#mortality mention

[8-evil-annoying-catboys]

honestly? existing in a mortal and fragile body is kinda fucked up. i don’t like that

[handweavers]

~

i feel that this loss has brought me to understand things i thought i knew but in truth had only grasped the surface, in my mind, and not in my heart. every time i lose someone it feels like a veil has been lifted and i understand the world more acutely than before, and i'm always surprised to discover that what i thought was clarity was just another veil, and another veil beneath, and another. i thought i didn't have blind spots anymore when it came to these things but i did, and do, but the nature of blind spots is that you don't realise they're there. i get now what people mean when they say that the older they get the less they understand, but somehow find peace and relief in that. it's difficult to put into words but i feel more at peace with a lot of things that terrified me only two weeks ago, and i've developed a healthier relationship with death, my constant companion, that who has tucked me into bed every night since i was a child and whispered promises to me. death feels less threatening and menacing, less of an adversary, less of a thief i have to guard people from.

i've been reading a lot about the advaita vedanta school of thought and it connects so closely with the conclusions i've reached on my own over the years and elaborates on the beliefs i've developed regarding death and life and the universe in a way that makes a lot of sense to me, and reading advaitin philosophy has brought me a lot of peace these past few days. i'm still very sad and grieving but there is a sense of peace alongside it, and less anguish and fear, and i find i'm not as afraid of future losses as much as i was before.

[ryuu-from-the-grave]

Things you don’t want your doctor to tell you when you’re already decaying from the inside out: You’re getting worse/You’re already at the stage we’d expect of someone in their forties.

I’ve just turned twenty.

Before they thought I’d live to my early sixties. Now they have no idea.

I’m so tired.

[fini-mun]

I just finished ordering urns for the rats. I usually do that during Christmas or in January but... I wasn’t willing to then.

I mean I’m still not happy doing so now but. I prefer to have them ready for when the time comes.

Pricey though... but. It is what it is.

[starfireandtheoutlaws]

Starfire and the Outlaws: Issue #0

read here!

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Translations:

Worse. Than you understand.

 Black. Wide… terrible. Terrifying. Empty. Sleeping…. with no dreams. 

There, and…not there. No you. No anything.

Thanks to @yukoutena and @stephaniebrowm!

[starfireandtheoutlaws]

Starfire and the Outlaws: Issue #0

read here!

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#mortality mention #death mention

[poupon]

Neutral life

live however

die shrugging

[rarestereocats]

okay,  so just saw something on my fb newsfeed about a treatment for diabetes also being the true anti-aging drug.  apparently,  they think this pill could increase the human lifespan to 120 years and i’m sitting here internally screaming.  of course,  the comments are people being like “oh hehe,  i don’t wanna hog up so many years on this precious planet  :)”,  and it’s like...get the fuck out of here then.  i’d take those pills in a fucking heartbeat.

like with all the advancements in medicine and technology that have happened in my life so far,  i’m genuinely excited that we’ll have the key to immortality or near immortality by the end of my life.  put my fucking brain in a robot,  man,  i don’t fucking care.  i am so obsessed with the prospect of immortality that it’s sickening.