#medically deaf

[1-1-s1ay-2-2]

Some of you never lived in utter silence and it shows.

[living-deaf-society]

My husband is my worst nightmare. He is a hearie. I am a deafie. He still talks at me like I’m a hearing person. I’ve been deaf for three years. He’s never made an effort to learn sign language or write his words on paper or use his phone to show me what he’s saying. He gets upset with me because of my deafness. He blames me for our lack of communication, for my emotional difficulties I’ve experienced while dealing with the loss of sound, and he basically scolds me for feeling the way I feel and for having emotional needs due to the isolating aspect of the deafness. I crave meeting people who are the complete opposite of him. I crave to meet someone, just one person, who practices empathy and understanding. I hate my husband on most days. I dream of walking away and never looking back. I feel being married to him has been the worst experience of my life. I don’t want to be his wife. It feels more like being trapped, and I can’t stand that. I feel lonelier having him in my life. I feel isolated from love and from warmth. I feel overwhelmed being married to him. I feel overwhelmed to start over. I have nothing but the will of my dreams and the courage of my heart.

[1-1-s1ay-2-2]

This is why deaf people tend to be reclusive and oftentimes loners...because being deaf is not a common thing. You take an entire town and you gather them all up in one space, and I’m willing to bet you won’t find many deaf. I’m not talking about hearing loss due form the onset of old age. I’m not talking about people who listened to the music too loud when they were a teen or people who had a serious accident that caused the injury of deafness.

I’m talking about people who were born deaf or born HoH or born with the genetics of becoming medically deaf at some point in their early life. You won’t find many of those people concentrated in the same space. It’s not easy for medically deaf and hoh people to find each other. We are spread out across the world. I can’t just go out to my local grocery store and find a deaf person shopping for apples. I can’t go to the local Walmart and find a deafie admiring a new set of drapes for their living room.

It’s not like every other person is deaf or every every other person. I don’t know, it just seems like I haven’t crossed paths with many deaf people, except the ones I know, like family and well...family. I’ve been a small-towner my entire life, which is probably part of the problem.

[living-deaf-society]

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