PAIRING: george o'malley x fem!reader
WARNINGS: mentions of death, no use of y/n
GENRE: fluff
SONG INSPIRATION: lose myself by k?d, phil good
WORD COUNT: 666
NOTE: he deserves so much more love
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the locker room was nearly silent, except for the hum of the overhead lights and the distant sound of monitors beeping down the hall. you sat slumped on the bench, still in your scrubs, your hands clasped loosely in your lap, staring at the scuffed tile floor.
the weight of the day pressed down on you. another loss. and another. and another. none of them your fault, none of them preventable, but that didn’t make it any easier.
you had done everything you could, and it still hadn’t been enough.
the door creaked open, the sound pulling you from your daze. you didn’t have to look up to know who it was. everyone else had already gone home, leaving the halls empty and the air thick with exhaustion.
george stepped inside, shutting the door behind him with a quiet click. his scrub cap was gone, his curls slightly disheveled, a few stubborn strands falling onto his forehead.
he looked just as drained as you felt, his usually bright eyes dulled by fatigue.
still, when your eyes met, you gave him a tired but genuine smile.
“hey,” you murmured.
he let out a long breath, a deep, heavy sigh as he crossed the room and sank down beside you. his knee bumped against yours, his whole body slumping forward like all the energy had finally drained from him the moment he sat down.
“hey,” he echoed, running a hand down his face. “god, what a day.”
you hummed in agreement, tilting your head back against the lockers.
“rough one?” he asked, already knowing the answer.
you let out a dry, humorless chuckle. “brutal.”
there was a beat of silence before you leaned into him, your shoulder pressing against his. he didn’t move away, didn’t even seem surprised. just let you settle against him, the scent of antiseptic and faint cologne lingering on his skin.
it was stupid, but you thought he looked his best like this. not after a full night’s sleep, not when he was clean shaven and perfectly put together, but like this. raw, exhausted, the day still clinging to him. so him.
for a while, neither of you spoke. just sat there, breathing, existing.
“i lost three patients today,” you finally said, your voice quieter than before.
george exhaled slowly. “yeah,” he said. “me too.”
the weight of it settled between you. you knew the words he wasn’t saying, the things he was feeling, because you felt them too.
“it’s not supposed to feel this normal,” you admitted. “like, i know we’re supposed to get used to it, but… i don’t want to.”
“you won’t,” he said, shaking his head slightly. “you won’t get used to it. we’ll just learn how to live with it.”
you closed your eyes for a moment, letting his words settle over you. they didn’t make it easier, didn’t erase the ache in your chest, but they helped. maybe that was enough for now.
george shifted beside you, turning his head slightly to look at you. “you wanna grab a bite before heading home?”
you cracked an eye open, smirking faintly. “you asking me on a date, o’malley?”
he huffed a tired laugh, rubbing the back of his neck. “i mean… if i was, would you say yes?”
you tilted your head, pretending to think about it. “depends. where are you taking me?”
he sat up straighter, suddenly looking very serious. “joe’s.”
you raised an eyebrow. “joe’s?”
“yeah,” he said, nodding firmly. “a greasy burger, maybe some fries, a drink if we need it. something to make today suck a little less.”
you tried to fight the smile tugging at your lips. “so now you’re really trying to impress me.”
“is it working?”
you pushed yourself up from the bench, stretching slightly. “come on, lover boy. let’s go.”
george rolled his eyes, but he still stood up beside you, and as you walked out together, his hand brushed yours, just for a second.
i feel so goddamn guilty recently for having people who care about me. im so fucked in the head that all i can do is be resentful and hurt over not having one specific kind of relationship. all i can do is look at the people who do and ache and be jealous and want to close the door to my room and never interact with anyone or anything. meanwhile people care about me. and i cant just shut up and be grateful. all i can do is hurt.
