[I suppose I can host this on another server that can calculate the responses, but for now, you’ll have to use paper and pencil, or total your scores on a calculator (gasp!).]
Rate the validity of the statements on a scale from zero percent, being the lowest, to one hundred percent, being the highest. Average the scores at the end of the test, meaning that you add up the responses from all the numbers, and divide that number by the total questions, or _____. If you feel yourself unable to answer any of the questions below, skip it and do not include it in the average.
1. As a passenger, I fall asleep in vehicles often.
2. I have had chicken pox as a child, and later I have had brittle teeth and sebaceous cysts from adolescence onward.
3. There are times I feel jittery, as if there is some mild electrocution happening (also called “jelly legs”), causing my limbs to rattle or feet to tap.
4. I hear the songs “Happy Birthday,” “Greensleeves,” or “Hallelujah” more often than I should, and they make me feel very uncomfortable.
5. I have done things in my sleep that I cannot consciously remember, such as having conversations, walking around, or even attacking others.
6. I have had experiences where forced speech seems necessary, and have a tendency to blurt things out more often than others.
7. Close relationships often form in my life and are dissolved very quickly, with those people leaving a trivial trail of contact behind them or no trail whatsoever.
8. As a child, my pets kept dying or going missing.
9. I have had many experiences which felt paranormal or unworldly.
10. I experience moments of forgetfulness, such as going to begin a task and then suddenly forgetting what it was you were about to do. Sometimes I will lose track of parts of days or even entire days.
11. As a child, my household setting contained an unusually high number of the following items: Disney memorabilia (e.g. Mickey Mouse ears), clocks, hourglasses, dollhouses, birdhouses, feeders, or baths, dolls and/or stuffed animals, game trophies, floor tile or wallpaper containing checkerboard patterns or “opposite” sets of colors like blue-red, yellow-green, et cetera.
12. I have close family contact with the military, federal agencies, and/or orphanhood/social workers.
13. As a child, I had a pronounced phobia of: clowns, midgets, clones, and/or robots. For instance, if I saw one in a movie, I would cease watching it immediately, or demand that the channel be switched or the movie be fast-forwarded.
14. I find myself unusually emotionally invested in current media, such as the daily news, music and/or fashion trends.
15. I often hear quotes directed specifically at me from the following books: The Wizard of Oz, Alice in Wonderland, or the Bible.
16. I feel like things always go terribly wrong whenever I’m around, as if I’m cursed or that there is some huge conspiracy of sabotage surrounding my life.
17. I have round, flat scars on my body, or I have scars that only appear under blacklight on my face and/or hands.
18. I have always found myself shunned for one reason or another, ranging from extraordinary, unbelievable reasons (being a witch or being brain damaged) to reasons that others pretended to believe but I knew to be false (being gay, being a criminal, etc.).
[That’s all for now, but this is a work in progress. This is the one test I have written in my life where I can say with total honesty and sincerity, that I hope you all fail. If you are concerned about your results, start reading now, beginning with Cisco Wheeler's How Help Comes About.]
