#pre wls

[jennybbad-blog]

[jennybbad-blog]

Synthesized WLS Post-Op Instructions My WLS center gives a ton on instructions, but no checklists. Being a visual person, I had to take my prior Post-It instructions made for caregivers into the kind of notes I teach my students to take. Now I can better see how proactive I'm going to need to be in order to reach needed hydration and the protein intake my provider wants.

[jennybbad-blog]

I have experienced a number of traumas in my life and as a result I've developed a some maladaptive behaviors (including emotional eating). I've done years of talk therapy - while it was good to analyze past events, it did little to change my current life. An eating disorder specialist referred me to a counselor that uses EMDR methods to identify anxiety provoking situations, key memories at the source, and then work to defuse the memories. Now that I'm approaching WLS, I'm finding it very helpful in purging anxiety and fear. I've now deeply installed the belief that I am totally capable of making lasting change in my life!

[jennybbad-blog]

In preparation for weight loss surgery, I needed to totally reevaluate my psych meds. I was very fortunate to find a psychiatrist who believed that #1 I’ve been over medicated for years, and #2 that this could be changed and I could be stable with just one medication. To date, I have titrated off of four mood stabilizing medications and began just one to take it’s place. The only downside has been with the last SSRI - now I find myself in the fourth week of withdrawal :( With surgery just a week away, it’s helpful to know that as unpleasant as this is, it’s transitory - I will be free of it eventually.

[jennybbad-blog]

7 days to sleeve surgery - just purged my pantry to donate to a food bank, now have two shelves of post surgery prep (so far).

[jennybbad-blog]

Someday I Will ...

I'm one week out until gastric sleeve surgery! I came to this decision YEARS after being told that my degenerative knees needed full replacement, but that (in order to have a lasting outcome), I had to first loose 90 pounds. I tried my best, truly I did, but progress seemed glacial. Now that I've committed to this choice, I'm imagining all the things accessible without the shroud of all this excess weight. Someday I will ... - travel without fear of being fat shamed - fitting into an economy seat allowing for my travel - develop stamina and greater health all around - being able to fit into a wet suit and learning how to scuba - hike in my beautiful Pacific Northwest - bike far and wide (without being wide on the seat) - (post knee replacement) possibly run?? - (post body shaping procedure) go sleeveless - be able to wear sexy shoes - be able to go in ANY store / buy whatever appeals to me without restriction to the small plus size section - stand out proud in pictures (instead of hiding in the background) - be loud and proud at karaoke - forgive myself for not taking this hard path before I'm 50! - reconcile my mind to the more authentic me (let go of the me I've always been)

[jennybbad-blog]

The Journey Begins - Resources that are Helping Me :)

First Steps

Having made the decision to get weight loss surgery, it was time to jump the hoops. 

First step ... went to informational seminar at Swedish Hospital in Issaquah WA. Found out about the variety of different options. As my insurance doesn’t cover any form of weight loss surgery, I didn’t need a referral and skipped right to intake evaluation by the Swedish Weight Loss Center . 

The following month, I met with a surgeon, a therapist, and a nutritionist - determined that the gastric sleeve was the best option for me considering my physical health (weight of 330 - I was pre diabetic years ago but got off meds through diet and exercise). RNY not suggested as it is more evasive / greater nutrition reabsorption issues. There was a bit of concern re: acid reflux - one of my psych meds has a sleep side affect AND gave me the major munchies. As a result, I would sometimes get acid reflux when I would eat right before bed. Acid reflux is apparently worse with the sleeve than RNY so I’m a bit concerned, not because of the late night eating as I was going to investigate getting my meds changed, but I have a narrow throat (as in, getting a breathing tube down my throat in challenging in surgeries) and when I eat without drinking (the rules with any WLS procedure), I can get reflux. 

I left with a long task list - texts to research, strategies to start incorporating into my daily routine, products to try etc. 

I began with simple goals - to increasing my water intake, to sample various protein powders and start incorporating them into my diet, continue abstaining from overt sugars - unfortunately, I couldn’t incorporate exercise as requested as it was near impossible as my knee was totally jacked up.  

WLS Support Resources

So I did what I could and started my research. I began with  The Emotional First Aid Kit: A Guide to Life After Bariatric Surgery - great starter resource. My next suggested reading choice - A Course in Weight Loss: 21 Spiritual Lessons for Surrendering Your Weight Forever by Marianne Williamson.  Being that my experience with Overeaters Anonymous has helped me to realize that their is a spiritual solution to change, this text was a good fit for me - God centered, not Christian (I’ve got Jesus issues). The lessons align well with 12 step recovery. 

It was also recommended to me that I listen to Reeger Cortell’s Weight Loss Surgery Podcast. I started on episode 68 and worked my way backwards, listening to a podcast while commuting. I swear this is a gem of a resource - so much information from medical and psychological specialists (such as Connie Stapleton Phd, Randy Seeley, Ph.D, Dr Walter Medlin ) and authors like Michelle May - am now reading Eat What You Love - Love What You Eat. As a former psych. major, I really dig Why Diets Fail (Because You're Addicted to Sugar): Science Explains How to End Cravings, Lose Weight, and Get Healthy - the research compilation of Nicole M. Avena Ph.D. LOVE her panel discussions on You Tube!

The podcast also interviews many wonderful people who had been through the journey and had great experiences to share such as Nikki Massie (blog Bariatric Foodie) and Rob Portinga of the Former Fat Dudes Blog and so many others.

I’m most grateful for the interviews with Dr Duc Vuong as he has information as well as the nearly daily Periscope, Facebook Live and YouTube videos have given me the most information on how to successful before, during and after WLS. His text Ultimate Gastric Sleeve Success: A Practical Patient Guide to Help Maximize Your Weight Loss Results is my bible  - I also love his Weight Loss Surgery Success: Dr. V's A-Z Steps for Losing Weight and Gaining Enlightenment  - great spiritual connections. I am now a Dr. V. groupie! I listen to his broadcasts as mini-inspirations that helps with goal setting. He gives me hope for success and my part in that process. 

I’ve joined a Facebook WLS support group that my Swedish WLC started called The Journey is Worth the Weight and my favorite (due to greater population) - the BBGC Bariatric Bad Girls Club - Lots of good experience, strength and hope. I know that there any many more social media options, but I can get freaked out over post-surgery complications so I avoid these and try to focus on just the phase I’m in - post-op.

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My Physical Struggles Of Being Overweight

This month I've come up against a lot of physical problems resulting from my being obese. Fourth of July I was so hot I had to sit down and take a break on the way to my car. I don't ever remember doing that before. I went swimming and hurt the tendons in my elbow just from treading water. I adjusted my steering wheel up to keep it off of my body. The underwire snapped in my only bra, and it's replacement was 4 sizes larger on my torso. I went to a roller coaster park last week, I wore a long skirt so I wouldn't show my thighs. That was a mistake. By the time I left the park, my thighs were burning, welted, and in so much pain from rubbing the outer layers of skin off of each other all day. I was literally shoving my skirt between my legs to give them a little relief. They are scabbing. Plus, there were rides I avoided, and some that were painful for me to sit in. Not to be abelist, but sometimes I feel that obesity is a disability. There are so many things that I cannot do with this unhealthy weight.