Whether it’s about your job or your classes, your relationships or your goals, your greatest hope or your deepest heartache. When it comes to anything we really want, anything we really care about, anything that really hits home, it’s easy to be worried.
It’s easy to be worried about whether it’s ever going to happen. About how it’s going to happen. How it might never happen. How we’re going to make sure it happens. How to keep it from happening.
So we try to deal with that uncertainty by over-planning.
By dwelling on all the “what-ifs.” By playing out all of the possible outcomes. By trying to prevent problems that may never happen. By worrying about things that literally can’t happen.
We let our worries run away with us. So we over-plan. So much so that we can get lost in our plans. Losing sight of why we were even planning, until the plans become an end to themselves.
And our stress, our anxiety just keeps ratcheting up. Higher and higher.
Or we can follow the Gospel model.
Let go of the “what-ifs.” Trust God’s plan. Receive the peace that comes with that trust.
Know that God has nothing but the best in mind for us. That God’s best is everything we need. And better than we could ever imagine.
Everything you need? God has already provided for it.
Everything you’re worried about? God has already taken care of it.
The question is whose plan will you follow to handle all of that?
The answer comes down to who you trust.
Not who we say we trust. But who we really trust – as revealed by what we actually do.
Are we going to ignore all of the times we’ve come up short, all of the times that our plans have failed, and trust ourselves? Or are we going to trust the One who never fails?
Whether it’s about your job or your classes, your relationships or your goals, your greatest hope or your deepest heartache. When it comes to anything we really want, anything we really care about, anything that really hits home, it’s easy to be worried.
It’s easy to be worried about whether it’s ever going to happen. About how it’s going to happen. How it might never happen. How we’re going to make sure it happens. How to keep it from happening.
So we try to deal with that uncertainty by over-planning.
By dwelling on all the “what-ifs.” By playing out all of the possible outcomes. By trying to prevent problems that may never happen. By worrying about things that literally can’t happen.
We let our worries run away with us. So we over-plan. So much so that we can get lost in our plans. Losing sight of why we were even planning, until the plans become an end to themselves.
And our stress, our anxiety just keeps ratcheting up. Higher and higher.
Or we can follow the Gospel model.
Let go of the “what-ifs.” Trust God’s plan. Receive the peace that comes with that trust.
Know that God has nothing but the best in mind for us. That God’s best is everything we need. And better than we could ever imagine.
Everything you’re worried about? God has already taken care of it.
Everything you need? God has already provided for it.
The question is whose plan will you follow to handle all of that?
The answer comes down to who you trust.
Not who we say we trust. But who we really trust – as revealed by what we actually do.
Are we going to ignore all of the times we’ve come up short, all of the times that our plans have failed, and trust ourselves? Or are we going to trust the One who never fails?
As a writer, I’ve struggled with my personal process for quite some time now. Those who know me well enough to be privy to my process can attest to the fact that I have plagued by perfectionism and over-planning for my entire writing career up to this point.
So, since I’ve been working on streamlining and minimizing in my home life, I decided to go for it in my writing life, too! It’s…
I come from a generation of people who have this intense pressure to succeed on our shoulders. As part of a group of kids who grew up in a really difficult place in history, the odds have been kind of stacked against us. After all, higher education is extremely expensive, the economy is still in a major gray area, and unemployment rates are not exactly encouraging. Because we have every reason to not reach our goals, we strive even harder for them. It’s awesome to have dreams for yourself and to do whatever it takes to get to them, but sometimes you lose out on your own spirit in the process.
Just about two and a half years ago, I had completely lost my spirit without realizing it. I went to college to major in something that was more "sensible" than what I honestly wanted to do. I was in a relationship that was stifling. I was being forced to act a certain way, dress a certain way, and be a person who I wasn’t. I lost the connection I had with some of my closest friends and focused my attention on someone who had absolutely no direction in life, a complete "I’ll figure it out later" attitude, but managed to have a concrete plan for me. I was completely blind to all of this and okay with handing my future over to this person, who saw me being a really great housewife one day, who could work from home if I found working to be absolutely necessary. This was a person who would get angry at me for using big words, who thought I wasted too much time reading and coming up with “unrealistic” ideas. I had friends there, of course, but they told me I was doing the right thing also. They reminded me that he was a good guy; he’d give me the future I always wanted, and I’d be stupid to mess it all up. I was coasting through life day by day, going through the motions just to hit the markers on the path laid out for me at 18 years old.
I thought this was all good. Life had thrown too many curveballs at me in other areas, and I thought having a plan would keep me on the straight and narrow. It wasn’t until I was out of that toxic relationship, away from some of those warped friendships to realize that I wasn’t living. I hadn’t found the thrill in anything, hadn’t felt alive in so long that I couldn’t remember the last thing I got excited about. I realized the first step in figuring things out was learning to focus on myself again. Once I did, I realized my biggest problem: I was depending too much on all the plans that had been made for me, the plans I’d accepted for myself. The only way I was going to get me back was by letting go of all these stupid ideas and actually living my life. It was hard, but I did it. It turned out that this would be the best thing I ever did for myself.
Because hindsight is 20/20, I realize now that it was ridiculous to have let things get that far in the first place. If I stayed with the plans I had, I wouldn't have the education that has enriched my life so much, the job that I love, the experiences with the friends who know and love the real me. I would have never spent nights at a bar laughing with my friends, never would have screamed at the top of my lungs in the middle of a concert. I would have been gearing up to graduate college with a degree that didn't matter because I’d be planning a wedding and settling into the fact that I’d cook and clean and take care of kids for the rest of my life. That might very well be the life that someone out there wants to live, but that most definitely is not the life for me.
Whether you like it or not, sometimes you have to say “screw you” to all the outside influences and do what makes you happy in life. It’s scary to accept the fact that life is going to throw things at you unexpectedly, but sometimes those are the greatest things that can happen. You can't let your future take over your present. Sure, there are things I know I’d like to do before my time on Earth is up. I still want to become a published author, get married, have kids, and see the world. Maybe those things will happen for me and maybe they won’t. Either way, I’ve realized that you can’t get so hung up on the destination that you rush through the journey. If you find yourself in a rut and faking smiles instead of really laughing, stop right there, because it’s one thing to fake a smile but it’s a completely different thing to fake a life.
