#melting everything

[aphyllon]

new fic 📬: just smoke (E, omarkhelly, 3k words)

She hates how he looks at her like she’s a creature under a microscope, hates how his voice is a little rougher and sadder than her Mark’s, hates how badly he wants to get out of here, the same thing she used to want. She hates most of all that even after he’s put his hands on her, told her to her face he doesn’t think she’s real, some part of her can’t believe he meant it. 

***

Helly can’t sleep, and even when she can, she dreams about Mark Scout.

[aphyllon]

just popping in your inbox to say. One of my favorite parts about your multichapter was Mark Scout remembering the sex Mark S had with Helly in the last chapter. Mark S calling Helly pretty is something I didn't know I needed and I am adding that to my personal list.

If you ever want to write any missing scenes in the melting everything about me universe I would kill for that. Whether imarkhelly, omarkhelly, reintegrated!markhelena or one where helena makes an appearance on the severed floor... just throwing that out there

ohhh thank you! I think about melting everything Mark and Helly a lot still. That scene was a real engineering problem to write bc I wanted it to be sweet and innieish, but also Mark S. had to be acting more and more oMark-y, enough that Helly would notice. And then the fact that it was all a flashback. And on top of that I wanted it to be at least kind of hot haha.

It’s fun to think about how the innies would learn to be affectionate with one another and fulfill each others needs w/o the baggage and context outies have around what’s “normal” in sex. Like iMark has realized Helly rly likes to hear his voice and wants to feel loved & validated but he doesn’t know the “rules” of dirty talk so he’s just like, “ur so pretty 😍” now I’m getting emotional abt iMark omg…

I’ve got some bits and pieces of deleted scenes I’m still hoping to finish up and maybe put in a drabble collection one day, but also part of me is like “no don’t touch it it’s fine like it is”. I think if I were to write more in that universe, I’d go for an epilogue. Maybe oMark actually getting to take Helly/Helena to that rope swing.

[aphyllon]

Hi hope i am not bothering.

just wanted to say thank you for your helly saw trap fic.... it feels like everyone is in the saw trap in that fic universe and situation in some ways. imark omark and helly. The switching. The desires. The innie and outie bleed and the fear of disappearing or being consumed. Such delicious territory.

omark and imark gaining each other almost. consuming. Wondering what will happen when your other self appears and you aren't there.

Thank u so much anon 🙂‍↕️ I’m a happy ending enjoyer at heart but I do love to put them through some productive emotional torment.

iMark is dealing with so much in that universe. Some version of the memory bleed his outie is experiencing, plus the fear he could switch and hurt the person he cares about most (he pushed her once, what if he gets desperate and does something worse?), and he’s losing already limited time with her every time it happens.

I cut it bc there wasn’t anywhere good for it to go but there was originally a bit where Helly recounts that iMark tried to insist they stop sleeping together after oMark hurts her, and she’s like, please, I need you here, I’m not letting him take you from me, etc.

[aphyllon]

wait now bc u mentioned omark and the rope swing rather than reintegrated mark, im curious. was the ending of melting everything about me leading into more reintegration like a boulder rolling down a hill and gaining more momentum as time goes on? and each mark gaining each others qualities even if they are both the same in a way at their cores? or do you picture switching happening? I know it was on the ambiguous/open ended side so i might have to go back and re-read the last chapter.

No ur right haha I misspoke! He is fully reintegrated at the end of that fic, with realizing he also loves Helly being kind of the intersect between the two selves that allows them to fully merge. And he’s unknowingly experiencing it over the course of the fic as he’s trying to do right by Helly.

I imagine it being like a “full join” in a SQL sense, he’s fully both of them at the same time, even with all the confusing contradictions that creates. There’s a great line from Gold In The Shadow by Aerielz about a theoretically reintegrated Helena: “She still feels split open. Not in two, just. Wide open.” I imagine him feeling like that going forward from the end of melting everything.

[i-went-to-sleep-and-dreamt--blog]

062

i was somewhere in a house i was staying in and all of a sudden there was a volcanic eruption from the mountain. heaps of orange lava shot up in the sky and then ran down the mountain to the town, melting everything in its path. i tried to outrun it but then decided to climb into a treehouse to get away but the lava reached the tree and then the tree started melting into the lava. my foot was dipped into the lava and burnt then luke came and saved me by carrying me to safety. he then took me to a safe room where willow and murray were. i then ended up living with a random family and staying in their basement and feeling scared all the time because of the volcano and not being able to use my burnt foot.