#possibly disordered

[creatively-idiot]

This is the thing that might be a delusion

I’m not ok, but you already knew that

(Contends might be triggering)

[lambray-idiot]

When I look in the mirror I know it’s me, when I see my body I know it’s there, it’s me. When I smile in the mirror a little voice says “yes, that’s you, little creature/pos” as some of my teeth are oddly sharp. But my eyes are the problem

They are there, in my head, but that’s all they are, they’re not my eyes, MY eyes are colorful, not this brown mess, MY eyes are yellow with small orange and red specks

I don’t know how long it’s been like this because I don’t really notice my “eyes” in my reflection but, I feel like I’ve always been like “that’s not quite right” with my eyes, but maybe back then it was because they appeared to become darker with time, my pupil slowly blending into the my iris, but now

My eyes, aren’t, MY EYES

[lambray-idiot]

I feel like my eyes are just balls of bright colors, I don’t expect to see a reflection when I walk past a mirror or reflective surface, reality and daydreams are melding into one existence, my skin is peeling off my bones, I want to live in my head but at the same time it’s the least safe place I know.

I’m not ok

But I don’t know how to ask for help