La hundo, kiu amis Keats (’The dog who loved Keats’, translated from the Esperanto)
Our chat group pitching a movie to Wes Anderson:
Max Argent-Marteau (played by @mishacollins) is a man working at a successful law firm. He's an attorney who failed the bar seven times and is reluctantly hired by his father’s (played Bill Murray) firm. Relegated to the most boring, tedious cases, he spends his days obsessing over the object of his desire. He's in love with the Hungarian cleaning lady (played by Tilda Swinton) who empties his waste basket every afternoon. She's a one-eyed beauty and a chain smoker.
In his obsession to learn everything about her he discovers that she's on the run from an ex-husband, a Russian mobster (Adrien Brody) with a speech impediment and a proclivity toward using ninja stars to dispatch his enemies.
Max is best friends with a surfer (Owen Wilson) who only speaks Esperanto. He reads Shakespeare to his dog. His dog prefers Keats. Under his friends counsel, Max and the cleaning lady (whose name we never learn) run off together to Venthaven, chased by the Russian mobster. They document their journey on Instagram which of course, helps the mobster track them, because. DUH.
Max: How does he keep finding us??
Surfer: (in Esperanto) because you are fucking tagging pictures, Dumbass.
Max and his lover become an international sensation. The mobster has one of those tiny purse dogs. It's his baby. Max posts an image of the purse dog, insulting it’s virility. The mobster vows to put a painful and horrendous end to Max.
Meanwhile, Max and the one-eyed Hungarian cleaning lady plight their troth with a blood bond, and exchange candy bracelets while squatting in a derelict YMCA. That's where the mobster finds them, but suddenly an army of drones come to their rescue, piloted by a band of drone enthusiasts (headed by Edward Norton) they met on their trip.
In the ensuing melee, the mobster’s ninja star ricochets off of a drone. Having mortally wounding himself, he falls into the Y’s empty swimming pool.
I’m tagging all my wifey’s. Even if they didn’t contribute to the madness directly, the stink of their sense of humor is all over this one.
@powerfulweak, @supernaturallynoble, @trekchik, @winjennster