#pathological anxiety

[iosonounapersonamiao]

Yesterday, when we were in 4 at school because the other classmates were in Venice, a substitute teacher asked me why I wasn’t at the school trip with them.

I replied it was because I am disabled, because I didn't want to specify it was because of anxiety, undiagnosed autism, IBS, and other mental and physical issues I have, be them diagnosed or not.

Well, of course (/sarc), she was like "Oh, no, don't say that, you are not like the disabled!" despite, you know, having just met me for the first time in her life.

So I told her about my anxiety, and she said–

She said–

She bloody said–

To try yoga.

[iosonounapersonamiao]

Anxiety: Bye bye!

Me: Oh thank the Norns

Splitting: Hey hey!

[iosonounapersonamiao]

Far from home

I want to study abroad.

The problem is... I have difficulties with falling asleep, especially when I am not with my parents, and sometimes I need to sleep in their same bed. And I also have IBS and pathological anxiety, and going on a plane is very difficult for me, especially without psychological support my mother usually gives.

So living far from home seems quite impossible.

But I would really like to study abroad for a semester. I don’t even have to worry about language, nor about my final exams in Italy (because, if I am going, I am going during my last school year; wise choice, I know, lol). Only about these personal issues that I am also quite ashamed about.

Are there other people who have the same problems as me? I know there are people with pathological anxiety and IBS, but are there ones who need to be with their parents this much? My therapist never told me anything about it, so I feel like I am the only one, and don't know what to do to become better at sleeping alone...

Just yesterday I had to fall asleep with my mother.

Does this thing have a name? How is it caused? How can I overcome it?

I just feel so ughhh.

[ohsresearchlibrary]