Top funniest Neil Jostens ever (not in order)
Walks all the way downstairs from the top of fox tower, picks up Andrews lit cigarette off the ground (which just fell off a ROOF), SMOKES IT, and then salutes him
"fuck you cr*pple!" "What did you just call me?!" "I called you a dead weight has been!!!" *Sprints out of the room"
"Wait Andrew you like me?" "Yeah dw about it" "okay 🤷"
"You know, I get it" (my favorite parts being "Kevin and I talk about your intricate and endless daddy issues all the time" and "I understand that you are mentally UNBALANCED"
Pays someone to knock him out at Eden's so he doesn't say anything, wakes up, throws a glass at aaron, pretends to shower, hitchhikes all the way back to campus, and shows up at wymacks completely nonchalant like yeah whatever I walked
andrew says he doesn't know if he can trust him so Neil SHOVES HIS HAND UP HIS SHIRT
His first introduction to Andrew is like yeah this is the fox goalkeeper he's short and fucking insane. Anyways here's the most erotic description of a sport court you'll ever hear in your life
After being kidnapped and not texting his friends for weeks he sends out a single "happy new year" before shutting his phone off and not responding to anyone again
Immediately after Aaron killed a man with his exy racket asked to have the racket back because "it didn't kill anyone important!" And wouldn't stop bringing it up
gets kidnapped and is about to get tortured for weeks but is still notably upset because "I don't get to keep my 10 :(