#probably will delete

[meimae]

I'm back just to brain dump online. For years now I've been considering making a Youtube channel, but there was always some kind of hurdle. Creating blogs was kind of a test run for that, even though obviously it's quite a different format. Honestly, it would be nothing crazy, just another way for me to share my different hobbies with people online. Recently, I find myself seeking that kind of satisfaction again, but I'm also put off by how being online in a more public sense has many more implications now than before, not to mention the odds of whatever I upload online being swallowed by the void and reused in ways I didn't intend it to.

I think part of me knows that I've taken a break from running my blog in the first place, because I was reaching the threshold of not being able to keep up with my goals with Japanese. I had to focus on my personal life, education, and work, which were important (or seemed to be important) but burnt me out and also didn't turn out the way I expected it to. There were some wins, but ultimately, I feel empty because a lot of those factors were sets of things I thought would help me, but ended up being a detour that led to dead ends. I'm rambling. Was Japanese a dead end? i don't know. I don't think so.

It was fun and it made me happy. It still does. If anything, sometimes I wake up and find myself spotting opportunities related to using the language that I might have been able to apply for if I had never taken a break.

Same goes for any other thing I'm interested in, but was deterred from pursuing because "you will never make money from that!". Well, I followed the "right" path with a lot of things in my life, and I still feel stuck and not myself.

I'm rambling.

Anyway, I'm not sure what to do. Maybe I'll just revive this blog which not a lot of people see and post about my hobbies here again.

[omens-for-ophelia]

lots of people have said it better than i but

everyone is welcome to feel their feelings about the finale (goodness knows i am grieving) but if you're messaging/tagging rachel, the crew or cast with your hate and fury, making baseless accusations that they did this to hurt us, driving them off social media - you are a stone cold cunt

same goes for attacking other fans for their opinion, whichever way that opinion goes (and i really mean it, ive seen it on both sides) - it's gross behaviour and sorry but aziraphale & crowley would think you're a massive wanker

[yourhoustongirly]

My anxiety is so baddddd

i need my nervous system to just breathe! Or give me a break 🥺

[spideytetsu]

not enough love for small boobs on this app I fear

[whisperedruminations]

truly what value do I hold outside of my body? is to know me to want me less? is there value in the person I am or will I only ever be loved as a concept? what even is the point?

[drowsy-corpsegirl]

Its so cool that, as a tgirl, you can make 1 mistake and ruin an entire relationship and immediately get alienated by anyone close to that person and then become a social pariah all in the span of like 1 hour

[joreuru]

Random suba sketches I forgot about (some of them are old)

[neurodivergentclownpussy]

nonbinary failed polycule ex is having classes at the same technical college as me. many such transgender cases.