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On happiness

The Greek word usually translated as "happiness" is eudaimonia.  Given the contemporary prevalence of hedonistic attitudes about happiness, this may be somewhat misleading. The term means something like "human flourishing" or thriving; this is suggested, for instance, in Aristotle's description of happiness as "living well and doing well"

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Life can always be more fulfilling. No matter who you are. No matter what you've accomplished Dare to be great. Aim to be greater.

Food For Thought

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It's not everyday that people use their heads. Not every decision that they use their minds. And more tragically, not every choice do we follow our feelings.

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Standards we base ourselves on

Who sets the standards for relationships? Who imposes the amount of love a couple needs to have for each other ( let's measure this in doves-so there, I've just invented a new unit of measurement) before they agree upon a relationship? 'We are 5 doves in love, let's get together' '2 doves? Sorry, but I don't think i can commit here' 'We used to be 6 doves in love but now it's just a 4' Indeed, what sets the 'bar' for our everyday life? While our automatic response would be 'Society sets our standards', let's put some honest thought here. First, what is this 'society' we're refering to?

Here are a few definitions I've gathered, credits to the merriam-webster online dictionary.

1 : an enduring and cooperating social group whose members have developed organized patterns of relationships through interaction with one another

  2 : a community, nation, or broad grouping of people having common traditions, institutions, and collective activities and interests

3 : a part of a community that is a unit distinguishable by particular aims or standards of living or conduct : a social circle or a group of social circles having a clearly marked identity <literary society>

  4 : a natural group of plants usually of a single species or habit within an association

  5 : the progeny of a pair of insects when constituting a social unit (as a hive of bees); broadly : an interdependent system of organisms or biological units

  We can safely rule out options 4 and 5 in our current usage. (Unless the dear reader is a tree, in which case, disregard my earlier statement.) For the rest of us, I think the first definition bears the most relevance. A 'cooperating social group' with 'organised patterns of relationships through interactions with one another'. Humans are social creatures. What kind of behavior makes a gentleman a gentleman? How do we classify someone as gentlemanly? 

Here we have Mazlow's Hierarchy of Needs, developed by the psychologist Abraham Mazlow in the 1940s and expressed in simple pyramidal form. Our most basic needs are the base of the pyramid. Safety is set on the second tier of the pyramid and love/belonging in the middle tier.  The basic instinct of any creature when threatened, most cleverly demonstrated by our dear friend the chameleon, is to blend in with it's environment. Safety is to be found in being around a large group. Easiest done by mimicking each others attitudes and behaviour. Of course, in doing so, we also fulfill our need to belong, somewhere, some place. So i think I've just answered my first question. We get into a relationship to feel a sense of belonging. We belong together.  We separate what we determine as a passing fancy from love based on society's norm for love; We might eventually adopt my use of doves as a unit of measurement after all!

But now here's a follow up. Now we know why we have standards as a society, why aren't we mindless (okay maybe not mindless, just blind) carbon copies of one another? This question, I feel, is best answered by our individual thresholds for the fulfillment of our own needs; Those of safety and belonging. People that stand out will be scrutinized, they will be judged, they will then either be accepted or outcast in our eyes. That's where we have terms such as 'weird', 'hipster', 'cool' and even 'visionary'. Contrarian investing is a good analogy here. Investing against the masses. A successful contrarian investment could net a huge windfall, but at a high risk- You are, after all going against the majority of the market. Some people are built for this. The majority are content with average returns en masse. Do i dare to think differently from the rest? Will I still be accepted by others if I think this way? How much do I care about blending in? Start asking these questions the next time you make decisions that are more than just a fulfillment of our herd mentality. Nay, start asking yourself at every turn; 'Am I making a choice out of my own logic processors, ethical code, philosophy and rationale, or am I just the blind following the blind. Put some thought.

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The poet's function is not to lead people out of confusion or be a moral arbitrator but to see his imagination become the light in other people's minds.

Wallace Stevens

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Wanderer's Dichotomy

So here we are. Again; In wonder or in a daze. I have with me two paths, a fork, but not quite. As I look ahead,with trembling hands-'what?' What can I do but marvel; What a beautiful spectacle. The clock's a'ticking, My hourglass. 'Hurry, hurry.' Before it's too late- decide. Deicide. Move on, hold on. To kill an ideology is not easy. 'So do I go up or stay; stay here, on level ground?' I hear Myself say. Insinuating in deed. To make a choice is tough indeed. The clock's a'ticking, My hourglass. Sand falling, Falling, falling.         Trickling.                    'Trick,                     trick'

I can't see what lies beyond. I can see what holds. What I've passed I don't know. What I shall see i will know. Soon. Let me give you a proposition. When you have a goal with no map. Left with nothing but a compass. What indeed. 'What will you do?' Decisions, decisions. Don't quite dare to delve. 'How?' How indeed.

The clock's a'ticking, My hourglass. Time waits for no man. Time is scarce. Time to move. We are all but travelers In this world among the sands. We plot our journeys and make our hikes, After all; 'Not all who wander are lost'. -jingjie

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Looking back, I realise that it wasn't rage that motivated me, though I hid behind anger to avoid certain truths about my life. I remember once walking down the street, when I came across a tree growing in the pavement of a parking lot between cars. My first reaction was to look at it, study it, wonder. I thought "How is this possible?" But I wasn't in school, I'd never learn these things.I smashed the little tree because I knew I'd never go to school. There was no room for wonder in my life.

And untitled entry by Jarvis Masters in Finding Freedom

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When I am getting ready to reason with a man, I spend one-third of my time thinking about myself and what I am going to say and two-thirds about him and what he is going to say.

Abraham Lincoln