The gay community has internalized the larger culture’s homophobia and transphobia, which has made us ashamed of our visible queerness, especially any signs of genderqueerness. We have internalized the larger culture’s ableism, which has made us ashamed of our disabilities and illnesses. This shame has marginalized many trans and genderqueer folks and many people with disabilities, casting them out of the mainstream gay community. Internalized self-hatred, a distancing from the bodies of those who do not fit the idealized norms, an insistence on assimilation: all of these lead to and result from a sense of shame in our bodies—a shame that pervades our conversations, our relationships, and our politics. This tendency to move away from the body, to drop the experiences of bodies out of conversations and politics, is evident in many queer organizations. We lack the language to say what needs to be said; we don’t have the tools to carry on this level of conversation.
Because we lack this language, because of our internalized self-hatred and shame in our bodies, the politics of the bathroom—a potentially transgressive and liminal site—have not been given priority within the mainstream gay rights movement. This inattention has particularly strong real-life effects on disabled and genderqueer folks. The need for a safe, dignified, usable place to pee is a vital, but too seldom addressed, issue.
Simone Chess, Alison Kafer, Jessi Quizar, and Mattie Udora Richardson, "Calling All Restroom Revolutionaries!", published in That's Revolting: Queer Strategies For Resisting Assimilation
