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Stories From Alternate Universes: Yandere!Seokjin

To understand the storyline of Dr Gertrude, please read the Stories From Alternate Universes; BTS Version (headcannon masterlist).

To understand the Yandere storyline, please read the Seven Yandere Stories From An Alternate Universe (Yandere!BTS headcannon masterlist)

Warnings: yandere behaviour, mental health issues, narcissism, swearing, stalking, brainwashing, violence, sexual harassment (kissing), emotional/verbal abuse, fear/threat of violence, cliffhanger

Word count: 4k+ (not including Doctor’s Notes)

A/N: This one hits slightly close to home, since there are traits which stem from some people I used to know. Dealing with a narcissist (especially in the romantic aspect or as family) is scary business and certainly no joke--it often feels like a trap you can’t escape from, especially since you don’t really know what’s happening until a good deal of damage is done and leaving is hard. Though I can’t really give much advise from a personal perspective, I can definitely recommend you watch Dr Ramani on YouTube. Her videos have helped those in my life who have dealt with narcissists so I suggest you have a look through. I am in no way romanticising toxic and yandere behaviour that is shown. Please, don’t treat people this way and if you find yourself stuck in something like this, the first step is telling someone you trust--someone who cares for your long-term happiness.

Doctor’s Notes:

Out of my seven case studies, Kim Seokjin is one of two people who will isolate his victim, a trait that stems from his delusional mind. A few notable behaviours and characteristics while studying him are as follows:

He wants his victim to himself, no one else, and does this not necessarily through violence, but through repetition of thoughts and beliefs

Faces many insecurities, so will push them onto his victim to make them believe they have these insecurities instead

To cure said ‘insecurities’ in his victim, I found that he believes only he can--in a sense--’purify’ them with what he believes is love

In an attempt to get closer to the victim, he will begin to alter their memories through constant repetition--effectively brainwashing which has very negative side-effects

This previous point is so that the victim begins to change their actions and thoughts, making it much easier for them to integrate into his life--where he believes he can keep them forever

Brainwashing, although is mainly used on his victim, is used on himself as well--from what I have observed, it acts like a coping mechanism of sorts

Self-brainwashing includes removing violent memories, memories of rejection, or any other memories that bring about unpleasant emotions

Believes his victims are more deluded than he is, and attempts to ‘save’ them by keeping them away from any outside influence

Appointed Nickname: The Mad

For more detailed information of His Story, continue reading

His Story:

Since he was a child, Seokjin was gifted with beauty. He looked good no matter what he was doing, what pose he pulled, and the ease that came with it meant that he was more drawn towards modelling.

Sure, on his rise to fame, his ever-growing ego had a feast from all the compliments but all things must crumble under the watchful gaze and scrutinising remarks of strangers. What was he to do? Listen and destroy himself or ignore it?

Obviously, the pride in him cooed the kindest words, bandaged up his wounds like a mother would. He needed no one but himself--listened to no one but himself.

And maybe his agent on occasions.

But mainly himself.

Then along came you.

Lazy, laid-back, dressed-in-rags you.

A stand-in for the photographer who had a last-minute family emergency. Something about his wife being in labour...? But who cares. It was Seokjin’s shoot so he wasn’t happy with getting anything less than perfection.

Simply the idea of a stand-in sent alarms off in his head, that you were sub-par and wouldn’t do his unblemished skin and glorious bone structure the justice it deserves.

He gave you hell for it. Sneering at you the moment the lens was pointing anywhere but him, stealing your coffee cups, barging into you intentionally--hard enough to make you lose your footing but not enough to knock you over.

It was never enough to knock you over.

Why wouldn’t you just knock over?

The few agonising days of shooting were over, and you sent the pictures to his agent to be approved of before you officially sent them over to whatever magazine he was starring in. You didn’t care enough to ask, wanting him and his business to be the past so you could continue your free-lance photography.

Of which Seokjin found out about, of course. Funny what a quick Google search of your name could do. It added to why he was so unpleased with you. But once he saw what your magical camera did to him, he was... slightly impressed.

How your particular lens could make him look even more ethereal, bring out more of his natural beauty than any other, he couldn’t understand what set you apart out from everyone else.

He got his agent to pull a few strings to find out where you came from--why you were the stand-in. Turns out, you were just helping out the original photographer as an old friend of his. And for that exact reason, he saw you again with that God-given camera of yours.

Some pretentious gala for New Years, where all the celebs would mingle and pretend they didn’t just make a sarcastic jab at whoever they were speaking to.

And there you were again. Still had those bags under your eyes. Still had that disinterested stare that never seemed to focus on anything. Still dressed in those tattered-looking clothes that look like they were made at least a decade ago.

Eventually, when he was ready, he made his way over to you, thinking he could perhaps... fix you?

The closer he got, the more potential he realised you had. Just covered in too many flaws.

But despite his generosity of gracing you with his presence, you didn’t seem to care. In fact, you were almost irritated by it. Now that kind of disrespect just won’t do. And why would you act in such a way? It’s not like he’s done anything bad to you--not anything he can remember at the moment...

So he does his best to trap you with him for the next shoot--and he is very much successful in that. This time, he asked less people to be there so he could have more privacy to verbally dissect you with his questions. Some general, some more in-depth. All of which you reply with simplicity, not giving away too much while you were just trying to do your damn job.

But there were some things he could go off of (our social media didn’t give much away either since it was all about your work). Single child, self-employed with a few side-gigs here and there, owner of two cats--now that he could possibly use since he has a cat of his own.

And that was it. The cat.

He showed a few pictures of his darling little Siamese, Reggie, and there it was--the slightly wider eyes, more focused gaze, slightly titled head as he showed more pictures.

Standing there so close to him gave him the opportunity to catch your faint scent. Like fresh rain and forest berries. Only, you moved away too quickly for him to revel any longer than a mere second. Too short to savour something so addictive--something he caught his thoughts drifting off to that night, replaying the same scene in his head over and over and over again.

How could he lock away that memory, preserve it like a flower encased in ice, without it fading? How could he keep smelling that scent without it fading away?

The thought of never smelling that beautiful scent the moment he woke up, the moment he slept, every moment he breathed--that broke something in him. He had to have you.

Besides, why wouldn’t you accept his proposal? He was your saviour, the person who could bring out the best in you and banish those flaws surrounding you. It was a win-win.

For the next few months, Seokjin orchestrated meetings between you, some though his agent in the form of more shoots (you couldn’t really say no since the pay couldn’t hurt even if spending time with him mentally did) and some though “coincidences” like ‘bumping’ into your go-to supermarket or closest park to your apartment or favourite café.

Private investigators are truly a God-send.

In the beginning, you were more than uncomfortable seeing him around so much to the point you began to avoid those places. Tut tut tut, did you really think it was that easy to get rid of him? He was still confused as to why you were so unnerved by his friendliness, no longer remembering how he treated you when you first met.

The more you tried to avoid him, the more you saw him, until you were exhausted to the point of accepting your current situation. Yes, it’s weird having Seokjin being there every time you decide to leave your house, but this was getting ridiculous and despite your love for sleep, you were getting sick and tired of being locked up in the house and spending money on petrol to hid around town.

So, the two of you became friends. Or that’s what Seokjin believed while you were simply humouring him until he gets bored and leaves you alone. It’s not like you were unaware of his strange fascination with you, but you’ve dealt with worse figures and he seemed harmless.

How wrong you were...

He pointed things out about you like the acne on your skin (it was just a spot on your cheek) and the worn-out fabric of your clothes despite the cold (you felt warm when you left the house that day), and though you often got annoyed at him pointing out and exaggerating things about you, it was admittedly nice how he gifted you things to help with it. A man who’s occupation required him to look good, he used all the best products and wore expensive brands, so his gifts were actually helpful.

However, it did take a while for you to be completely comfortable with accepting such expensive things, but one thing you had learned about Seokjin is that he was nothing if not relentless.

As time passed, you grew to accept his criticisms and help since they had actually seemed to be true. Yes, he was still as clingy as ever, but some sense of compassion within you grew for the man. He seemed so alone, maybe he just needed a friend.

That was your theory, until he asked you on a date.

Food lodged in your throat, your fist pounding at your chest to get some air into it. “Sorry, what?” you coughed.

Seokjin frowned at the brash way you hit your body--choking or not, you should at least have a bit more grace than that. But more so than that, he was upset of you initial reaction to his statement. “Ready for our date tonight?”

“What?” The corner of your lips quirked up a little, brows furrowed to show exactly how perplexed you were without being unkind. “Could you repeat that?”

His head tilted to the side, looking confused. “Why should I? You said you were free last week and could do tonight.”

Eyes narrowing, you wracked your brain for any memory of the sort. “No, I don’t think I said that last week. Hell, you didn’t even ask me out last week.” You kept your voice low, afraid of any passer-bys eavesdropping on your conversation.

The two of you were sat on a random bench in your favourite park, your daily walks were now accompanied by him ever since he started popping up several months ago. Deciding it was time to take a break, Seokjin found the most ‘appropriate’ bench under the shade of a rather tall oak and tugged you along. He sprung that question on you while you were mid-granola bar.

“Yes, I did. It was Tuesday, we just finished up at our shoot--you had that beige jacket I bought you in one hand and a vanilla latte in the other--and I asked you when I walked you to your car. I remember it as clear as day.” His eyes looked hurt as he said, “don’t tell me you forgot.”

“Uh...” You tried to think back to that day, no longer surprised by his detailed recollection since you were used to his freakishly good memory by now. But you could barely remember that evening, nevermind a conversation you had when the only thing on your mind was a nap, but you doubted you would’ve agreed to it anyway. “Sorry, Seokjin, but I don’t recall you ever asking me that. I... I must’ve been frazzled or... something.”

He sighed, clearly disappointed in you--and although he was a great actor, he didn’t seem like he was faking this at all. Because in his mind, that conversation really did happen--even if it didn’t. He couldn’t ask you with the risk of rejection, so his brain simply overwrote what happened that day as a... coping mechanism of sorts. You, however, weren’t aware of this--how could you be?

“What should I do now? Booked the reservation and everything...” he muttered, eyes fixed in this hands which twiddled with the hem of his sweater. It was a sign of discomfort and vulnerability you weren’t familiar with, so this display had rattled you a little.

In a rush to try to spare his feelings, you offered him something else. “Why don’t we still go? As friends?”

His sharp glance of sadness at your face told you it was the wrong thing to say. “Wouldn’t be the same. I had it all set up for date-date for you and I--not a friend-date. Nevermind...”

He moved to stand, acting as if your mere presence burned his heart so in a state of panic and guilt, you blurted out, “okay, we’ll treat it as a date-date!” His head spun fast enough to make you think it might fly clean off his shoulders. Catching on before he thought anything different, you added, “but only this once.”

“Again,” he stood up, ready to leave you to deal with the aftermath of whatever this conversation was, “you wouldn’t be putting any feeling into it so there isn’t a point...”

As you watched his form begin to retreat, your hand shot out to grab his wrist. “I’ll try... I can’t guarantee anything but I’ll try to see you in that way just this once--that’s all you can ask of me at this point.”

“... Deal.”

It was not just that once.

Seokjin certainly had a serpent's tongue on him, the ability to convince you to another ‘date-date’ came too easy for him for it to be human. The first date, he took you to a restaurant near a beach for a candle-lit dinner, ending the night with ice cream and a walk in the moonlight. By now, you were used to his obvious displays of wealth yet the nature of this had you more uncomfortable than the first time--as if he expected you to be impressed by how much money he made, as if he expected you to fall into his arms and love you because of it, just like everyone else had.

And yet, with each date he forced upon you, you grew more and more resistant to him, to this--whatever ‘this’ was.

Came up with ways to avoid meeting him after it got to a point where you were more than uneasy; he tried to kiss you on your fourth ‘date’, but you swerved out of the way just in time while using pandas in the zoo you were at as a distraction. Sometimes you were ill, sometimes you were busy with work. But with every excuse, he grew suspicious. In retaliation, he made it harder and harder to avoid him as he kept showing up at your house (how did he know where you lived?) and the places you were supposed to have worked, just to ‘check in’ and ‘see how things were going’.

You tried to brush it off as his usual clinginess, but there was a nagging thought at the back of your mind that suggested otherwise.

Then his normal comments about how you presented yourself grow more insulting the longer you avoided him. No longer about your skincare and clothes, but about how you trampled on his heart when all he has done his love you--and though you never particularly cared for how you were perceived by him, but his incessant verbal harassment was close to bringing you to your knees.

Hardly having the energy to fight back after facing such behaviour for a number for a number of months, you thought it would have been better just to give in. It’ll make him stop, right? And Seokjin did--he stopped for a bit, noting your complacency, so he rewarded you for it.

There’s a term for it, you were sure.

Love-bombing.

He showered you with gifts you no longer had the energy to refuse, kisses you no longer had the energy to dodge, affection you no longer had the energy to shield yourself again.

He kept saying that it wasn’t so bad now that you weren’t resisting, and the more he said it, the more you started to believe him too. Sure, you couldn’t breathe in this suffocated atmosphere that was Seokjin, but you weren’t tired anymore. You could reserve your energy for other things like work. You just had to accept he was there in your life forever.

There were, no doubt, blips here and there. Sides of the man you thought you knew surfacing once you had moved in with him (he wouldn’t let it go until you did, and you were so exhausted). You began to notice certain tendencies that often appear out-of-the-blue--throwing things, slamming doors, yelling out of nowhere. He’d never hit you, not when he loved your body almost as much as his own.

Yet, that was still not the reason you were so terrified of him.

It was his behaviour afterwards; as if at the flick of a switch, he pretended as if everything was alright after one of his ‘episodes’. In fact, you had begun to realise something--he never remembered he did anything. Either his memory was altered or wiped al together, like a hallucination or black-out.

“Tell me something, baby.”

Humming in response, your gaze moved from the crossword puzzle over to Seokjin. He had that clench in his jaw that told you nothing good, despite his lax body sat next to you on the sofa.

He turned his phone off, throwing it to the side haphazardly, and turned to you. “You love me, right?” he asked, hand rubbing up and down your thigh in a seemingly comforting gesture.

“Yes,” you recited, already used to this question popping up constantly and uttering the right answer to go with it. But the familiar churning of your gut told you that this wasn’t all.

“I’m the only person allowed to love you... right?”

“Right...”

“So tell me,” his tongue ran along his bottom lip, as if trying to smooth out the words before they left it, “why do you let that coworker of yours love you? Is my own not enough for you?”

The image of a fellow photographer that you were paired up with--Yeonjun, his name is--popped up in your head, since it was the only coworker you had. He was friendly and nice, not too bad of a person to work with on this collaborative project you were currently doing.

You had a faint idea this would come sooner or later, since Seokjin’s irrationality was something you were somewhat familiar in dealing with by this point. And yet, you still couldn’t fully believe he was really saying this. “What do you mean?”

“I think you know--what with all the side-glances he gives you and offering to hang out during breaks. Not to mention how he get’s a bit too touchy-feely.”

You were no idiot; Yeonjun’s affections for you were fairly obvious but so long as he didn’t cross any boundaries you were uncomfortable with. The most he ever did was hug you, even just a gentle nudge with his elbow when he made a joke (admittedly, he was funny). He acted as if you were friends, and any feelings he had beyond that was something he never burdened you with so you never said anything.

“He’s just being nice.”

“Nice is one way to put it.”

Sighing, you rolled your eyes to land back to the puzzle in front of you--already seeing this as a waste of time.

“Don’t do that--it’s rude,” he chastised you, fingers curling around your chin to rip your face towards him again. “Tell me, why do you let him?”

“His feelings are his own,” you said, lips slightly puckered with how he was holding you. “They’re not my responsibility...”

“So you like his affections?”

“No, that’s not what I--”

His fingers loosen from their grip as he stands, pacing in front of you. This was the build-up.

“That’s not what I mean,” you whisper. Already, you’re aware of the pattern, not wanting to make it worse despite the fact of how it escalates too fast for you to really do much damage control. First, the pacing. Then, the swearing. Next, the stillness. Last, the aggressive displays.

“What do you mean? If I was enough for you, then why do you let him be like that?!” His hands gesture around to add emphasis and there is always that involuntary fear that creeps up your throat.

“It’s not as if I can control how he feels...”

“But you can put an end to it so why haven’t you fucking done that already?!”

Your eyes squeeze shut briefly. The swearing.

“It’s not that simple--”

“The fuck it isn’t ‘simple’. Just tell the bastard to fuck off.”

“I’ll try my best.”

Seokjin’s body froze to a stop right in front of you. His large hands now tucked inside his grey sweatpants, his eyes don’t move from yours--unblinking, his chest not rising and falling with breath. The stillness.

“Your ‘best’,” he sneers, voice cold and detached, “isn’t good enough. It’s never good enough.” He leans closer, thumb brushing against your flushed cheek while you try to prevent the bile burning your throat from coming up even more.

Moments pass, and he takes a few steps back. Gives you a bit of room to breathe but not for long. It’s the calm before the storm and by this point there’s nothing stopping the final stage from reaching its climax. Nothing you say will stop him, and yet you still try.

“Okay.”

He blinks a few times. “That’s it?” his voice raises. “‘Okay’ is all you have to say? Looks like our little photographer's already done a number on your heart.” His teeth are bared and clenched in a terrifying smile, white as your knuckles have now become as you clutch the crinkling paper, puzzle forgotten.

Seokjin grabs his phone and throws it against the wall, hard enough for the cracking of the screen to ring through the air, louder than his cursing yell. The condition of the phone gets even worse when it hits the hardwood floor, shattering even more but that doesn’t seem to phase him.

In fact, his tense shoulders relax almost immediately; yours, on the other hand, are locked up--as is the rest of your body, and it’ll remain in this state until your deep in sleep. So deep, even your body isn’t aware of the man cradling you from behind.

Huffing, he sits down beside you. “You know what, I’ll just tell him. The disgusting thing about men is that they can’t take the hint when a girl doesn’t want them until someone else tell them.” The irony doesn’t slip past you, but you’re too busy focusing on extinguishing the flames of fear that burns your blood.

He pats his pants as if feeling for something. “Hey,” he says, his voice back to normal without any malice behind it. A switch flicked. “have you seen my ph--” His eyes scan the room, landing on the damaged item he was looking for.

“Oh god,” he muttered, retrieving it to assess his destruction. The screen lit up, showing cracks covering every inch. Barely even readable, the touchscreen no longer functioning. “How did you end up like this?” He looks at it once more before placing it on the table beside me. “Looks like I’ll have to get a new phone. Do you want another one? Yours is a bit old.”

“Whatever you think is best,” you utter, not meeting his gaze.

“New phone for both of us it is.” He presses a kiss to your cheek before bringing you into the nook between his arm and torso. “I was thinking we could get the ones I did the ad for...”

Seokjin continues on the conversation as if the last few minutes never happened, talking about exciting things that happened during that shoot, then the shoot he’s currently doing now.

Tears clog your eyes, unable to see much of your surroundings but you continue on the conversation. You’re in a position where he can’t see your face, but if he did, it’d be like all the other times.

Whispers in your ear of how he was just trying to save you from your mistakes, how you’ll always have him to fix you when you slip up. Always.

Years pass by, with very much the same song-and-dance, slowly driving you insane. That little spark of fear never really died away, but it also never grew more than that. Unable to predict his mood always had you on edge, and the whiplash you would get from his behaviour made you jumpy.

Weary of the next little thing that made him snap.

He ground into you that you needed him. That he’d always have you, no matter what you did. It was like a constant knocking on the door and when someone knocks on the door enough times, eventually you answer it.

With how Seokjin was, you became secluded, afraid of any sort of contact you having would trigger that switch.

By isolating you, by having such a hold on your actions and feelings, he erased your exit. Now, it felt almost impossible to leave.

Almost.

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