May 12
okay I have to admit that I lowkey ate with my sensory details in chapter four, I’m proud of it.
seen from United Kingdom
seen from United States
seen from China
seen from Germany
seen from Germany
seen from Germany
seen from Japan
seen from United Kingdom
seen from Russia
seen from Spain
seen from France
seen from United Kingdom
seen from Australia
seen from Ukraine
seen from Australia
seen from China
seen from Brazil
seen from Japan
seen from Sweden
seen from China
okay I have to admit that I lowkey ate with my sensory details in chapter four, I’m proud of it.
10:43pm Thoughts
I stopped reading my unsent notes for you, it’s not that I don’t think of you anymore or I don’t love you like I used to. Its just that my frequent visits in the past is like removing the scabs of a healing wound. It feels so good but once it’s open the sting hurts like crap. Its like the flesh are rotten to its core and opening it would mean going through hell once more. Yes I do think of you every once in a while. When I hear our music play, or when the rain pours and the thunder rolls, or when I see young lovers get so clingy, or just in an ordinary day when all I want to do is laze around hoping your there with me too. I admit I still love you, it didn’t change. I don't think it will change, You're still special but I get so used to the pain that loving you doesn’t mean wanting you back.
-K
Life after loss.
Let my heart speak out today for being deaf for a month that sometimes I forget that I am suffering. I was quiet but I was not blind. I still have sense of feeling and touch, that I’m still a broken girl and left alone, there’s still scars and have my wounded heart. These days, I’m at my emptiest. But I’m still striving and barely breathing though it’s aching. I can see clearly good things in life continue showering me, makes me realize that there’s so much better things beyond the pain. Pain is not really a pain—something good I’d feel about it. With all the strength I had, I kept everything inside. But the truth is.. my love for you is still here, slowly beating and how I wish I could stop it from jumping because it's really killing me. That is a way it is with a wound, the wound begins to protect what is hurting so much. And once it is closed, you can't ever get me back. And I'm okay with that.😊
Laugh
Perhaps, the best way to know if you had moved on is when you just laugh it off whenever you hear that person's name. Congratulations! You level up!
currently painting........