Hello! Hope you've been having a good day. Would I please be able to request Simon Minter (Miniminter) x reader where reader is a professional women's footballer who plays for a club of your choice? Thank you if you do☺️
Baby Hello (Simon Minter X FCB! Reader)
Fandom: RPF/Youtubers
Requested: Clearly (I wanted to do something for the Charity match and try a Soulmate AU) (Also, based on this song)
Warnings: Car crash mentioned
POV: Second Person (You/your/They/them)
W.C. 1042
Summary: Soulmate AU/Simon meets the face behind the song that's stuck in his head.
As always, my requests are OPEN
MASTERLIST // HITLIST
~~(^Pinterest)
Simon has had this song stuck in his head for a while now. He didn’t even know what it meant because it was in a language he didn't speak. The first time he heard a song in his head, he thought it was just a random song he heard on the radio, but when he realized that he didn’t understand the lyrics, he asked his parents.
That’s when he learned about soulmates. Everyone hears whatever song is stuck in their soulmate's head.
For as long as he could remember, all of the songs were in a different language, so Simon knew you were probably not English. When he was younger, he had no clue how he was going to run into you. Eventually, when he started the Sidement, he could understand how he could meet you.
Still, this one song was starting to piss him off. He’d learned a few years ago that most of the songs were in Spanish. Don’t get him wrong, it had a good beat, but he didn’t know what it meant. The fact that it had been the consistently same song every couple of weeks for almost two years was killing Simon.
One day, it stopped playing altogether, and he never thought he would miss a song he had never known.
You had heard about the Sidemen briefly from some of your friends and teammates, but nothing would have prepared you for meeting them. KSI had reached out to you a couple of months ago about you coaching during their Charity match, and who were you to say no?
You were currently benched from Barca because of a rotator cuff tear you got from a car accident a few months prior. Funny enough, right after KSI reached out to you about coaching, you got in the accident, and right after the match, you’ll travel to Valencia for your first match back.
A month before the match, you flew out to London and met up with the boys at a private field to start practicing. Your arm was still in a sling most of the time, but that didn’t mean you couldn’t kick a ball.
You stopped at the hotel to drop off your stuff and grab your kit bag before heading out to the field. No one was there yet, so you changed into your practice kit and headed out to the pitch. You pulled out your speaker as you set up your match day playlist to get the vibe going. You tightened the sling before going out to start dribbling the ball and getting a couple of quick shots in. Then, your hype song came on.
Baby Hello by Rauw Alejandro and Bizarrap.
Ever since it came out, it became your hype song and the song you always played just before a match. It got everyone’s mood up, pumped you all up, and got everyone ready for the match ahead.
You quickly fell into your groove; you didn’t even notice when Sidemen FC came bustling into the arena. Immediately, Simon stopped short as he registered what song was matching the song in his head. He left the rest of the boys in the dust as he practically ran over to you.
“What song is this?” He rushed, out of breath, as he stole the ball from you.
“Baby Hello, only the best hype song,” You teased as you both passed the ball between yourselves carelessly. “Why? Do you not like it?”
“No, it’s just been stuck in my head for almost two years now,” Simon laughed, “I think it’s my soulmate’s favorite song.”
“I don't think my soulmate likes music, or maybe I listen to too much music because I never have any random songs stuck in my head,” You chuckled, moving to take a shot at the goal. “Well, except the one time.”
“On no,” Simon dragged out, slightly curious, “What does your soulmate listen to?”
“I don’t even know the name of it. It was something about from the screen, to the something, to the king? Something like that,” You dismissed.
“Why are we still making fun of my song, you dickheads?” JJ shouted as the rest of the boys finally caught up to you and Simon on the pitch.
“Wait, that’s your song?” You questioned, looking at JJ momentarily before looking back at Simon. You gasped, slapping him on the arm, “Wait, so you’re the guy who got this song stuck in my head when I was driving and scared me into a pole!”
“I did nothing!” Simon retorted, raising his hands in surrender. “I would never listen to that song willingly!”
“First off, rude.”
“Not talking about that right now, JJ,” You cut him off, pointing at Simon, “This was a couple of months ago. Like October-ish.”
“That’s when the song came out,” Josh pointed out quickly, gesturing between you, Simon, and JJ.
“The song may have been stuck in my head when we first heard it because we were all making fun of it,” Simon admitted, dropping his head.
“So, it’s your fault I tore my rotator cuff!” You accused in mock offense. “I just met my soulmate, and he’s already out to kill me.”
“I swear I didn’t mean to!” Simon tried to rationalize. “If it makes you feel better, your playlists are way better, and I haven’t listened to Thick Of It since October.”
“It’s called Thick Of It? Really?” You cringed, giving JJ the side eye. Then, you rolled your eyes as you muttered, “English people.”
“Aye, your soulmate is an English person,” Simon quipped back, narrowing his eyes at you.
“And the first thing you’re learning is how to defend a ball,” You replied quickly as you snatched the ball from him and ran to the opposing goal. “If that’s how you expect to play in the charity match, you can kiss any chance at winning adios. This is why you pulled me in, so we need to get to work. We’ve already wasted enough time on our revelations.”
“But we’ll talk about this more later, right?” Simon asked as the rest of the Sidemen followed you, ready to start practicing.
“Take me to dinner first, and maybe I’ll show you what Baby Hello is all about.”
summary: you and your boyfriend babysit Olive for the day. [2.1k words.]
pairing: reader x simon
notes: so incredibly sorry this took me 1,000 years to post 😩 but eventually got it done!! special thanks to @myoddessy for prompting inspo with her headcanons! 💘 we love some olive content, but omg, writing simon with a baby is so hard! mushu makes sense! 🤣 let me know what you thought! 💖 & don’t forget to reblog! <3
YOUR BOYFRIEND WAS IN FOR SUCH a surprise when he came home from his shoot, the last thing he’d expect to open the door to — you and a baby.
You were doing Faith a massive favour. Her and Ethan were down to their last resorts looking for a last-minute babysitter, and you and your boyfriend were the first choice out of the six they had to choose from. In all honesty, Behz would have rated Simon quite low among his group of boys, but knowing you would be there and hopefully doing most of the looking after, he had a much relaxed aroma on his way to your house with Olive.
You were average with babies, you didn’t want to brag because you knew every baby was different, but you liked to think you were good enough. And Olive was a good baby: she was easily entertained and not as much of a hassle to actually care for. The biggest thing you had to worry about was assembling the pram in and out of the car.
“Here he comes!” You cheered, standing in the hallway as you watched Simon’s car pull up.
The lock rattled and the handle pulled down, and as he wiped his feet on the carpet, the baby let out a giggly sound, grabbing his attention immediately. Simon froze.
“Ummm . . what?”
“Look who’s come to stay with her favourite Auntie and Uncle!!!”
“Is that Olive?” He smiled, shutting the door behind him.
“Sure is!”
“Where’s her mum and dad? Is that why Ethan missed my shoot?!”
“They have a birthday party. Don’t worry, they said they should be back before 11:00. If not, I offered to keep her the night.”
“YOU WHAT?”
“What?! I wanted them to go out and enjoy themselves!”
“Should’ve thought about that before they had a kid.”
“Simon,” you gave him a look, bouncing Olive in your arms. “Look at her! She’s the sweetest ever! She’ll be so good!”
He looked at Olive, trying not to smile, but he couldn't help it. She was such a cute baby and he was intrigued to see how the day would go watching her. “Did she tell you that?”
You looked at him. “Shut up. Sit down and hold her for me,” you guided him to your newly built kitchen, pulling a seat out with your foot as he nervously took a seat.
You placed her carefully in his arms, guiding his hands to hold her little body properly and comfortably. She was still only a couple months old. You told him to relax as he felt tense, your heart swelling at the sight and already making you broody. You laughed at his state and tended to the kettle where you’d just boiled some water for her bottle. “We’ll feed her, get her changed and maybe take her out somewhere? If you want?”
“Hm, sure,” Simon was oblivious when it came to babies, at least in the caring part. He just about knew how to talk to them, and that was only because he’d seen how his Mum had talked to one like she talked to their dog.
Adding the scoops to the water, you brought the bottle in and sat down next to him, your head on his shoulder, looking down at the questioning baby. “My heart explodes looking at her.”
“I feel like I'm looking at a mini Behz,” he laughed, looking at you to see if you agreed. You did. She was his double. But you could see Faith in her too — maybe it was her eyes, or her little button nose.
You buttoned on her bib, took her from him and placed her comfortably in your hold before giving her bottle, besotted by how content she was once she was being fed, eyes closing almost blissfully in that weren’t staring up at you. You pulled her closer in a slight squeeze, “I love her sooo much,” you hugged her little body to yours. You wanted to keep her forever.
Simon watched, a little besotted himself, seeing how easy you took to it — better than him anyway, but a reassuring sight it was. Simon took a picture and sent it to his Mum, knowing it would set her off but captioned it in a sick joke ‘cause he was a mean son — ‘surprise! you’re finally a granny!’
Simon didn’t know how, but his plans to go film a quick couple videos for the channel had suddenly been rescheduled for another time as you’d managed to force him into going a walk with you and Olive.
And not only that, but wearing the baby carrier.
“Does it feel secure?” You clipped in another buckle at his side, pulling it as tight as can be. You slipped Olive in the carrier, laughing at how cute he was in her little coat and hat, as well as your boyfriend’s face who was questioning Olive’s stare on him.
“What? What is it?” He asked her genuinely, voice a little pitched as if it was baby language, ans she just starred, a subtle smile appearing from behind her dummy at the attention. “Are you laughing at me? Or are you laughing at my beard? My pathetic excuse of a beard?”
Your heart was bursting out of your chest. “Tell him to shave his beard, Olive,” you grinned, smiling satisfied, she seemed happy enough in the carrier strapped to Simon’s chest.
“I don’t know how us walking about is supposed to tire her out,” he expressed, walking out the door, “i’m the one doing all the walking.” He wondered how ridiculous he looked, but at the same time, he laughed every time he looked down at Olive and found her big eyes already staring up at him.
“Oh shut up and stop complaining,” you quipped, locking the door before setting off on your stroll.
You walked around your new neighbourhood, familiarizing yourself with your surroundings, walking hand in hand. Many stopped to greet you and introduce themselves as the recognised you to be the new, lovely young couple who had bought the big house at the end of the road. “And who’s this?!” They awed, getting a sight of Baby O snoozing against Simon’s chest, his hoodie clearly as soft as her baby blanket back home.
“Oh, she’s not ours!” He panick laughed while you shook your head at his immediate shoot down.
“She’s our good friend’s little one, we’re just taking her for the night.”
“Goodness, she is the cutest.”
“Thank you! Her name is Olive.”
“Olive! How beautiful!”
You smiled more as your boyfriend struggled to think of what to say.
“None for you yet, then?” They joked. “That is a big house.”
You chuckled at that.
“Yeah, I think we’re gonna get the dog next, start from there,” he laughed, and you bidded your goodbye, a fan of the friendly neighbour.
You walked for a bit until heading back, Simon complaining he was tired after practically pulling an all-nighter from filming videos the night before to which you’d responded — “and who’s fault is that?”
You all got home, and sat in the living room to chill before dinner. Simon sprawled on the sofa whilst you played with Olive on the floor, joining her on the baby mat and showing her every toy that she’d brought from home. She loved the attention.
Simon felt odd watching you interact with her so well, it was kind of unnerving, but undeniably wholesome at the same time — you were acing this shit.
“Ok but . . imagine we did have a kid.”
Your head shot to him, flabbergasted. “I’m sorry?!”
Simon laughed at your response. “No but I mean — like . . I mean, if Behz can do it, we can clearly do it, right?”
“Yeah. Of course!”
“It’s not so bad.”
“No. And our kid will be different so we’ll probably understand them better as well,” you added, tickling a giggling Olive’s cheek with her fluffy bunny rabbit.
“ . . d’you think they’ll look like me? D’you think they’ll be cute?”
You smiled adoringly at his questions. “Yes. I’m sure they will look like you Simon. They’ll have the same blue eyes as Olive but be much, much taller,” you raised your brows, thinking back to his baby pictures. Of course they would be cute. “And I’ll be taking and picking them up from football practice like the soccer mom I was destined to be in my Range Rover.”
Simon laughed and clapped at that, although the idea of that had his heart skipping.
He was on board with that.
When it was time to start dinner, you’d tried to hand over the babygirl to your boyfriend — keyword: tried. She withheld — clinging to your shirt and cuddling further into you, a clear instigation she wanted to stay with you. “Go on! It’s Simon! Uncle Simon!” You swayed with her, and although she didn’t shy away — it was like she still knew he was yet to warm to her, as she was with him. “Olive.” You couldn't even hide your pride — you kept her attached to you, you loved her want for you, letting her join you in the kitchen as you whipped up something quick.
Simon thought she was adorable, but once dinner was made, ate and dishes put away — he couldn’t help but work out just how long this baby was clung to you — not willing to give you up.
“Here we have the biggest hogger known to man—” he joined you both on the floor with his vlogging camera in hand. Olive was fascinated by the item in his hand. “I have not seen y/n in a solid two and a half hours because of you,” oh but her face was so cute and she was reaching for the camera, “do you want to say hello?” he heightened his voice - subconsciously doing the baby voice as he lowered it for her to grab, “say ‘what’s up!’”
Your heart melted, seeing them finally take to each other. “I’m gonna call this ‘BABYSITTING BABY BEHZ GONE WRONG!!!’ — see how many views that gets us,” he snickered, and you laughed at outloud, his immaturity never failing to amaze you. You already knew the thumbnail would be a baby doll laying on your stairs or sitting in your oven.
Simon switched out his camera for one of her toys and they began playing with them instead, and at the sight of Olive smiling and kicking her legs, you took to the kitchen to finish tidying away whatever you hadn’t been able to beforehand.
You sent photos to Faith and Ethan to let them know their baby was having the best time at their Aunt and Uncle’s, full of smiles and getting every bit of attention offered. Faith was screaming at the sight, shaking her boyfriend, “they’re turning into us! Our influence!” She joked, 5 drinks gone while Ethan laughed at her. You didn’t want to get ahead of yourself — you were with Simon on the idea of a dog or two first — but it was nice to know this was your forever home, and the home you’d be bringing your own little ones home to one day, to bring up.
“Erm . .” you heard a voice. “I think someone needs a nappy change.” You turned to find your man holding Olive a little out from him from the kitchen door, and your heart burst, and you laughed. “I’m afraid that is something out of my skill range.”
You took a kicking Olive again, smothering her cheeks in kisses and brought her to the livingroom to quickly change her, as well as some pyjamas as it neared the time for her last feed before bed.
“Here, I’ll go make her bottle,” you passed her back, and this time she let herself to go to Simon, the pair laying down on the sofa as she watched the TV from his chest.
You were a puddle.
You made the bottle and trotted back to the living room, only to be met with the cutest sight your ever did see: the pair both fast asleep on the couch, Olive snuggled up like a little cocooned caterpillar, sucking her dummy whilst your boyfriend almost snoozed away, his hands both on her little back, keeping her both secure and warm as they dozed off to the sound of the TV playing in the background. You took another set of photos.
You were so unbelievably proud to see him take so well to her, and it gave you a little bit of hope and excitement for the future. It didn’t seem so scary anymore. “Babe?”
Simon remembers his first-ever interactions with you. It was just a usual GTA game with his friends, but this time you were added as well. He did not think much of you at first and just enjoyed your comebacks when the other guys were tryna give you shit for being bad at the game.
The friendship between the two of you has always been mostly chill. When you both started living in the same house it took him a bit to get used to you, but that was inevitable and would be easily conquered with time.
One of Simon’s favorite things to do with you is to jokingly go after someone else with you. It is known that he is a bit evil. But when it comes to you most people remember your kindness rather than the same mischief you possess as well.
When the both of you start tearing at someone with those goddamn smart remarks there is no escape or a way of defense for the victim. There is always a shock in the person's eyes when you join Simon cause even though you have done it so many times they still find it surprising. And Si finds it extremely amusing.
The most often victim of the two of you would be JJ. There is a compilation on Youtube titled “Y/N and Simon gangbanging JJ for 16 minutes” that got too many views for that title alone.
The playful beef between the two of you is nice too. The both of you know each other well enough to be aware of what topics are off-limits and know that the other will not bring them up. It is just pure fun, such a comforting simple joy to have in your life with your dear friend.
It has also become a habit to gently annoy each other physically. So whilst Simon pinches your sides or tickles you, you flick the back of his head or rough up his hair a bit.
Little poking battles will occur even when you tell him that he should stop this kind of behavior since he is soooo old now. But Simon knows well you do not mean it and pokes you twice for calling him old.
Simon was glad that you got along with Talia until you and her started teasing him together just like you and he did to others. He was betrayed and needed some time to recover /hj.
He is very supportive of you. Encouraging your ideas and goals. Congratulating you on your milestones and accomplishments.
The two of you would sometimes go on late-night drives. They had no strong purpose, just to rest your minds from making content and editing. Every so often you would capture him in his driving glasses on camera knowing that it will drive the fangirls crazy.
You also helped him with being a good boyfriend sometimes. He was not doing badly on his own, but you would sometimes give small pieces of advice in aspects where he was a bit clueless. He just needed some assurance as well lol.
So many cameos in each other’s vlogs. Mostly just fooling around or randomly jumping in the frame.
'Subscribe to Miniminter on youtube.'
'Don't, go leave a dislike instead'
'HEY!'
When you were younger you used him for his age. He got you energy drinks (no alcohol promotion on this blog) and one time he accompanied you to get a piercing which you were oh-so thankful for.
It was a condition that a parent had to be present, but you convinced the person that would do the piercing that any adult would do since you’re parents were far away. Josh and Tobi both said you were too young, but the third time was a charm and Simon agreed.
When they were getting it done Simon held your hand, but also laughed at you on the same time.
Dying his hair some kind of crazy color for a video, only for the color to not exactly fit him. (Atleast the color is even because you applied the dye instead of him-)
You have so many nice memories with the guy. Like the other brother/the brother you never had.
Hope you liked these headcanons and that you have a sunny day or night 🌤!!
Words: 655
Summary: He was always filled with dread when having to meet any boy that his daughter brought home, but little did he know that this one would be different when his daughter brings home Simon Minter, his favorite football player.
Masterlist | Support Me!
The older man sighed, resting back in his chair as he eyed the clock. The time was drawing near and nearer and every minute that passed dread grew inside of him. He had hated the first time his little girl had brought home a boy, even if it was their next door neighbor and they were only ten, and at seventeen the hatred was joined with dread when she brought home her first boyfriend. And now she was bringing home a boyfriend for the first time in years, one that neither he or her mother knew the name of and it was just days before the season started. Dread wasn’t supposed to sit heavy in his stomach in August. Excitement should be brewing as the days grew closer to the first match of the season.
He grumbles as another minute ticks by and he can’t help but wish he had a pint. It would help a little bit. He glances at his wife and can’t help but smile at the way she’s fluttering about, clearly excited to meet their daughter's boyfriend. He took pleasure in the fact that if it went badly she’d join him in a drink. Always one to have a drink after a shit experience, his wife.
A knock makes her pause her adjusting of the throw pillows, standing straight with a bright smile. “They must be early!”
He sighs at the excitement in her voice and casts a longing look at the tv, where he had been about to watch some highlights from last season. Last season had been an amazing one, his favorite player since he’d joined Leeds had been above and beyond, a season to remember and he could only hope that he performed just as well if not better this season.
Standing, he follows his wife from the living room to the front door that opens with a swing. Immediately enveloping their daughter in her arms. “It’s so good to see you, sweetheart.”
She smiles, hugging her mom back. “It’s good to see you too, I’m sorry it’s been so long.” She looks at both of them before stepping into her dad’s arms for a hug.
He holds her close, his only child, his daughter, his little girl. “Don’t worry about it, we’ve been busy and so have you, it happens.” He tells her when they’ve let go.
“Still,” she insists, but seeing the look on his face stops her from saying anything else. She glances behind her at the door that’s still open and the smile that immediately takes over her face reminds him of why exactly she’s visiting and his fingers twitch at how brightly she’s smiling.
She looks back at them, smile still on her face but a little softer. “Mom, dad, I want you to meet Simon, my boyfriend.” She says, as she extends a hand out to grab her boyfriend's hand and pulls him inside.
He’s about to extend a hand, greet him, knowing if he doesn’t he’ll get an elbow to the ribs. But his mouth falls open and he’s unable to move a muscle as he gets his first look of his daughters boyfriend.
It was Him.
Number seven for Leeds United. His favorite player. Simon Minter. Miniminter. His daughter was dating Miniminter. Her boyfriend was Miniminter. His mouth closes and his hand goes out, when an elbow hits his side, shaking him from his shock. And he can’t help the smile on his face as he greets the footballer enthusiastically. The dread that had been sitting in his stomach was gone, excitement only there.
Miniminter was a good lad, had his own non-profit, liked meeting with fans from what he saw on twitter and such, and in his whole career had never had any horrible accusations come against him like other footballers. He still wasn’t good enough for his little girl, but he was probably the closest anyone could get.
“I’ll show you every version of yourself tonight.”
summary: mona pays for a cheap rent and in return she gets a pair of menaces for roommates + mona hooks up with someone and finds a designer tshirt that she doesn’t own.
notes: no personal/romantic relationships are involved in this SMAU. the most personal that it could get would be the stuff that goes on from the videos that content creators made for the past few years. also, this is not proofread. english ≠ first language so it’ll be a ride.
characters involved: platonic!sidemen, zerkaa, mentions of stephentries, willne, calfreezy. roommates!w2s and calfreezy.
content warning: allusions to smut, explicit language, a whole of confusion basically because I’m posting what I kept in wattpad. it may be confusing but uh… yeah! this is literally a shitpost as of this point
monalisabal posted a photo !
♡ liked by calfreezy, wroetoshaw and 123 others
monalisabal “you’re lucky for scoring a cheap rent in london” this is the state of my fridge and toilet atm.
view 2 more comments
wroetoshaw i’m sorry mon
monalisabal you’re really not.
calfreezy this is the best that i can offer
monalisabal i’ve always lived for disappointment anyways.
monaaaaa / monabal4 tweeted:
godbless callum and harold but at the same time are they really sent by god or the demon himself? they just barked at me after returning from my meeting.
monaaaaa / monabal4 tweeted:
hooked up with someone the night before. he was amazing. not gonna lie, there’s no need for him to leave something so expensive though— a balenciaga shirt, mayhaps?
monaaaaa / monabal4 tweeted:
if he tends to forget things like this, i could just apologize for the amount of things that he’d forget when sleeping with other ppl :/
monaaaaa / monabal4 tweeted:
my roomies just asked if i want to get involved in a video with them. they’d pay me for it. are they talking about 🌽? i honestly just want to meet their friends tbfh— what if it’s actually a casting couch?
monaaaaa / monabal4 tweeted:
i only agreed because they’re paying. harry did tell me that he asked because i’m “hot and funny.” he also told me that he only sees me like a sister before all of that. so that’s kinda… wrong don’t you think?
This is inspired by an idea from the lovely @simp4sidemen, I hope I did your idea justice 🥰
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Simon Minter x Fem!Reader
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please check my masterlist to see if requests are open
The ring sat heavy on your finger. It had, after all, only been 2 months since Simon had presented you with the promise ring.
After a beautiful date at a rooftop bar by the Thames, he’d pulled out a black velvet box, opened it and slid it across the table to you. “Is this what I think it is?”, you asked hesitantly.
“No”, Simon chuckled at the nervousness in your voice. “No, it’s not that. It’s a promise ring”, he told you, gently, nervously.
“Oh”, you were speechless, something that didn't usually happen around Simon, people usually couldn't get a word in edgeways around the two of you.
“It’s a promise that one day it will be what you thought it was. Its a promise that I’ll love you for as long as you’ll keep me. It’s a promise of me, to you, for you”, he said, fingers fidgeting over the box lid as his eyes held yours.
Tears sprung to your eyes and you quickly reached up to stop their flow. “Shit, I didn't mean to make you cry”, Simon panicked.
“No, no!”, you rushed out. “It’s not like that, that was just really beautiful and so is the ring and so was tonight. You just caught me really off guard”, you told him through your watery laugh. Simon instantly relaxed into his chair, relieved.
“Can I?”, he asked, nodding towards your hand. You nodded, and he reached over, picking up your right hand and slipping the ring onto your ring finger. “Perfect fit”, he smiled.
“Everything okay?”, Simon’s voice asked, pulling you out of your trance. You looked up to him, smiling softly.
“Of course”, you told him simply. “Can I wear this today?”, you asked, holding up one of his black Sidemen Clothing hoodies.
“Of course”, he repeated, a smirk dancing across his face. You huffed at him, throwing your night shirt, the shirt Simon had taken off when he got into bed the night before, at him as you got dressed. “You can’t throw my own clothes at me as an insult, Y/N. It just doesn't work like that”, Simon laughed.
“It just doesn’t work like that”, you mocked in a high pitched, whiny voice as you pulled your head through the neck of the hoodie, careful not to get any make up on it. Simon laughed at you, picking up one of the countless decorative cushions you'd plagued his room with, hurling it at your thigh. “Truce!”, you called, throwing your hands in the air to surrender, already knowing you wouldn’t win in a play-fight with Mr. Lanky-Long-Limbs in the corner.
You followed Simon out of the bedroom, down to the parking garage of the apartment building and into the car. “Are you sure we’re a team, yeah?”, you asked him.
Simon had roped you in to the Sidemen’s second parenting video. There was no host this time, just 4 teams trying not to kill a plastic, robotic doll in the streets of London. You’d agreed, of course, but only if you’d be paired with Simon. You’d throw the baby at JJ’s head in the first hour, guaranteed, and you weren’t here to lose.
“Yeah, and if not, I’ll just swap with whoever you’ve ended up paired up with”, Simon smiled simply, turning his eyes back to the road. The rest of the car journey was a comfortable silence, filled only by the sounds of your joint Spotify playlist running through the speakers. Simon’s hand rested on your thigh as he drove through the streets of London, occasionally mindlessly drumming along with the music as you waited in traffic.
Once you’d pulled up to Vik’s apartment, Simon parked the car. He squeezed your thigh softly before unbuckling his seatbelt. “Are you sure you’re okay?”, he asked you, voice tinged with worry.
“Yeah, I promise, Si. I just have a lot on my mind at the moment”, you told him honestly. His worry didn't subside, if anything it only got worse.
“You know you can tell me anything, right?”, he took ahold of your hand, his fingers running over the band resting on your finger. “You know I’m always gonna be here for you?”.
“I know, Si. I promise I’m okay. We can talk about it later, yeah?”, you told him, twisting your fingers to wrap them around his and hold his hand properly. “I love you”, you reminded him, leaning over to kiss him. “Now, come on, let’s go get a baby”.
Two hours later, you and Simon were strolling through a baby shop, looking for an outfit for your new child. “Y/N! Look how cute this is!”, Simon yelped, holding onto a tiny grey onesie that had ‘I love my Daddy’ written across it. “I think Petunia needs this”, he told you seriously.
“No, Petunia needs an outfit fit for a little lady. She wouldn’t be caught dead in grey, Simon. Gosh, do you not know your own daughter!”, you laughed, leading him over to the aisle that held clothes better suited to the size of your doll.
“Is it something you ever think about?”, Simon asked you, sifting through the little pink dresses in front of him. “Us, I mean... Having one”.
“I do, yeah”, you smiled up at him, leaning into his side. “Do you?”, you asked him, chewing on your lip. Simon’s brow furrowed.
“I do. I know you’ll make a great mum. I mean, if you can look after me and JJ drunk, you can do anything. I just... I don’t think I’d be a good dad”, he sighed, hand stilling on the flowery dresses.
“Why?”, you asked him, tilting your head up to look at him. “The fact that you worry you wouldn’t be a good father already shows that you care. Nobody knows how to be a parent until they have to, Si”, you told him softly, slipping your arm around his waist to rest your hand on his hip. “I think you’d make a great dad”, you smiled.
“Really?”, he asked you, eyes lighting up as he looked down to your face.
“Yeah, I mean look how much effort you put into youtube and streaming and fan interaction. That alone shows you can commit to looking after something. Yeah, its different than like... a whole baby... but in the last 9 years, you’ve never given up on it”.
Simon didn’t say anything after that, just wrapped his arms around you and held you close to his chest, dropping a kiss to the top of your head, before you moved on to find Petunia some shoes.
“Y/N, she won’t stop crying”, Simon stressed. The two of you were finished in the baby shop, getting ready to make your way over to the tills to pay, when Petunia decided that it was time for all hell to break loose. “What do I do?”, he panicked.
“You go outside with her and feed her and I’ll get this”, you told him, handing the nappy bag containing all of Petunia’s belongings over to Simon.
-
You were quite sure that the footage of yours, Simon’s and Petunia’s day would be positively, mind-bogglingly boring. It turns out that the one pair that actually function as a couple 24/7 make a really good team, who’d have guessed it?
Back at Vik’s apartment, the student cards were sorted out so you could see how well you’d all performed in parenting. It was no surprise when Harry and JJ’s baby came last, given that it returned to Vik’s missing an arm, a few toes and an eye. Ethan and Vik came next, somehow managing to shut the baby off 20 minutes into their day so there was barely any information to even report back. Josh and Tobi’s baby had survived, albeit a bit hungry and tired. But Petunia... yours and Simon’s little lady had come out on top.
“Oh, I’m so proud of Petunia”, you and Simon had gushed, like real proud parents. You showed the boys the picture of Simon asleep on the sofa, Petunia’s hand grasped tightly in yours.
“You didn’t have to show them that”, he huffed, nudging your side.
As Vik retired the babies to a spare-room, the rest of the guys set to ordering take out. “Who wants a drink?”, Vik asked as he walked back into the living room and kitchen area. A chorus followed, all reeling off several alcoholic beverages.
“I’ll just have lemonade”, you told him with a smile. After managing to convince Vik that, yes, you were sure you only wanted lemonade, you went and sat back down with Simon.
“I got you something today”, you told him once all the guys had got their drinks and found a seat. “Here”, you told him, handing him over a small gift box.
“What’s this for?”, Simon asked, turning the box over gently in his hands.
“Just open it”, you told him.
Simon pulled the lid off of the box. His jaw dropped. “You’re...”, he trailed off.
Inside the box lay two positive pregnancy tests and the tiny onesie he’d shown you earlier on in the day.
“I found out last week, I didn’t want to tell you until I’d been to the doctors and checked properly”, you told him.
“Oi, what is it?”, JJ asked loudly. Simon’s only response was to hold up the little outfit to show the guys. “I’m gonna be an uncle?”, JJ asked, a lot softer this time. His face had split into a grin, as had the rest of the guys.
“Y/N’s pregnant”, Simon said softly, as if he was trying to convince himself. He looked over at you, and then down to the baggy fabric of his hoodie over your stomach. “Can I?”, he asked.
“Of course. It’s your baby, Si”, you chuckled happily. He reached out a hand, laying it gently over your side. “Are you okay?”, you asked him gently.
“Vik, can we borrow the balcony?”, Simon asked, turning his head to face his friend but not letting his hand leave your body. Vik nodded quickly, pointing in the rough direction of the door since he already knew that you and Simon knew the way.
“Should I not have told you in front of everyone?”, you asked quietly. Instead of saying anything, though, Simon dropped down to his knees in front of you, letting his large hands cradle your sides. He dropped a kiss to stomach, just below your bellybutton, and you instantly felt better.
hello friends!!! just letting everyone know i am back!! i really want to get back into writing and i have so much inspiration for the sidemen!! If y'all have any requests or ideas, send them my way!! i would be more than willing to write for y'all again. i miss you <3
