Johnlock January 2025 #4: Hat
Written for prompts posted by @chriscalledmesweetie.
Chapter rating G.
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“You could just get rid of it, you know,” I say, regarding the infamous Sherlock Holmes hat, after all this time still occupying what seems like a place of honour atop the hatstand by the hall door. “If the whole business winds you up so much.”
“It’s a memento of a case, John,” he replies without looking up. He loves mementoes. I do take issue with the biodegradable ones; there’s only so much space in the freezer.
“One that regularly sends you off on a rant about the superficiality of the public.”
“A phenomenon of which it is healthy to remind myself. Anyway, it doesn’t matter if I discard it. You can still find tatty knockoffs for sale at every street market.”
“I don’t have to hear you whingeing about them the way I do about this one.”
“Try me.” He’s still absorbed in annotating what I think is a violin concerto. Or sonata. Or whatever the difference is. Sometimes I think his mind goes on multiple tracks at once, like a computer running programs.
“What if I bin it myself?”
“That would be disposing of my property, John, which is poor conduct for my flatmate, professional assistant and partner in life.”
I know he’s weaponising my daily astonishment at being his partner. I still pinch myself every time he introduces me that way.
On the other hand, I can weaponise it right back.
“If you don’t either chuck it out, or stop bellyaching about it, I’ll –-”
He finally raises his head.
“You’ll what, John?”
“I’ll tell Mycroft you make me wear it.”
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