#petty squabbles

[zestymeow]

my cats fighting over a box: a saga

sake bomb is the first to stake a claim

marg takes notice and tries to bully him out

she eventually succeeds until sake bomb decides that He Has Had Enough Of Her Shit

and now? the box is empty, for it has already lost its luster in the eyes of my dumb ass cats

[archived-darksideoftheshadows]

@asktheriddler

He really should let sleeping dogs lie. But he wasn’t the kind to just turn his back on an opportunity either, so when he had gotten news that the Riddler was currently robbing a bank in Gotham, he took his opportunity by the throat. 

The only reason anyone would rob a bank was for money, unless they were him and did it for fun. 

So, with a whisk of shadows he took all the money in the bank, leaving but a dollar in the shadow of the wall. 

[somethingusefulfromflorida]

My boss and I got into a bit of an argument, and I need someone to weigh in and tell me I'm right.

Putting something "on top" of a bookshelf is not the same as putting it "on the top shelf." That's like putting something on top of a filing cabinet and saying it's in the top drawer; the top, the roof, the lid, whatever you call it, that doesn't count as part of the storage unit. When she asks me to look on the top shelf for something, and I don't see it, she acts like I'm an idiot for not standing on a stool to look ABOVE the top shelf.

What does "the top shelf" mean to you?

[kellancallic]

King Trader

“Allow me to introduce myself,” I said. “My name is Lord Kellan Macharius Callic, As head of my House, I thought it was best to meet with you personally, apparently you’ve been disrupting several of my trade routes and lay claim to one of the worlds in my sphere of influence, would you like to explain yourself?”

“Lord Callic, you have it all wrong. You are the one laying claim to my world and my trade routes. I’m afraid that I gave your people a better deal. Well, they’re really my people now, aren’t they?”

I closed my eyes for a brief moment, deliberating. I’m not exactly looking to start another war, not the least another of the Emperor’s servants. Still, sometimes one has to establish dominance and remind the younger Houses why you’re still in business.

“Then allow me to make an offer of my own. I will not bring your House to the brink of ruin as long as you keep away from my territory.”

“Ah, but I can’t. It’s my land now. Even so, you have a very old House, my Lord. Perhaps you need to make way for the younger generation?”

I stood up. This is all the incentive I need.

“Very well then. I’m sorry it came to this. Still, if it’s a war you want, it’s a war you’ll get. Make no mistake, I am going to bring your House to its knees, I am will fight you in the markets, I will fight you in the streets, whether with thrones or with lasguns, I will see you subjugated. Good day, my Lady.”

And with that, I take my leave of the poor woman. I’ll have to say prayer to the Emperor, to have mercy on her and have mercy on I. She knows not what she is doing.

My name is Kellan Macharius Callic, and I am King.

[thoroughly-magnificent-millie]

Petty Squabbles // Coup de Main // Millie & Hestia

Date: January 12, 1979 Location: Ministry of Magic, Department of Mysteries

Millicent didn't want to be here, but she wasn't going to let the Order infiltrate the Ministry without her presence. She was Head of the fucking entire department, for Merlin's sake. She knew everything that went on in DMAC and half of what went on in every other department because she was observant and ambitious, and if she were going to become Minister in a few years, she needed to know everything.

She'd been one of the ones pushing for action, though, but she hadn't imagined this. Her frustrations at her work--so much bureaucratic bullshit and red tape stopping her from getting anything actually done--was spilling over into the Order, where she felt like the same issues shouldn't be happening.

The last thing Millicent was allowing was this club of trigger-happy children get into the Department of Mysteries without her being in on it. She knew more about the ways of the Ministry than perhaps anyone except Moody did, so she was invaluable. Someone had procured her a Polyjuice, some backup in a flash in her robes, and she was disguised as some mousy Ministry grunt barely out of Hogwarts. The younger, smaller body was taking some getting used to, but she had little patience to deal with it, considering her partner.

Millie didn't dislike Hestia Jones any more than she disliked any other woman in the Ministry. She'd never really dealt with the woman, but Hestia had always struck her as too tentative, smart but not capable of getting anything done herself without being told first. And lately, Millie had been picking up on hints that Hestia had some objection to her. She assumed the other woman had simply been reading the papers; perhaps she was religious, or simply prudish. It didn't bother Millie that one of her coworkers disliked her, but she had somehow gotten stuck with Hestia at the Ministry, and Hestia's perceived dislike of her was getting on her nerves.

They'd gained entrance already and were taking a back corridor to get to the Department of Mysteries, eyes peeled for intruders or Death Eaters. "Any idea what we're looking for?" Millie asked Hestia, more to check that her companion was still there (it was dark in the corridor, and they weren't about to light their wands to bring attention to themselves) than out of actual desire to hold a conversation.