today i co-facilitated a 1 ½ hr LGBTQ+ & Gender-Expansive Youth presentation/workshop for my colleagues. there were almost 70 people in attendance: some i work with daily, some who kinda knew me, some who may have been seeing me for the first time. this was the face they saw, this was the look i served, this is what was presented along with the presentation. this included me sharing explicitly that i am a non-binary trans person, and some of my lived-experiences. it was nerve-wracking to be that vulnerable and real (i called my look “tropical Mimi Bobek” in front of our CEO RIP!!! ☠️) but i feel so happy to have done it. i know i post a lot of feelings, stories, experiences, etc etc but i am not particularly fond of putting everything out there for people who aren’t my “friends.” lately, though, i’ve been practicing a lot more radical vulnerability. especially at work. it’s scary and unnatural to me, my introverted lil scorpio ass. like most of the pics i take of my looks are at home, in the safe space i share with my friends, so i go largely unchallenged on that front. i’ve been pushing myself more lately to show up as myself, however i choose to do so that day, whenever i can. it feels… good. i also try to ground myself during moments of insecurity and anxiety, to keep in mind that this is important work; whether it’s the workshop and the information it gives to colleagues and allies, or whether it’s being visible, it’s doing something. it’s (hopefully) giving visibility to a previously ignored and invisible population who have such a rich view and experience to share. it’s (hopefully) changing and expanding minds, and it’s (hopefully) going to leave the world better off than it was when i was growing up. sometimes all i have is hope, and lately i have a lot of it. hope and pride. 🤍
