Things that would happen if I wrote a Fabian/Maximus team-up
- Lockjaw - Lots of screaming - Fabian wasting time hitting on a woman (WHO DOES NOT WANT TO BE HIT ON) and Maximus trying to pull Fabian away by the ponytail because WE HAVE BUSINESS CORTEZ!!! - Maximus yelling at Fabian to charge him up and saying “PUT IT IN ME LIKE I’M PIETRO” and Fabian refusing to do it “until you stop making this weird!” - Revealing themselves to the heroes all dramatically, gloating, announcing their master plan...and start arguing with each other mid-way through. Heroes just watch in total bafflement. -Co-kidnapping Luna for reasons. Fabian is at first concerned she’ll remember him, then is INSULTED when she doesn’t. Luna is so damn used to getting kidnapped by now that she’s totally chill through the whole thing and like “oh hi Uncle Maximus” and honestly is the smartest one through this whole thing. - They pose as her two dads at one point. Fabian specifies to everyone that “I’m the top one” because god forbid anyone think anyone else. And also that “she’s mine, she has my genes, I had her with a woman.” - They need to get past two female guards. Maximus tells Fabian to woo them with his masculine wiles. Fabian of course agrees with this. Maximus gets by while the ladies beat the shit out of Fabian. This was Max’s plan ALL ALONG. - They are at some point completely naked on a public street. Fabian is flaunting everything he’s got, telling people to feast their eyes on his superiority. Maximus is trying to cover up, shrieking that they are not worthy to look upon him. - Fabian charges a couple women (Crystal and Wanda or Crystal and Medusa, maybe) by slapping their rear ends. They kick ass against a common foe with their hyped up powers. THEN THEY TURN ON HIM. - Did I mention Lockjaw cuz there needs to be some Lockjaw - And 90s character cameos - And some Anne Marie - AND QUICKSILVER,WHO HAS TO DEAL WITH THIS SHIT AND IS SUFFERING