Don't imagine Pete having to put on some repetitive sleep music airing nights when Toms at the hospital for treatment but he had to go home. The music is little soft beeps that Pete can sleep without, cause they remind him of Tom heart monitor......
Don't imagine Tom getting used to waking up with a hand encircling his wrist two fingers on his pulse point and a still-asleep Pete unconsciously taking his pulse to remind himself that Toms alive and okay and in their bed........
Don't imagine Pete and Tom not remembering how to sleep in the same bed together once Toms cleared for it after remission. And them dancing around it awkwardly cause Pete refuses to hurt Tom in any way and Tom doesn't know how to ask Pete to hold him and remind him he's still alive with Pete......
Don't imagine Tom getting excited or annoyed at Mav after chemo and raising his voice, only to erupt in a harsh coughing fit, Mav clinging to his side and calming him down. Then in the after, even worse, Mav agreeing with whatever Ice says or wants because he doesn't want to aggravate Ice and make him raise his voice, so he just dociley agrees with anything Ice wants. While Ice despairs at Mav losing his fire and what makes Mav Mav and hating himself and the cancer even more for taking one more thing away from them..........
Don't imagine Tom, finally able to wake up by himself and get ready and eat breakfast himself. And then go back to their bedroom only to find Pete sobbing desperately into their bedsheets in anguish cause he thought it was all a dream and Tom was gone when he woke up alone, no steady beating under his ears, no weight or warmth in the bed beside him and no pulse under his fingertips...........
