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08.24.2024 [😌]
Dear Manhattan,
I am floating above you and I can see all five years splayed out across the avenues, that Lily of the Valley body mist traipsing down Lexington, my first sober diner dinner just 20 blocks north, the anxiety of my Mother in the hospital just a bit further southeast. I can smell Morningside Park and I can see the tens of thousands of stairs down there, the buzzing of bees and men on bikes with “what’s your name? Where are you going?” I can feel their stare burning into the back of me as I pack up 492 Manhattan Avenue for the very last time, my gaze climbing the fire escape as Sean did that night we were locked out. West greeting us with his soft meows and his silvery velvet handshake. I can smell the smoke of those first few cigarettes and the entire first season of Sex and the City. A black off the shoulder onesie and a Carrie Bradshaw inspired tulle skirt celebrating alone in Chelsea, a cigar bar in the village with that Broadway EP. I’d never kissed a man twice my age, and I don’t think I will again. I smoked American Spirit yellows and it wouldn’t be long before 30 Vandam grabbed my hand and lead me into my favorite chapters. So much to know, so much to grow into, dreams of something more and being able to touch it, feel it in my fingertips for the first time. It’s real, this isn’t fools gold - I am finally rich in all the ways I never dreamed I could be. Imagine that, all those early mornings, that last drink with James at Meehans, all for this - it was worth it. Climbing out of hell was worth this view and the pleasure of a body aching finally at rest. There is so much left to see, the subway has carried me through my 20s and all I want is one more bodega coffee - almond milk and two sugars.
Hey!! I write a lot of short stories and I’m starting to post them on my blogger account. I’m currently in school studying screenwriting and it is my dream to be a writer so if you could check my writing out and/or share it I would really appreciate it! I’m really interested in sci fi and horror so most of my short stories have science fiction or thriller themes to them. I would never ask for help without also offering it. So if there is anything you want me to see/share please message it to me and I will 100% do it! Thank you so much to anyone who doesn’t scroll right past this because that means a lot!!!
Read the latest story I posted!
Why is J’na smiling? Maybe it has to do with how much traction her podcast #AndFriends is getting. Read about her here.
Shop the Looney Tunes crop top and the navy pleated shorts.
I am so blind I am so deluded I give myself blindly to this nightmare of desires and loves who only wants is to devour this soul that hides in words, But my soul wants to lighten with songs of little birds at dawn. Walks face down, reciting the goodbye to be remembered whistles of a nightingale resounds like a stream of wind. Empty words crying and chunks of desire. I leave in this desolated stop, the farewell that always follows me.
The Shadow Of My Soul (@flippermood)
I'm challenging myself to do one new thing every week in NYC. Follow along as I share what I did, how I liked it, and whether I'd do it again!
This week, I tried TWO new things! Going to my first Mets game and checking out a different bar for a NY Liberty watch party. Which would you try?
Baseball and basketball in one week. Who am I?
