#mixdemeanor

[nerves-nebula]

coming up with reasons for my characters to not have extended families or even immediate families is always fun . yeah their parents uhhh (spins wheel) died. because of (spins wheel) a flood. and The Character wasn't there for the flood cuz they were (spins wheel) 10 years old at a summer camp

[nerves-nebula]

asked my fiance which of my characters had the most wholesome romantic relationship and she said THE INCESTUOUSLY ENMESHED BROTHERS FROM THE VIDEO GAME IDEA I HAD AS A TEEN????? i know pickings are slim but i didnt think ti was THAT bad sobb

[nerves-nebula]

i haven't thought about Fella this much in a longggg time. 13 year old and their razor sharp whip-sword <3 about to spend summer break solving all their friends problems with the power of love and violence, before their uncle makes them move away

[nerves-nebula]

the other main thing about mixdemeanor was that you can always choose to do something else. like. you can Just Stop hitting your kids. there's no amount of abuse that means you should just sunk cost fallacy it the rest of ur life. nothing is irredeemable because redemption isn’t real and doesn’t matter. you are immediately a better person every time you don't hit your kid. hughie could always choose to stop being a piece of shit. you are in control of the amount of children you're taking your frustration out on.

also i keep switching between calling him huey and hughie and idk why but im gonna have to pick one for his character tag

or i could just tag him as H M (huey mixdemeanor)

[nerves-nebula]

when i was like 13-15 i made a story about a bunch of abused kids and there was a fantasy mirror reality and the kids parents would either be Caregivers or Caretaekrs depending on if they were abusive and shitty or not and thats like really on the nose but i still love it and i will still use it in the future if i ever get around to making this storyrrr. i want. card based fighting system. i like cards.

[nerves-nebula]

DEEP LORE from me ! the one on the left used to be my Most Drawn OC ever, for like, multiple years. their name is Fella and they're my first ever nonbinary character. the one on the right is Clark. Fella's whole deal is that they're always sticking their nose in their friends business, eventually "defeating" their abusers on a quest to get strong enough to "defeat" their own

[nerves-nebula]

when i was 13 i started writing a story about all kinds of child abuse and in it there was this group of kids who had a little scrap metal shed they'd set up in the woods that they could retreat to whenever their home lives got to be too much. I called them the Shed Kids and they weren't always nice to each other haha.

anyway two of the shed kids were these teenage boys who were neglected/abused by their mother and had an incredibly codependent and explicitly incestuous relationship with each other. One of them was really aggressive and protected the other, who felt like he was really weak and useless a lot of the time because he was kind of typecast as the Cute Soft one. this is because i had a normal childhood and this dynamic is not based on anything that happened in my life (lying)

fr though its fascinating in retrospect how close that dynamic is to a real world one and i didn't even realize it when i was writing it. Like i was aware of a lot of the abuse ii was suffering at the time and i still didn't realize that this specific dynamic was something i was drawing from my childhood.

idk i just started thinking about them again. i spent a lot of time on their story in the past but it's been a while. Clark was also part of their story too, it was where i developed him for the most part.

[nerves-nebula]

Developed an idea for a game when I was younger that was basically just a kid going around metaphorically killing all their friends abusive family with magic from another dimension in order to level up enough to face their own abusive uncle. The protagonist was the first nonbinary character I’d ever made.