so i have such a collossal ick with shipping john with noel and i think its exaserbated by the fact that i feel like you can only take the concept seriously if you smooth the ever loving shit out of john to the point he might as well not be the same guy.
like i dont think that noel would be able to get past the murder of parker (which john did on purpose and remembers doing on purpose) much less emily (the child john murdered on purpose and remembers doing on purpose) or god forbid the bone cathedreal (the millions of arthurs he murdered on purpose and remembers doing on purpose) so in the fluffy shipping world youd just have to have him. never tell them. which john has done so well with in the past. it sorta just breaks apart for me.
like theres being a freak and then theres expecting a man with 10 years of trauma who believes his boyfriend is fundamentally different from his tormentor finding out that there isn't actually any substancial difference and he was doing shit just as bad (in fact, worse) barely a week before he met him
and this isnt even getting into my hatred of characters who have all their inconvenient flaws and insecurities willfully ignored so they can be the team's life coach.
