A/N: What you need to know is that Marth and Roy have been mutually pinning each other for a long time, Toon Link unknowingly revealed to Roy that Marth liked him and Roy was too stupid to confess.
Prompt number: 4 “I know you didn’t ask for this.”
Fandom (AU if applicable): Super Smash Bros
Rating: T because of the implications at the end.
Warnings/Tags: Roy throwing a box on Ike
Words:Â Idk, I never know.
Ships: Marth x Roy
Roy was hesitating between two wrapping papers. The first one was a sappy white paper with red hearts and the second one was blue and gold which reminded him of the prince he was deeply in love with. He ultimately chose the second one because he was sure everyone would start rumors if they saw him walking around with a present wrapped in hearts.
He set the wrapping paper on his desk and took out a box of chocolate and a card he had hidden in his closet. He had spent hours choosing the right chocolates and days drafting what he would write on the card. He needed to make sure it was impossible to misinterpret anything.
The redhead was in the middle of wrapping the box when he heard a voice asking him what he was doing. He turned around to face Marth who was really curious about the box Roy was desperately trying to hide. Roy had been so focused on the box that he didn’t notice the prince taking the defenseless card lying on the table.
“I’ve had these feelings for you since-” Marth read out loud before Roy snatched the card out of his hands, “Who’s this for?”
“Um, it’s from my dad to my mom,” Roy lied, “He’s telling her that he misses her and wants her to visit him in Pherae.”
“So, why do you have it?”
“Dad, wanted me to give her chocolates. It’s totally normal in the plains to get your kid to give your present to your spouse. She loves her homeland so dad likes honoring their traditions.”
“Can I see?”
“No, it’s embarrassing!”
Roy’s protests weren’t stopping Marth from trying to figure out what was being hidden. The prince tried grabbing the partially wrapped box but his grabbing range wasn’t that good anymore. Roy lifted the box in the air where the shorter swordsman had no way of reaching it. Sadly, he hadn’t taken into account that Marth could see the box from where he was.
“Those are some nice chocolates. What’s wrong with me seeing them?”
“I told you it’s embarrassing!” Roy blushed, “I don’t want you seeing it.”
The redhead regretted his lie as he noticed that his crush was visibly hurt by it. He tried coming up with a way to assure Marth that he didn’t really mean it but the prince told him it was fine. The two awkwardly sat in silence until Marth broke it.
“Hey, Roy, do you like someone? That box is for who you like, right?”
“Um… It’s...”
“You told me I was your best friend. Why can’t you tell me? Are you in love with someone I hate? Or is it someone who hates me?”
“No, that’s not it. I-I’ll tell you when I deliver it. If I forget, you can punch me or something.”
---
Roy spent the rest of the day trying to avoid Marth. He wasn’t doing a very good job since the blue-haired prince kept following him. Roy couldn’t blame him, he knew Marth liked him and would probably want to know who Roy liked. It was endearing in a way, Marth had no idea he was jealous of himself.
Roy walked around the mansion at least four times before giving up. He could already hear rumors spreading about him and he didn’t want anything to do with them. He grabbed Marth by the hand and took him outside to the garden which happened to be devoid of any fighters. There was nothing that could get in the two swordsmen’s way.
“Marth, do you want to tell me something?” Roy asked as he looked at the man of his dreams, “You’ve been following me all day. You don’t need to be afraid.”
“I’m...” the prince blushed as he avoided eye contact, “I’m in… I’m… I’m in desperate need of some Japanese lessons! Cloud told me my Japanese has gotten worse lately. We should start speaking Japanese together again.”
Roy knew that was a lie. He didn’t call Marth out on it as he could tell he looked distressed. Instead, he took Marth by the hand and led him to a bench where they both sat down without saying a word.
“Roy, I know you probably don’t want me to, but can I look at the card you wrote?”
“No… I should just tell you myself what’s in it.”
Roy threw the card in a nearby trash can and moved closer to Marth. He wrapped his arms around the prince and let him rest his head on his shoulder. The two enjoyed each other’s company and the warmth radiated by their embrace.
“I guess I should start by apologizing to you,” Roy smiled nervously as his face heated up, “I’ve been ignoring your feelings for way too long and I’ve hurt you.”
“That’s an understatement,” Marth frowned as he pushed the redhead away, “It’s not like apologizing will change what’s already happened...”
“Marth, please let me finish! You never let me!”
“What? I let you finish, you just choose not to. You never go through with anything when I’m involved! That or you just leave me behind.”
“I-”
“Forget it, it’s not like you really care about how I feel anyway. I hate that about you.”
“Of course, I care about you! I care about how you feel. Why would I apologize for hurting you if I didn’t? I want you to be happy.”
“Roy, if you hate me, just tell me. I don’t want to be hurt by you even more. Once was more than enough.”
“Ugh, why can’t I ever get through to you? You’re so stubborn, it’s like you want me to hate you. That may end up happening if you carry on like this.”
“Gee, I’m sorry for not wanting to be hurt again by an idiot like you. But, I don’t even know what you think of me. You know how I’m in love with you. So, why can’t you-”
Marth’s response was interrupted as Roy pulled him in for a kiss. As the redhead deepened the kiss, Marth closed his eyes and wrapped his arms around Roy’s neck. He wished the moment could last forever but before he knew it, Roy had broken the kiss.
“M-Marth, I-I love you!” the redhead stuttered as his face turned the same color as his hair, “Ever since Melee, I’ve been in love with you. W-will you go out with me?”
“W-what!?” Marth asked as he covered his face to hide his blush, “Y-you’re joking, right? I’m just imagining things I want to hear. You don’t actually want to go out with me.”
“Life would probably be easier if that were the case… But I wouldn’t want it to be that way.”
“Same here,” Marth grinned before giving Roy a quick peck on the lips, “I love you too.”
“Um… I know you didn’t ask for this,” Roy blushed as he shoved the neglected box of chocolates into the prince’s arms avoiding all eye contact, “But this is for you.”
“Thanks,” Marth smiled as he saw the badly wrapped box he was now holding.
“No complaining about how it will make you fat?” Roy teased before being pushed off the bench.
The newly formed couple laughed and spent the rest of the afternoon eating all the chocolate in the box Roy bought without a care in the world. They just wanted to be together and enjoy each other’s company without being disturbed.
---
Marth and Roy returned inside the mansion holding hands and catching their fellow fighters’ attention. Most fighters assumed they had finally decided to make their “secret” relationship public. Master Hand was paying Crazy Hand because he lost the bet.
Cloud and Peach were congratulating Marth like normal friends. Meanwhile, Ike was speaking way too enthusiastically to Roy. The dude was having the time of his life. He was really excited to not have to deal with unresolved sexual tensions anymore.
“If you two ever need the room to yourselves, just tell me and I’ll gladly leave, I’ll even leave right now if you want,” the mercenary told Roy as he gave him a gift, “Just don’t forget to use these. Don’t want anything bad happening to you.”
“Ike, what the actual fuck?”
“Hey, no need to thank me. I’m just doing what anyone would do for their favorite boy.”
“I don’t want your condoms!” the redhead blushed as he threw the box of condoms at Ike’s face before grabbing Marth’s hand, “We’re going on a date, Marth.”
“Have fun Marth,” Cloud waved.
“Aw, I wish I had a nice boyfriend too,” Peach smiled.
A/N: Yo, what is up? I’m back with the crack. I’m in such a good mood because my three fav players (Leff, Armada and my man, Samsora) made it into summit.
Anyway, this is part of the fic I started last fictober I suck at romance. You can read it if you want, chapter 4 is my favorite one. But to summarize, you just need to know that Link wants to break up with Zelda because he’s bored of their relationship and that Ganondorf works at the Apple store in costumer service where he’s really just doing odd jobs and getting paid a lot to the point he’s the asset of the store.
Prompt number: 1 “It will be fun, trust me.”
Fandom (AU if applicable): Super Smash Bros
Rating: Idk, T.
Warnings/Tags: kpop
Words: Idk, I just write everything in a long file with a bunch of crap, so I couldn’t count.
Ships: Link x Zelda. A bit of Marth x Roy, mainly Ike making jokes about them. At this point, I think Ganondorf x his job at the Apple store qualifies as a ship.
“Won’t lie, you’re the last person I expected to see here,” Ganondorf admitted as he stared at the short blond in front of him, “You must be in quite the pickle if you’re asking me for help.”
“I have no other choice,” Link sighed, “I’ve tried everything and I always fail.”
“Not surprised. What do you need help with anyways?”
“Help me break up with Zelda.”
“You truly are desperate.”
---
Ganondorf had gathered Link and his friends to the training room. No one was quite sure why they had to be there but Link had told them it would be fun.
Ganondorf entered the room holding a huge radio and a bag full of CDs and accessories. He set everything up and soon, the training room looked more like a stage.
“I am training you guys for karaoke,” Ganondorf announced, “You five will be singing some Kpop songs about breakups with Link as the center. Any objections?”
“I can’t read!” Pit reminded Ganondorf.
“And I can’t dance, like at all,” Roy admitted, “Dancing doesn’t run on mom’s side of the family.”
“I don’t like karaoke,” Ike said, “I’ve never even sung before.”
“Can I be G-Dragon?” Marth asked.
Ganondorf facepalmed so hard he almost had to go to the doctor. He was not ready to work with the group of idiotic friends. When they were all separated, the five friends were actually quite competent, but having them all in one room reduced their collective IQ to 0.
But there was no time for the Gerudo king to worry about his own feelings. He had to get the job done, nothing was more important than his reputation as the most valuable employee of the Apple store.
After a week of training, the boys were ready. But they still had to choose a song and that was probably the hardest part of the whole plan. They needed a song that was quite clear on the message Link wanted to convey.
Ganondorf had prepared a list of songs but clearly, none of the boys besides Link really cared about the list. They all wanted to sing their favorite songs instead and those songs happened to be the complete opposite of the concept Ganondorf and Link wanted.
“No, Marth, we can’t sing Bang Bang Bang,” Roy argued, “Fantastic Baby is clearly the superior BigBang song.”
“That’s not true and you know it!” Marth snapped, “Bang Bang Bang is way better, plus it fits with our breakup concept. If the only word Zelda understands is bang, she’ll think that Link’s shooting her.”
“But according to your line distributions, we’re the only ones saying bang bang bang. She won’t think Link’s the one shooting her.”
“She’ll think that you two should go bang bang bang in your room,” Ike smirked, “We should sing As if it’s your last.”
“I want to sing Gangnam Style!” Pit smiled.
Ganondorf sighed and looked at Link for answers. The Hylian said he’d go ask Zelda what music she liked so that he could choose the exact opposite.
---
Zelda was walking around the Smash Mansion’s garden when Link ran up to her. Link never ran up to her, so she knew he had something important to say.
“Zelda, what’s your favorite Kpop group?”
Zelda was shocked. Link never asked her questions. Was he finally trying to be a decent boyfriend?
“Um, I only really like EXO and Red Velvet.”
“BigBang and Blackpink it is.”
“What?”
“Nothing. Do you want to go to the karaoke tonight?”
“Karaoke?”
“It will be fun, trust me.”
Zelda naturally accepted. She didn’t know why Link chose the karaoke but he always chose weird places for their dates. She was excited Link was the one asking her on a date for once. But she couldn’t help but think something was wrong.
---
It was the night of the karaoke. Ganondorf had gathered the boys for one last training session. While the three Fire Emblem lords had a boring fight about what the microphones’ colors should be, Link asked Pit for a request.
“Pit, I need you to act as cute as possible so that you can seduce Zelda,” Link told the angel, “That way, she’ll move over really quickly after our breakup and she won’t be sad about it.”
“But I don’t want to date Zelda,” Pit complained.
“Yeah, I don’t blame you.”
“All of you shut up and listen to my advice!” Ganondorf yelled, “Link, you need to make sure all the random stranger girls fall for you so that Zelda gets even more pissed off. It would be even better if you fell for one so that you’d finally have the motivation to break up with her. Or fall for one of your friends, I don’t care. Just fucking break up with her already, I have a reputation to uphold.”
---
Zelda had chosen her coolest dress in the hopes of impressing Link. Had she really been serious about impressing him, she would have changed her hair.
As she entered the karaoke, she noticed Link and his four friends. Zelda wanted to groan very loudly. Link was obsessed with his friends, it was like he was more in love with them, than he was with her. If he liked one of them, why didn’t he just break up with her?
Zelda wanted to yell at him but she quickly remembered Link had never specified it was a date and sighed with relief. Still, she hoped that if Link really did leave her, it wasn’t for one of his friends. She politely greeted Link and his friends and they all prepared to take the stage.
“I want to dedicate these songs to Zelda,” Link spoke into the microphone.
Zelda was really happy her boyfriend was singing something for her, he had even gotten his friends to help. Except that he’d chosen to sing a song she didn’t like. She assumed he was saving the best for last since he was going to sing multiple songs.
But she didn’t like any of the songs they were singing. She didn’t care that their dancing and singing were almost inexistent, she just wanted to hear songs she liked. Meanwhile, the crowd appeared to be really into the performance.
Zelda got herself a glass of water and sighed as she watched the performance. There was no coordination at all. Marth and Roy were getting significantly more lines than the others because they chose to song Japanese versions of the songs, Link was getting all the English parts and Ike was doing random adlibs. Poor Pit didn’t even have his microphone on.
Zelda felt so bad for the angel. He was clearly putting everything into the performance but since he couldn’t read, he wasn’t allowed to shine. Yet despite this, he stood out to her because of how cute he was.
“What am I thinking?” Zelda said out loud, “I’ve already been through this.”
Zelda was so lost in her thoughts that she didn’t notice the pattern in the song choice. Ganondorf realized Zelda wasn’t paying attention, so he told Link to start plan B.
“Zelda, this song describes what I feel towards you,” Link said.
“Please fuck me, Link!” some random girl in the crowd shouted.
“I’m so sick of this fake love! Fake love!”
Link was screaming at the top of his lungs but Zelda somehow managed to assume that he was being sarcastic and giggled thinking it was a joke. Zelda, why?
It was break time and Ganondorf gathered all the boys in the men's room. Link and Zelda were going to break up or his name wouldn’t be Ganondorf, the Apple Store’s best employee anymore.
“Guys, sing the most disorganized mess you can think of. I’ll play all your songs at the same time.”
Everyone seemed pretty happy with his suggestion. They changed into the outfits they actually wanted to wear and rushed back to the stage.
“Zelda listen carefully,” Link said as the start of Zelda’s favorite song ever started to play.
Now Zelda’s attention was on the stage. She couldn’t wait for Link to start singing. But before she knew it, the song stopped and five songs played at the exact same time. No one was even singing the same song, they were all in their little bubbles and somehow still managing to hype up the crowd.
Zelda was pissed off. She couldn’t believe what had just happened. She hated being pranked. But she hated when her favorite artists were insulted. She went up the stage to confront her boyfriend.
“What was that?” the angry girlfriend yelled, “How could you insult my favorite song like that?”
“After all of this, you couldn’t even figure out what I’ve been trying to tell you?” a clearly annoyed Link asked.
“Oh, I’ve figured it all out. You hate my favorite music. Link, we’re over!”
“Wait… Are you serious? Are we finally breaking up?”
“Yes, you never truly loved me. You just wanted to bang all your friends.”
“Eh, close enough.”
“Oh, wow...” Marth blushed, “I never knew Link felt that way about us.”
“Now that that’s settled,” Ike started, “We just need Roy to take Marth to his room and bang bang bang his brains out so-.”
“W-what!?”
“Great idea, let’s go sing Bang Bang Bang in our room,” Roy interrupted.
---
The boys returned to Marth, Roy and Ike’s room to celebrate Link’s breakup. While Marth and Roy sang BigBang songs, the others talked about the day’s events.
“I can’t believe I’m finally single again!” Link sighed in relief, “And she was the one to break up with me, so she won’t feel depressed for a month.”
“Why did you even date her if you didn’t love her?” Pit asked.
“Her eyebrows were better than my Zelda’s eyebrows. I just had to say yes when she asked me out.”
“I can’t believe you dated her for a petty reason and she broke up with you for a petty reason,” Ike facepalmed.
---
Meanwhile, Ganondorf was sitting on his desk laughing his ass off as he counted all the money he had gotten. He was the best Apple store employee the store could ever dream of. He would have accepted a promotion, but he wouldn’t get paid as much.
The King of Darkness laughed the entire night much to his roommates’ dismay.
---
A/N: I actually really like kpop and I respect all the groups mentioned. I just thought it would be fucking funny to have Link and Zelda break up over kpop.
