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i usually hate photos of myself esp candid ones but oh my god i love how much you can see how much i love max. I LOVE MY HUSBAND!!!!!

#also umm i look thicker and das hot : )#face #sealfies #mermate

I'm very unsure about almost everything I do. In a lucky break from my brain usually bullying myself I one day, about half a year ago, remembered that working on something, that having a plan to follow and having an end result to look at always helped me calm down.

So that one day I was theorising about the mind-bending fire @therealjacksepticeye put his fandom into while I was in great denial of the rest of my life and I decided to put this energy to use and started stiching the Septicegos.

I started with Jameson Jackson and Antisepticeye, giving Marvin the Magnificent a little audience. Coupling Doctor Henrik von Schneeplestein and Robbie the Zombie (I love zombies so I couldn't not include him) was a great match together with Chase Brody.

Jack watching his back then favourite superhero Jackieboyman should've been the last then

but in one of Jack's Would You Rather he said he'd love to be a mermaid (mermate) and that was the perfect match for the long forgotten first ego The Survival Hunter.

I... don't know how to end this post but anyways I hope you like them. I have to admit that I really love how they all turned out and I'm so happy looking at them so I thought they might make someone else smile as well.

#mermay #my art #mermate

What is a MerMate?

That is an easy question, a mermate is a friend of the merfolk.

The more complex question is who are the merfolk?

It seems like the answer to who are the merfolk is simple, a half fish-half human. Yes that is the surface answer. The undercurrent answer is different for each merperson. Some love swimming, athletics, role playing, and there are as many reasons as currents in the ocean.

For me there are a few reasons to be a mermaid.

1) I have had health problems since I was 14. At 31 the issues are managed but one doesn’t just get rid of a chronic illness/disease. Being in water allows me to be active while being low impact, which is very important after multiple surgeries. Unfortunately I don’t have easy access to water. Not even have a bath tub, just a shower.

2) At 30 my desire to spend more time in water became crushing. I would sit and watch mermaid videos on YouTube and weep because it felt like I was supposed to be doing that. So I begin to take mermaid swimming lessons. Unfortunately, that is seasonal and dependent on my carless self to be able to get to the pool.

3) Mermaid is an allegorical symbol that explains how it feels to live in two worlds at once. I am human, that is obvious because I walk the physical plane. However, I am also energetic, I walk the cognitive plane as well.

That last one is the most difficult point for me to discuss. There are a lot of labels attached to what I do: medium, shaman, energy worker, witch, and other less friendly names. Those less friendly names are the reason I have had such difficulties “coming out of the broom closet” with my talents. I grew up in cult Christianity, the kind that shows people miracles. It was world view shattering to learn that those “hand of god miracles” were actually magicians using basic sleight of hand and mental magic on entire congregations. These are the kind of people that taught me and programed my fears and my world view. Unprogramming that bullshit has been difficult and is an ongoing process.

It is difficult to talk about being a medium because I get triggered. Taking on the persona of mermaid to explain the energy work I do helps me to feel safe. Most people live in the surface thinking, “It’s not that deep.” Hiding behind a bubbly surface I am less scared of a torch and pitchfork mob coming after me. But when I find people who are safe, I invite them past the surface to swim the currents with me.

Maybe one day I won’t need the mermaid persona and can take it off and just be me. But for now it helps me face my fear, encourages me to dive deeper, reminds me to breath, and is just damn fun. Or maybe it really is me.

Which brings us back around full circle to the original question,

“What is a MerMATE?”

A mermate is a friend of the merfolk. I am a MerMate, are you?

Paratus sum inbre bullae!!!!

Take care of yourself, because you *ARE* worth it!!! *hugs*

#mermaid #merfolk #medium #mermate #lightworker #deep