#postmormonism

[theotherjudas]

“When did you become an atheist?” 

Me: “I was born an atheist. Mormonism was just a phase.” 

[theotherjudas]

GETTING OVER MORMONISM

Start reading media coverage of the church and its leaders and policies.

And I don’t mean that pandering shitrag we all know as The Deseret News. Or the LDS church’s official news briefs or press conferences. I’m talking legit, honest-to-baby jesus journalism. 

With the recent death of Thomas S. Monson, the erstwhile mormon prophet, I noticed an interesting phenomenon. On the one hand, I read his obituary in the New York Times, that national bastion of hard-hitting and ethically responsible journalism. Regardless of your stance on this paper, it has been and remains, in most regards, the “paper of record” for the United States. Their take on the dead prophet was objective and, to my ears, balanced. It spoke of Monson’s public life of service and openness to new academic probes into church history. It also touched on some of the controversies (to put it lightly) that had sullied his career as the top man, namely the church’s hard-right anti-LGBTAQ+ stances and flat-out refusal to ordain women to the priesthood. On the other hand, TBM people were in a tizzy because their beloved Monson wasn’t been “treated with the respect due a prophet of god” in the media. The truth is, they wanted their biases confirmed, and lacking that, got bothered that anyone could see things differently. 

First, on the value of reading journalism in general: I am a huge proponent of reading and watching good journalism. Does it take time? Sure. Is it depressing? Yeah, pretty much always. Isn’t it confusing with so many voices out there? Yes, but you can figure it out. 

You don’t need to take journalism classes in school to appreciate good reportage. I sure didn’t. But as I got older and saw the world going insane around me, I realized it was time to get onboard. And you should too. Here’s what I did: I went to websites for news sources with good reputations (NY Times, the Washington Post, and many others) and just read. I didn’t understand much at first, but after a few months I began to make connections between issues, I got to know the movers and shakers on the national stage making the decisions, and I began to understand why it all mattered. Yes, there are news sources who are intentionally bent to pander to the political far right. You’ve probably heard this said of Fox news. But its also true of most local news. And a hell of a lot of AM talk radio (my grandpa eats that shit up). There are news and politics podcasts out there, for those on the go, and funny shows like Last Week Tonight and the Daily Show (there’s nothing wrong with some fun while you’re learning about real shit going on in the world). Long story short, consuming good media will help you find your way through the world. Engage. You owe it to yourself. 

Secondly, on the value of reading about mormonism in the public media: the LDS church is a PR machine. They’re all about getting good press. It’s no accident that they bend to political pressure all the time. Used to be black men couldn’t get the priesthood. Now they can. Used to be gay people were an abomination. Now, they’re cool as long as they keep their dicks out of each other’s mouths and live as unhappy straight people. This is a smokescreen. The church is desperate to hide their unsavory (at best, illegal and traitorous/ felonious at worst) past. They want to look like an institution of love and acceptance when the reality couldn’t be further from the truth. It’s all about spin. A happy face to the world is a good business tactic - they can sell family values and their plan of happiness. They can’t sell suicidal kids or pill addictions or rampant hypocrisy about porn. The Deseret News was a fixture in every mormon home I visited as a kid because is the church’s main channel for indoctrinating their masses. If you’re an exmo like me, a lot of the ideas you’ve been indoctrinated with were proliferated through DI (that’s Deseret Industries) publications. 

So, to sum up:

1) Reading good journalism will make you a more rounded, active, aware, and interesting human adult citizen and person. 

2) Reading journalism about the church and its leaders will help you break out of thinking of these men as too holy to touch or criticize. You’ll learn that they are just men, fallible, old out-of-touch white fuckers who are probably losing their minds (I’m not a journalist, I can say what I want about them). 

3) You will see other perspectives on the ideas and policies the church upholds. You will start to see through the smokescreen (lucky you, if you’re reading this, chances are you already can!). You will develop an ear for LDS spin to call it out. 

To borrow a phrase, the truth is out there. It may be complicated and hard to find, but once you know how to look, you can avoid spin and falsehood. Stop letting the church’s smokescreen work on you. 

[theotherjudas]

Torn

Over the last few weeks, I’ve been feeling somewhat torn regarding this whole blog thing. 

I initially set out with two objectives: 1) to give myself a personal outlet regarding religion and mormonism, and 2) to, hopefully, provide an outlet for others. I felt that by giving voice to my own thoughts and feelings and inner conflicts, I could unburden myself a little and maybe help another person feel heard or understood in the process. 

Recently, I’ve found it harder and harder to get myself to write. It isn’t lack of ideas or topics to discuss. On the contrary, the obstacle in my way is the absolute glut of things wrong with the world, the total insanity of the LDS church that marches ever onward seemingly unchecked, the total anti-logic of the current political scene. There’s just too much. And I feel overwhelmed. 

What can I do? I’m just one person. My voice is so small. I wonder if I’m having any effect at all. And so I’m torn. Do I go on?

I truly feel that one voice can have an effect. To that end, even though sometimes I feel like I’m shouting into the void, I will continue to write. I will continue to rail against corruption. 

I want to thank those who follow me and take the time to read my humble thoughts. I want to thank all those who have shared my posts because I stand behind my words 100% and believe they, when added to the experiences and affirmations of hundreds of others, can make a difference. I want to thank everyone who read this indulgent dreck in it’s entirety. 

I want to offer encouragement to those dealing with getting out or getting over mormonism, or any religion for that matter. I am here to tell you: things will get better. Those of us who have gone before are here, we’ll embrace you. We will not leave you or let you down. 

I believe together we can make a difference. And to that end I want to re-up my commitment to this endeavor. I will write when I can. I will speak out. I hope you will join me. 

[theotherjudas]

I completely forgot that it was Conference this weekend

Ah. That would explain the conspicuous increase in guilt texts from the parents. 

For anyone who is being forced or pressured to sit through that shit: hang in there. I know it sucks. Hard. But it’ll be over soon. 

Here’s a game you can play, one that I got very god at playing in my youth. If you can stomach it, listen to the talks and evaluate a few of the statements made by the general authorities (or, better yet, the “prophet” himself) - you know, the beliefs they try to pass off as facts, and see if you can spot the lies. Spot the inaccuracies. Spot the intentional omissions. Spot the equivocations. Spot the whitewashing of church history. Spot the guilt, the manipulation, the pride. Spot the deceit in action. Hone those critical thinking skills. Make yourself stronger while those sitting in the pews around you make themselves weaker. You’ll be better for it. 

Or, you know, just tune the while thing out. That’s cool too. 

Because: fuck Conference. 

[theotherjudas]

How do you identify?

I’ve recently been involved in some discussions about how I and others of my religious/ cultural ilk identify ourselves. Here’s what I say:

I am an ex-mormon.

I am “mormon” by birth (by “covenant”...  though no one asked my permission) and by culture. I think of myself, even today, as “culturally mormon,” in much the same way some Jewish people refer to themselves as culturally Jewish despite not practicing any of the religious aspects of that culture. 

I am “ex-” by choice. For me, that’s what the prefix represents. I didn’t choose to be mormon, but I did choose to leave. I chose to claim my own identity. And part of that identity, to me, is recognizing that while cultural mormonism is encoded in me - it’s an inescapable fact of my life -  it does not determine where I go from here. 

I also consider the term “apostate” an appropriate moniker. Mostly because it sounds bass-ass and scares the shit out of True Believing Mormons (TBMs). But to me, “apostate” means one who has rejected the gospel and thereby chosen “outer darkness.” I embrace what mormons fear: I am an adversary. 

I am “anti-mormon,” in the sense that I openly oppose the church, it’s leadership, and their teachings. In my view, this is an aspect of being “anti-religion” in general. In the same way, I am an “atheist” because I not only believe that god does not exist objectively, but because I fight against the human manifestations of “god:” religion, churches, faith-based brainwashing, etc.  

I like “heathen” too. Means I get to have fun. 

So, I’m sincerely asking anyone and everyone: how do you think of yourself in the context of mormonism?