Find A Song
about someone who winds up in the hospital after a particularly self-destructive emotional breakdown
Patternist - I Don't Feel Real
Fronted by musician Gabe Mouer, Patternist is a blend of rhythmic synths, heart-thumping percussion, lush arrangements coupled with Gabe's wistful lyrics.
The band's debut album "I Don't Know What I'm Doing Here" hits stores on September 6, 2019 via InVogue Records.
Gabe Mouer/Patternist on the new single: "I Donāt Feel Real was the first step towards me taking more of a narrative approach to songwriting. Just after the release of Give It Up [EP], I had this debilitating crisis of identity as a songwriter that spiraled into feeling like I sort of didnāt have anything to offer anybody, and really like I had no real prospect for the future. You know, stuck in this very myopic view of my life I just walked around feeling entirely empty, which is where the phrase āI Donāt Feel Real,ā came from. But I knew when I sat down to write that I didnāt want to be like, āIām sad,ā for 3 minutes, it just wasnāt interesting to me and I didnāt think it would be interesting to anyone listening to it. So I wrote this story about someone who winds up in the hospital after a particularly self-destructive emotional breakdown, whoās forced to acknowledge what a burden that can be to the people around them. Strangely enough, it felt more personal to mix the fictitious with real-life experiences. "
On the video for "I Don't Feel Real": "The shoot for this track was simultaneously the most fun yet terrifying experience Iāve had working on a video by far. When we decided we wanted to do a video for I Donāt Feel Real, I immediately knew I didnāt want the concept to be either too literal or too serious, but even after I got the initial pitch from Aaron and Anneliese I had no idea what I was getting myself into and how outrageous it was going to get. I wouldnāt consider myself the most extroverted person, and, although it might sound counterintuitive as a musician, drawing attention to myself makes me incredibly anxious. But during this shoot I ended up dancing, air drumming, and fist pumping like a complete nerd in all of these public spaces alongside the most horrifying sex doll, the concept was just too funny not to go all in." (press release)