk up to you, snatch it back, and say, “Don’t–– don’t do that again.” It’s clear he’s flustered; he appreciates his hat very much.
- Speaking of his hat, if Don asked you out first, he’d hold his hat solemnly in his hand, allowing you a good look into his eyes, before asking for your time on a first date. If you asked Don out, he’d do the same motion with a redder face. Hat in hand, he’d courteously accept. Damn this fluttery feeling - is this what infatuation really feels like?
- Of course, he puts his hat back once you both reintegrate into society. You’re one of the only ones who gets the privilege to see his unobscured face.
- Assuming Don’s the one who ripped the bandaid off first, (since, if you did, i’m not sure where you’d take him for a first date) I don’t think he’d tell you where you’d both be heading - maybe for a sweet surprise, maybe not.
- He’d end up taking you to a luxurious restaurant: leather booths, elegant light fixtures, a decked-out bar, and maybe even a damn band, too! It’s crystal clear that this fine dining establishment costs much more than the average eatery. And you… well, given the off chance that you actually wore something fancy, there’d be no problem! Given the likely chance you haven’t, Don’d fix that. Of course, he wouldn’t mind. He’d just make a mental note to take you clothes shopping later.
- Don’t worry about the price. Seriously. If you even mention your wallet, Don’s already pulling his out, chatting with the waiter / cashier. This man is a menace when it comes to money (if his profession didn’t make it obvious enough) - he won’t let you pay for anything.
- Tacking on, he’ll always carry your bags. Always; loves doing favors for you.
- Whenever you step into the Sonnellino Casino, the family’d make damn good sure you’d always be the winner. Playing poker? Four of a kind, another full house, and a royal flush? How unbelievably lucky! Of course, they’d make it believable; subtlety is the Sonnellinos’ specialty. No one would want to play with a dirty, triple 7 hittin’, prize-stealing cheater, after all.
- There’s occasional teasing from the boys. (mostly Soldier. Sometimes Consigliere and Contractee have a little fun, too, but it’s mostly Soldier) Of course, just one glare from Don silences them for a day. maybe.
- As much as he loves you, sometimes he can’t indulge you with every thing you want to do. That’s why his goons help him out! You need to head to the store? Alright, Caporegime can come with - if you’re comfortable.
- Mafioso trusts Caporegime and Contractee the most when it comes to helping you out - don’t get me wrong, he trusts all his goons, but he trusts those two the most with those situations.
Soldier would probably do something stupid to impress you and then get both of you into trouble. That, or he’d buy you as many things as you’d want. Not that it’s an issue to Don, but nobody needs to eat three bags full of sweets (though if you do, I’m certainly not one to judge… LMAO)
Consigliere, although (usually) much more behaved than Soldier, would likely find loopholes in Don’s orders in order to spoil you, too. He’s much more sly with it, however: “Well, ya never said we couldn’t do dat, Boss.”
- Honestly, the goons might just have a thing for you. Seems you’ve got the whole gang wrapped around your finger, now.
- You two have a special sort of connection; whenever you enter a room Don’s in, or vice versa, your eyes lock onto one another, and you can immediately tell what the other is feeling.
- Tacking onto this, whenever you two are together, Don’s smile is always genuine. He can’t help it, he loves seeing you.
- You can totally boss Don around; he doesn’t mind it all that much. Honestly, he wouldn’t mind it at all if you pulled him in by his tie and smooched his face off. (He wants it.)
- His pet names for you include: Doll, Handsome and/or Beautiful, Darling, Toots, Prince/ss (or Royalty), Coniglio, Cuore mio, Caro, and Tesoro (Bunny, my Sweetheart, Dear, and Treasure, respectively)
- ONLY calls you “embarrassing” pet names in Italian. (ex: bunny) Will not be caught dead calling his partner “bunny” in English.
- He loves to lightheartedly tease; it’s cute, little things - the type of guy to say, “My lips are cold,” to get a (not so sly) kiss.
- If you’re both up early, he’d take you for a late-night / early-morning drive around town. Whether you both sit in silence, enjoying the sound of each other’s breath, or if you two are chatting about whatever’s on the sky’s mind, Don wouldn’t trade it for the world.
- When further into your relationship and you’re both much more serious about it, he says, “I love you,” a lot, especially out of nowhere. He says it like a prayer; as if he’ll disappear any second from now.