I'm Ray and my blog is mainly about motorsport, writing and the occasional random thoughts.
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Writing Masterlist
[You're also very welcome to requests ships or trops anytime]
The riders special talent
Valentino Rossi's academy of (supernatural) riders
Pedrenzo
Angry teen (Dani dealing with deaged Jorge)
Together we're old and sappy (Dani being insecure about his age and Jorge helping)
Let me take care of you (Exhausted champion Jorge with domestic fluff)
Surprise (Jorge gets home early from a gp while Dani is already retired)
Take care
A perfect night to be honest (young pedrenzo realizing they're both in love with each other )
New priorities (Dani deciding not to do a wildcard due to certain life changes)
A letter from the past (Dani finding a letter written by Jorge in 2003, adressed to him)
Take care (deaged Dani AU)
Black cat magic (cat shapeshifter Dani AU)
Picking you up from a party (Jorge picking up Dani after a Honda party)
Suck my dry (Jorge Vampire AU)
Lazy morning cuddles (excactly what the title says)
Grey hair (Jorge discovering that Dani died his grey hair)
Just yes (Dani promising Jorge a reward if he wins the 2015 championship)
I peeled an orange (Dani reassuring Jorge he isnt angry with him after a crash)
Drunk with a candy ring (After THE pedrenzo press conference in 2012)
A sting because I care (Jorge makes sure chronically ill Dani takes his meds)
Only one bed (Jorge is having a gay panic because... there's only one bed)
Silly shirts, silly husbands, silly son (Jorge gets a cute picture of his husband and his son)
A little reward (Dani is testing for KTM - smut)
The involuntary truth (Jorge is on truth serum)
I bow to you so take my hand to let me rise again (masked singer AU)
Once upon a time.... the little samurai (Jorge tells their baby Dani's life story)
The moment in between (Bez and Marc are having some dirty talk after the sprint)
The cursed God (Marc is scared before the race where he may become champion)
Please don't leave (Dani is insecure at his 40th birthday)
His little family (Dani had a kid with Jorge)
I can't give you more (divorce)
Between the land and the sea (mermaid Jorge/ human Dani)
Marcmarc
Why can't everyone just go away? Except you, you can stay. (Bez frustration about his season turns into anger, Marc is there for him)
Lost podium (Bez loses a podium and Marc is a tease)
Soulmate AU (in a world where soulmates have matching symbols tattooed on their skins, Marc makes an interesting discovery)
5.5 years (Marc overthinking their age difference)
Thai hotel (Marc surprising his boyfriend by pulling him into his hotel room when he passed by)
Not without you (cyborg AU)
Pre season comfort (conversation about the 2025 season which is about to start)
Two birthdays (Bez trying to make it to both Vale's and Marc's birthday party)
Wrong phrasing (Bez gets angry when Marc implies that the aprilia is a bad bike, pre 2025 season)
He love you, idiot (Marc being jealous of Bez's friends, Alex setting him straight again)
I wish I could believe you (Pecco says he is hooking up with Marc. But Marc and Bez are dating.)
happier than I have ever been (Marc and bez make out after being on the Assen sprint podium together 2025 until the door opens...)
The smell of you (!!!omegaverse!!! Marc is suddenly more aggressive towards Pecco)
Actions speak louder than words (Bez won in Silverstone. Marc congratulates him)
New doesn't mean bad (Marc's reaction to the new hair cut)
I watched from afar how the ink on your skin grow (young Bez and Marc)
I'm still rocking your hoodie (A/B/O)
A full moon night (werewolf Bez)
Cum back (9th title celebration - just smut)
Rosquez
My baby, my baby (David Alonso as the child of the rosquez divorce)
A family in a motorhome (happy child of divorce 2014 snippet)
P14 (child of divorce future with David in moto2)
A family matter (Marc winning the 9th title in child of divorce AU)
Monsta (Vale's NSFW thoughts)
Burning house (impact of the rosquez divorce of the academy, told by Luca)
Rampage (the brothers witnessing the rosquez divorce)
Your silence worries me (Marc is a little too quiet)
Thunderstorm and children's laughter (Rosquez dealing with deaged academy)
Vegas reconsilation (unfinished)
What if he had been honest (Marrc cuddling with werewolf Vale)
A christmas call (Vale playing with his and Marc's daughter when one of his boys calls)
Visiting an old friend (Vale goes to Sic's grave to talk)
A cozy evening, wine and a kiss (rosquez first kiss/ date during reconsilation)
I'd let the world burn for you (Mafia AU unfinished)
The worries of a brother (Vale gets a call in the middle of the night, it's about his brother)
Baby brother (ft. de-aged Luca)
Don't break his heart (Pecco think Marc might be cheating on Vale)
Jolex (Jorge L. x Alex M.)
Addiction (Jorge and Alex relationship start in 2015 and how they deal with the events of the year)
Things you said I wasn't meant to hear (Alex talking to himself, Jorge overhearing)
Beznaia
Satisfied (Beznaia - After Pecco's title there's only one thing or better one person left that he wants - Bez)
A kiss in the darkness (Bez and Pecco going on winter holiday together and things don't go as planned)
Lucalex
Even the cold melts with you (Luca and Alex having hot chocolate)
The perfect birthday present (Vale has a special surprise for Luca's birthday)
The haunting face of a 19 year old (2015 Alex finds himself in 2025 ft. Rosquez)
Bezsava
Wrong Lorenzo (Marco tells Vale about his new boyfriend and things don't go as expected)
In a dark alley with you (Sava surprises his bf)
Others
The photo (Luca Marini x Marc Marquez - Luca sends a clearly romantical picture of Marc and him to Vale)
Telling his grid dad (Pedroscar - Oscar tells Mark about his relationship with Pedro)
His boy (NOT a ship - Vale taken care of deaged Bez)
The right kind of comfort (Bez gets a release from Vale after a bad race - Vale/Bez)
Hallway (Pecco x Marc after Pecco crashed out the Sepang 2024 sprint)
Things you say when you are drunk (Fabio/Luca - Luca admitting he's jealous caus Fabio Q. is close to Vale )
The brothers (Marc being a protective older brother over Alex with some Alex and Luca interaction)
Teammate memories (Luca/Bez - Bez wishes Luca was his teammate again)
Sleep deprivation (Alex & Marc - Alex overworking himself and Marc not knowing how to help)
Pairing: female!potter(james’ sister) x Tom Riddle
wc: 3.9 k
Summary: In the past, the reader hadn't hope to fall in love with him, their goal was to prevent the rise of the Dark Lord but nothing seemed to go as planned when they are sent back into the future. In the months following the return, Tom Riddle continues to haunt their nightmares and their new reality as he closes in on them. How can an old love cause so much harm?
Trigger warnings: brief mention blood but not highly graphic
part 1 | part 2 | part 3 | part 4 | tbc
Maybe time favored her, maybe it hadn’t but as the spring days passed, the memories and nightmares slowed. My brother had unwillingly given back my locket, only Evans could be thanked for such an action. However she convinced him to. To my surprise, the enchantment on the locket sealed the portrait shut against all attempts from the boys to discover further information. We had reached a weird sort of relationship, where the boys were stumped with my situation and had put it to a temporary rest in favor of Peter’s own growing relationship with Fabian. Hardly any new information helped stall them, all around with worrying over exams and attempting to chase the last years of our youth we got ourselves into more mischief than we could maybe put up with. The only thing standing in between our summer were the looming tests and the last few weeks of class.
When we walked into the DADA classroom, a dark brown wooden cabinet chest stood in the center of a cleared out room. Desks were gone, as they had every other Thursday when objects or creatures were brought in to learn how to property battle against. As the student filed in before the class began, “Any ideas of what resides in this cabinet?” our professor called out to us. Hands rose calling out, cursed objects, the unrested souls, dryads, banshees, and fairies were all amongst the guesses but by the end all were met with a “no”. She began, “Today’s lesson will focus on not what we can do against the Dark Arts but what we can do to protect our own minds against them. How might we work to prevent the uncertainty and danger of our world if we cannot face our own issues? The Dark Arts targets one’s own weaknesses, to use them against us in hopes of weakening our resolve.” Glancing around the room she shooed us back to make room in the center, “We will be dealing with a boggart, this creature works to twist one's own worst fears by taking on their shape. The only way to properly deal with one is to laugh, we must all fight our fears by casting a riddikulus spell and laughing.” the class nervously glanced around.
“Now take out your wands,” she said, “everyone must repeat after me riddikulus.” a classroom of students repeated after her. “Which one of you wishes to begin?” her eyes swept over each individual. Five hands shot up, “Nersen you’re up, everyone form a line starting by that pillar” she pointed her wand to the left.
Students rushed, some crept to the back like I had but slowly the line would begin to dwindle. A new boggart appeared each time, from the fear of heights, to more physical things such as sharks or spiders, to grim depictions of a loved one's death or bloody scenarios which caused one boy to faint.
Each one was far scarier than what was humanly fathomable, and as each one passed a sinking feeling grew, a voice called out snapping her out of a trance, “Mrs, Potter? You’re up”. Willing him to not appear, she bravely walked in front of the prying eyes of her classmates to stand it in front of the looming chest. The whole cabinet shook, uneasing them once more as her Professor made eye contact with her to confirm she was ready. As much as she steadied herself, the second the binding was dropped and the cabinet door opened she knew.
As a billow of smoke escaped the cabinet, the whisperers of her classmates' guesses were drowned out by the drumming of her heart beating. Out of the darkness, a figure emerged that truly existed out of the dream realm, Tom had returned.
As young as the day she left him, he stalked out eyeing up the girl. “I missed you y/n,” Tom said as she quickly backed away to distance herself from the man. The classroom fell silent, “you haven’t visited me since you left” his voice dropped as he spit the words with a foul distaste.
“How come? I thought you were better,” his voice shook raising in volume, as all the build up emotions slowly began to engulf her. She was beginning to shake from him standing in front of her eyes once again. “You left me, how could you?” his stride came closer to her. “I waited days which turned to weeks and now years for you, my little witch. Why did you leave me?” an eerie smirk graced his lips. Whispering to her ear, “I loved you, I really did, and you left me” as he towered mere inches away from her.
The classroom around her became a blur as the murmurs grew, the rest of her classmates stepped farther away from the two. Tom leaned away to circle around her, taking in her quivering shape as he idly twirling his wand in the air. Her wand was shaking in her hand, a miracle it hadn’t dropped, her own Professor was at a loss for words in confusion, her friends were visibly concerned but she tried to remember what to do. Steadying her wand, quickly turning around to face him, fisting his robes and pushing him against the wall, “you did it to yourself Tom, it’s all you. I don’t control fate”.
Digging her wand up into his jugular, staring into his eyes briefly looking down to see red droplets of blood fall down his neck, his eyes looking at her curiously but also to taunt her. Giving him one more bitter sweet smile before saying “Riddikulous” and vanquishing him off to the cabinet. Turning around idly the whole class looked at her with wide eyes, what had she done. A resolution grew within her, as the power of her and she ran out of the class. Out of the daze the marauders jumped to their feet and bolted out of the classroom not listening to the calls of the professor. Rounding the corner they had no luck spotting her, Peter pulled out the map before shoving it off to James’ hands. He traced her name as she was running down the corridor in the left wing of the castle towards an exit.
“Off to the Black Lake” he yelled, taking off through a secret corridor sprinting towards where her name was last spotted. Past banisters, classes in session, the four made it out the exit in record time. Taking a breath they spotted her against a willow, they approached her as calmly as they could bear to muster.
Seated on the banks of the Black Lake where she would’ve accompanied him 35-40 years ago, though she sat alone absent of his presence. Hot tears cascaded down her cheeks as they held the entire sobs back. The boys gathered around her, desperate to comfort the shaken girl to the best of their abilities. James took the lead and gently wrapped his arms around his sister pulling her into a tight embrace whispering that everything would be fine. Her painful cries echoed against the wind as the sounds haunted the boys’ ears. Her body shook, hitting her hands against his chest lightly “why, why me” she mumbled hiccuping before falling into his arms. The older Potter stroked her hair softly looking towards the others for what to do, only shrugging in reply having no clue what to do. Bringing his head down “calm down, you’re safe it was just a boggart” she pulled away from him “but it wasn’t James, he’s still out there”.
He grimaced at the reply before Remus spoke, “Tell us what happened, we’re here y/n” his voice was soft and delicate. Wiping her tears away to collect herself, lifting her head up entirely, nodding slowly. “It’s your boggart” James said to which Sirius snorted “obviously” lunging at Black throwing an arm out to whack him on the head. Briefly glaring before returning his gaze “Pads I didn’t finish, y/n who is he?”. Shifting under his eyes Remus spoke up before she could. “He was in slytherin robes, he must’ve been the one to give you the locket and it was him in the picture right?”
Sighing in defeat leaning your head down to rest in your palms “That was Tom” the marauder looked at you curiously as you brushed off the second question. Peter had voiced his own concern “He said he loved you, why haven’t we ever met him?” wondering aloud. “It’s complicated” you mumbled in defeat, they gave each other skeptical looks. Seated all uncertain on how to proceed before Sirius spoke “Why is he your boggart?” voicing the question everyone was thinking, “again. Complicated”. You understood they all held the best intention at heart but all you wanted was to find a place to hide and never see the light of day again. Solemnly looking up through your red eyes, allowing yourself to make eye contact with them as you pushed out of James’ arms and seated beside him completing the circle.
Plucking up a clover in your hand, slowly tearing the leaves apart, accepting the turn of events. “Before I tell you, you must swear on marauders code you won’t speak or tell any of this to anyone else '' you enunciated every syllable twisting the stem in your fingertips. “I’m serious I will hex you to oblivion” glaring at the boys who grew quiet. Moony and Wormtail nodded while Padfoot and Prongs shared a skeptical look, “Why so tense?”
Smacking him in the head “For once in your life trust me, you're at risk just knowing me” they gulped at the honest words, “I don’t understand” Remus chimed in. “You will after you agree to protect my secret, okay?” all of them shared a look before nodding.
Striking out your hand in the middle of the circle “pinky promise me boys'' to which they all agreed to your strange habit. Collectively silencing themselves to hear out the reasoning.
Shoulders relaxing, the tension slowly leaving momentarily taking a deep breath in. “So it’s a lot. The only other person aware is Dumbledore” clasping your hands together, “Dumbledore? This is to do with those secret meetings'' James spoke. Nodding in response “It does'' playing with your thumbs, he grasped them in his hands easing your nerves. “It started after the welcome back feast, I got a letter telling me I was requested in his office. There he addressed his concern on wanting to select me for a mission. Why didn't he choose Aurors? I don’t know, he picked me specifically for some idea I would be ideal. He didn’t brief me on the details until I agreed.” all attention was on me as the words flew out of my mouth, Remus brows furrowing, Sirius nodding, Peter and James hooked on my words slightly widened eyed still grasping it all. So I continued “We had monthly meetings, to fill me in on the task details. I could never tell you guys, it was a rule, sorry” nodding glumly “as pissed as I am you never told me I get it, but what does it have to do with Tom?” Prongs asked.
Huffing and crossing my arms “I was getting there, wait a minute. During the meetings it was determined the day before everyone got back from Christmas holiday was ideal for the mission to occur” the realization dawned on them. Piecing it together with my odd behavior “The day you came back in the afternoon all weird and out of it” Peter said to which you only nodded. “The mission was for me to go back in time to lead a dark wizard away from the Dark Arts and prevent the casualties. All while he was still a student at Hogwarts, with the use of a time turner”. Shock evidently took up their features “Are you kidding me? Dumbledore sent you back in time” Prongs erupted, releasing your hands and clenching his fists angrily. Sirius took a less angry approach “What year?” to which you responded glumly “1943”. You swore you nearly saw James faint “what? You can’t be serious” you only nodded guilty.
Finishing up you continued “My job was to lead the wizard to good, he could have gotten there. We were making outstanding progress, I didn’t mean to get attached” voice slowly cracking “I didn’t mean to fall in love, neither was he” your voice became painfully low and full of hurt. “Tom?” Remus asked softly as you looked up to hold his gaze, the answer was abundantly clear. Yes. “mhm. It was Tom, we fell in love. It just happened neither of us expected it” you exasperated. James as if dreading this day breathed in a harsh breath “and what happened?” he asked shakily. “We were getting close, he was changing. All the previous deaths that would have occurred previously never had to occur, he abandoned his plans due to me and my attempts to save him”.
The details hurt to voice aloud but you continued “one day the time turner broke. I was there in the 40’s one moment and the next I was back here, this time period. Even Dumbledore isn’t sure how it happened. He became heartbroken, raging before he reverted to his old ways. He lost his light, he lost me.” a shiver reverberated down your spine. Death silence blanketed the group, the only sounds heard were the wind hitting the tree branches.
Breaking the silence, Remus started “Tom became a dark wizard, all your efforts were in vain” murmuring incredulously. “So there is no way to go back and save him?” Peter voiced his concern to which you shook your head. “The time turner was affected when it broke and brought me back. The nearest it can bring me back is 1966, but it wouldn’t be worth it since I am not guaranteed I could get there safely let alone return ever or alive at least. The odds aren’t good.” glumly you admitted with heavy guilt weighing you down.
Sirius merely nodded in understanding, “So you loved him, it’s been over 35 years he’s probably over it, you need to move on. You can’t guilt yourself for it anymore. You did your best to save him, that’s all you could have done” he told you, eyes softening when meeting yours. James became unnervingly quiet until he finally spoke “I actually agree with Pads, for all you know he’s probably in Azkaban. Time changes people”. Shaking your head furiously “no. no. no” you quickly pushed off the ground as the grass imprinting on my palms with such force. “There is a reason why I asked you to keep it quiet. He’s not in Azkaban, he’s still out there. He’s killed people James, he is dangerous, I am in danger when he finds me” throwing your arms in defeat “He is a dark wizard but he is also the Dark Lord”.
They all froze again, shock had stolen them in their spots “you mean the dark lord” he asked, “death eaters, dark mark, dark lord?” Sirius added, hoping it wasn’t him. “That’s obviously what she just said” Remus chimed in with a grimace, “Yes Tom is Lord Voldemort” saying the name made Peter let out a squeamish squeak.
James watched her incredulously pointing his fingers accusingly at her “You fell in love with Voldemort?” he was visibly angered and flustered as Sirius hit him in the arm. “Please tell me you didn’t..” he trailed off uncomfortably “with the dark lord” shifting awkwardly. As soon as Remus laughed everyone dissolved in a fit of laughter besides the two Potters “James Fleamont Potter!” you hit his head. “I did not shag Tom” you said turning bright red before mumbling “a pity really he was so fit” to which Sirius howled with laughter rolling in the grass. He threw his hands up defensively “hey I was just being an older brother”, scoffing in response “I did snog him though, he was such a good kisser, oh what I wouldn’t give to shag him” you teased him. He stood and tackled you, kicking him hard before rolling away out of his grasps.
Retreating back towards the group, Sirius voiced his own concern “Can’t you just go to the dark lord, explain what happened, snog him, tell him you love him so he forgives you and stops murdering everyone?” he asked hopefully. Snorting at his comment “A real smart plan you have Black, that won’t work especially since he’s changed, he might honestly want to kill me for breaking his heart. If he knew I existed now he would probably be furious, he always was protective and over bearing of me. I don’t know if I want to risk my friends and family’s lives to see him again” you admitted aloud to which he visibly gulped in reply.
“Well shit, you really managed to get yourself in the worst situations” Remus chided
“I'm a Potter”
“Hey-”
“Don’t act like it isn’t true, first day of Hogwarts, third year during your quidditch match against Slytherin, shall I continue? ”
“Point taken”
Nothing was resolved that afternoon, but such a confession brought together a new understanding between us five. A secrecy of how terrible my situation was, no matter how much we attempted to joke around with the subject we knew it could only add terribly for myself. The dreams were filled with memories of my time with Tom, nightmares appeared occasionally but they hadn’t taken as big of a mental toll on myself as in the past. Evans had intended to confront me on the matter, she really tried but there was no power like that of a Potter who lacked accountability.
Following the incident, I still got weird looks from those who were and weren’t within our DADA class, at times a noisy Ravenclaw would come up to me asking questions. I wished my fear to have been anything else, yet luck was never in my favor. But I would only have to deal with a few more weeks before it would be a distance semesters past.
∞
Staring off into the hazy sky the wind rustled through the blinds of my open window. Peering out to the stars I was lost in my thoughts, mirroring my past routine at Hogwarts yet this time within my own home as we had just left Hogwarts. My own parents still had no clue about the time traveling situation entirely or the whole I’m in a weird intertimeline relationship with the Dark Lord thing. Guilt was eating away at me as I knew I could have been the change the war needed. Dumbledore already requested my presence to meet with him before the school year resumed. The ‘war’ began to pick up as raids became more frequent and whispers of pureblood families choosing the Dark Lord’s side began. Already the ministry was working to cover up the recent muggle and muggle born deaths, only four had happened but it was four more families then necessary. The raids weren’t covered in the Daily Profit but sent as a briefing letter by Dumbledore sent every couple of weeks. He seemed to trust the wizarding world was good enough in my hands, for what odd reason to trust a legally seventeen year old even if I have lived longer than that.
The scarier part of it all was the owled message I received this evening from Regulus. Ever since my encounter with the boggart, I decided to also confide in the younger boy over my cryptic relationship with Tom. In exchange, he had fully trusted his own secrets in me. Written on the parchment was a short message:
‘I have found out my parents have discussed the need for me to be branded with the dark mark. They discussed it over dinner and decided I will be marked on my sixteenth birthday over the yule holidays. I do not want this, we need to speak soon in person. I am afraid mother might begin checking the owls if we keep writing so often. ~ R.A.B’
My heart felt heavy when I received the message almost immediately penning a cryptic message back on a loose sheet of parchment. Scribbling fast ‘My summer holidays started off well, I have fully caught up in all the readings, especially the books you’ve recommended. Will you come over soon? I’m sure you can floo over by the fireplace or maybe have a relative apparate you over. Anytime before 11 pm works, maybe tonight or when you are free. ~ R.” knowing he would get the message. The hours began to tick away as I awaited for the night, bringing up to know I stood in the center room. The first floor was silent as luckily everyone was residing in their rooms.
The fire cackling caught my eyes as I paced forward meeting the newly shaped face in the hearth. “Ah reggie” I said, visibly a grimace in displeasure overtook his features. He seemed half asleep with some recent circles under his eyes “y/n, so what was it you needed me for at this hour? And what was that shitty letter about?”. This kid never seemed to let me play into the cautions always with his Black dramatics and not a single care. Letting my idea come to light I spoke “You don’t want to get marked, and I found a way to solve it. It’s time”
“Time for what exactly? What are you getting at?” he grumbled as his form began shifting in the fireplace as if pacing his room. Smooth silky pajamas hugged his frame closely as his lanky body took long agitated strides. Waving him highness’ attitude I continued my “I'm going to write to him”. Stopping dead in his tracks he threw me a glare to mimic even mums, letting his emotions proceed to get the best of him. He couldn’t even attempt to hide his blatant dislike for my idea but I wasn’t going to let his righteousness affect my plan. “That might be the stupidest thing you’ve ever said. That’s entirely suicidal not to mention insane, you can’t possibly think he won’t kill you on the spot” chiding at me as if I was the younger one out of the pair. But I was fed up with it as my voice rose in agitation, “He won’t he cares for me” and I could already begin to hear his laugh. I kept eye contact with him as the words flowed out of his lips, “This is the most idiotic thing you’ve told me” he said almost pausing for me to get offended.
“I've heard that before, not a surprise” I said, arching my eyebrow enough for him to visibly see. Leaning closer to me in this fiery image of sort his jaw clenched not in anger but my so called ‘stupidity’.
“You can’t be serious”.
Without further patience, I tried to control my own temper. “Regulus, I will be safe, you shouldn’t worry. I knew it would come down to this anyway. It will be up to me, but I will be okay and I promise you that.” she said, hearing the familiar creek from the staircase. “I can’t talk any longer. I'm sure one of them will be down any second”. I could make out his mutter curse words under his breath as he gathered his thoughts once more. Speaking up, “Fine you stubborn girl, don’t you dare die…you’re the closest I have to a real sister even if we aren’t blood. I need you as well to keep my brother alive. Promise you will be safe?” his eyes were desperate as he finally managed to give up his inner conflict. But it filled me with relief, “I promise reg, good night”, finally letting a yawn pass his lips he let out a last “Good night Potter” before swiping his fireplace iron to end the call.
Im so good at recycling (an old scene I have already written and posted here but assumed I would abandon for the main story to make a child of dicorce chapter) wow.
Valentino Rossi's academy of supernatural rider (Chapter 20: Not just empty threats)
TW: mention of suicide, violence, threats and death
Vale was walking through the corridors. He didn’t ask where he had to go. He knew it in an instant. He didn’t even question who he was so sure to find his way in a place he had never been before. He knew where to go and how to get there without being noticed.
And he didn’t hesitate as he pushed the door away. He heard a dark knock as the door hit the wall. It sounded violent. He didn’t care. He couldn’t. He just didn’t had it left in him.
All he felt was pain. He felt hate. He felt fear. He felt the bussing feeling of loneliness in his head showing him that his brother was almost gone. Only his wolf remained. He hated that feeling. He wanted to rip his head open and destroy it himself.
26 year were too short of a time to stop being able to have Luca close. And all he wanted was to hug his baby brother. He wanted to hold him close, give him a kiss on the forehead and tell him that everything would be fine. He wanted to tell him that it didn’t matter who said what about him, because he would never be alone. He would always be by his side, even if the world was against him. Noone could separate them.
Vale wanted to comfort Luca, like he had done so many times ever since the young boy had been born. He wanted to hold him close and protect him from the world. He wanted to dry his tears and distract.
But he couldn’t and as he stared inside the room, he saw the reason right there.
Alex sat up straight, taken aback by the sound. He immediately froze on the spot as he looked up. He felt his mouth hang open and his eyes widen. He was the last person he had expected. He hadn’t expected anyone. Maybe Luca. But he never thought he would see him right now.
There was a lot to say after all and he really didn’t had the strength to say it now. He just didn’t want to deal with him now.
But here he was.
He took a deep breath, ready to say something. He wasn’t even sure what he’d say. He wanted to explain. He
wanted to say they should step outside to give Marc some peace and quiet.
Marc was sleeping. He didn’t want to wake him up right now. He was still weak. Alex hoped the Italian would at least have the heart to leave Marc out of this for now while Dani stayed there to make sure the new werewolf didn’t do anything stupid.
Well and then there was this werewolf issue they had to deal with. So lots of conversations, Alex didn’t want to have.
But why now?
This whole situation seemed to only be getting worst and Alex started to wonder if fate was currently laughing at him with all the different turns his life had taking in the course of 4 days.
He took a deep breath, ready to ask Rossi to leave Marc out of this but he didn’t. He couldn’t. The pure rage on Vales face was enough to silence him.
It was such a raw expression. His eyes cold. His pupils were smaller than usual. He pulled his lips up revealing teeth clearly too sharp to be human. If it hadn’t been for Dani’s explanation that both brothers were werewolf, he would question that.
Rossi was angry. That surely couldn’t be good. The only reasonable explanation would be Luca. Alex assumed he had called him and explained everything that happened.
Luca must have mentioned Marc’s injury, the change, their fight… And for some reason that was enough for the retired rider to just show up.
So where was he?
Had he left him alone again but this time with an angry Vale? It somehow felt like another betray. Like Luca was throwing Alex to the wolf. To Rossi.
“YOU!” the Italian hissed loudly. “You fucking bastard-!” before someone could do anything, Vale was already next to Alex, grabbing him at the neck of his shirt. He pulled him up and pressed him against a wall. His hands were on his collar. He used all his force to press him against the wall.
It was inhuman strength.
“What the fuck have you asshole done to my brother? What have you done to him?” He almost screamed. He pressed Alex against the wall who could help but let out a sound of pain. The cold stones were pressed against his spine.
Vales eyes were wide and crazy. He looked like he was about to lose his mind.
“Vale, calm down!” Dani had gotten up just as quickly. His hand went towards Vales, trying to ease the grip around the shirt of the young man. “Calm down?!” he spit back. The disgust was clear in his voice as his hands reached for Alex jaw.
Violently. He pulled his face up. He pressed the back of his head against the wall. It was a lot. Alex wanted to scream but he felt like any sound would just make this worst.
“I am this close to bite out his vocal cord and fucking swallow it and you’re telling me to calm down?!”
Alex whined. He was afraid. He was so fucking afraid because he believed Vale. He was serious about hurting him. He was already conflicting physical pain and his level of anger was so high he definitely could be able to. And he didn’t know how Vale being a werewolf affected this all.
He wanted to cry. He felt weak. Like a child. He was helpless and he didn’t understand what was even going on. He wanted to be protected and his first thought was Luca. Luca always said he would always protect him. Against everyone and everything.
So where was he? Why was he letting him down? Again?
But Dani was there and he didn’t care about Vale’s strength. Dani was ready to defend Alex against everything and everyone. Alex was his little brother just as much so he took the Italians attack personal.
“Yes I do!” The Spaniard replied, forcefully ripping his hands of the boy. “Because right now you are acting like a stubborn 5 year old that is angry because his best friend talks to someone else. You are a grown man, get a fucking hold of yourself and act like it!” Dani screamed.
Screaming was for the calm man unusual but he would not accept Vale speaking to Alex like that.
Vale slightly turned to him. His murderous glance now directed at the other retired rider. “Careful, Pedrosa. I am much stronger than you are” he said, letting his teeth flash in the artificial light.
Jorge looked from his husband to his former teammate. He would get in between them in a heartbeat if Dani was in real danger. But right now it were just threats and no real risk. And he knew that his husband could handle Vale better than anyone else. Especially like this.
“Try your luck, Wolfie. I am not scared of you.” He replied coldly. He took a step towards him, looking up at him. He pressed him slightly away, giving Alex the chance to make a run. Quickly, he dogged away and fled to the other side of the room, where Jorge put a protective arm around him.
He pulled him close, feeling him shiver for a moment. He wanted to kill him right there and then just for scaring Alex. They wouldn’t let anyone threaten their boys.
“You are just angry because your little brother is in a relationship with someone you don’t like.” Dani said in the meantime. “And I know the Marquez family aren’t on top of your preferred in law list, but Luca and Alex are a great couple. They… It is complicated at the moment but every couple has their fights. I’m sure they’ll-“
“Oh shut the fuck up! You think I care that he is fucking my baby brother right now when he-“ “Baby brother?” Jorge interrupted, his arms crossed in front his chest. They wouldn’t be easy for any of them. “We are talking about a grown ass man. He’s closer to 30 than to 20. Fucking act like it.”
Vale used the moment to give his ex-teammate a look of ‘shut the fuck up’ before he replied with a stern “Baby brother. Still. And he will always be. Asshole.”
“Hold up…” Alex said, after having found the trust in his voice again. “If… If this is not about me and Luca dating- “ He just decided to go along with this version as he had no interest in explaining his dating and moral dilemma to the angry brother of his boyfriend or potential ex-boyfriend. “Then what the fuck is this about?”
Vale went from completely ignoring him to staring at him in disbelief. The look on his face was priceless. He was taken aback by that. The shock or surprise seemed to cover his hate for a moment. Obviously, it had been clear to him that whatever was going on, should be well known to Alex.
“You – You don’t know, do you? You have no idea what you done to him?” There a laugh at the end of his sentence, but it only made him look insane. Not happy. Or relived. It was an insane laugh, like he could believe what was going on.
“What I did to him?” Alex repeated and now he was the one that felt close to insanity. He tried to go over everything in his head. What had he done? He remembered everything and for a second the hurt came back and he just wanted to cry and disappear. But he didn’t. Marc was back. He was save. There was no reason to break down again.
He pulled himself back up. Marc was alive. Luca was who knows where after their fight.
“You have no idea what went down here the last days” he stated, his voice slightly shivering. He was so close to just scream and let all the emotions he gathered during the last days out. But he wouldn’t give Rossi the satisfaction of knowing that he got to him.
“So don’t you dare fucking judge me.” He was proud of himself for standing his ground. He felt Valentino look him up and down. It was a judgy look. He looked angry and just as Alex was about to call it a win for him, the Italian responded “You really are an as arrogant asshole as your fucking brother” and the other froze on the spot. Because what is that even supposed to mean?
“Okay, Vale, that’s enough” Dani said annoyed. “If you’re just hear to insult Alex, just fucking leave.”
“Trust me, I will. I would love to do nothing else but leave but before I can do that, I need to know what this cunt did to my brother that he lost his mind!” “Lost his mind? Are you delusional?” Alex scoffed. This was starting to get ridiculous. There was no sense in his words.
“We had a fight. Okay? Yes, I said some mean things after he tried to murder my brother. Sorry that I have emotions!” he said, his gaze not leaving Vale. Alex was fed up. He wanted to be alone. He wanted to be with Marc, who was still sound asleep, unaware of the events in his surroundings. He wanted to be with Luca and talk everything through. He wanted his boyfriend back. He wanted the relationship back he had a few days ago when everything was good.
Rossi however was not on the list of people who he wanted to deal with.
“But fucking hell” the younger Marquez took a deep breath as he continued. “He is an adult. I am sure he can handle some insult and being yelled at without you playing bodyguard or whatever the fuck you’re currently trying to do.”
“You really have no idea what you did”
Alex was really close to just throw a book at him for his cryptic statements.
“Valentino, I…” he sighed. For a moment he actually considered just calling security and throwing him out. He was very close but he assumed it would just complicate things further. This particular Italian really wasn’t known for being able to handle rejection well. “Luca and I –A lot has happened, okay? You can’t blame me for saying things I shouldn’t have said in anger. You’re the expert in that, after all” “Oh fuck off, Marquez”
He had no hesitation so he just replied with “How many times have you said that, hoping to end an argument” “Careful with your words, fucker” And Alex scoffed at that. That boy was done. He almost lost his brother. The love of his life had lied to him for years. And now he had to deal with Marc being a werewolf and a fucking Italian with anger issues and attitude problems.
“No.” he said, deciding enough is enough. He didn’t act rational. There was no justification for it. So he refused to put up with it. “You come here, in my brother hospital room and attack me. You have the audacity to physically attack me, threaten me and scream at me cause I had a fight with your brother? Grow the fuck up. Luca is an adult. This isn’t pre-school so I am pretty sure he can handle some insults and yelling in a tense situation.”
“What you called being yelled at, caused him so much pain that he has lost his human side which basically equals death for a werewolf”
But that however, seemed like a good reason for Vales behaviour.
Alex brain stopped for a moment. He took the words in. He repeated them again and again. He tried to make sense of them. He tried to connect them with a meaning in his head. Luca lost his human side? Because of him? Which could kill him?
Luca could die? Because of him?
He felt like he couldn’t breath as he understood it. Losing Luca? No. No, please not.
A shiver ran down his spin. Yes. He had cursed at Luca. He had wanted to throw him to hell. He wanted him to disappear so he never had to see him again and deal with whatever remained between them. He only wanted to hate him.
But that was when he thought that he had actively wanted to hurt his brother. Now he learned the truth. Now he knew that whatever he did wasn’t out of spite or hate or to actually bring harm to Marc. It didn’t made the situation easier. It made it worst actually but now he had to deal with it.
“Wait what?” he asked quietly and as he saw how the tension left Rossi’s shoulders, he realized he was just as exhausted as he was from worrying about his brother. Alex saw the hurt in Vale’s eyes the same way Vale saw the fear in Alex’s eyes. There was shock and fear and disbelieve.
“He has lost you” he said, anger still lingering in his voice. It sounded like an accusation. Like he had blood dripping from his hands. Like he was really responsible that Luca might be… Somehow… No longer here.
It sounded ridiculous. But so did the existence of werewolves. Or his brother getting healed in minutes from a fatal injury. So nothing sounded impossible to him right now. “And as much as I hate to admit it” he continued as Alex looked up again. ”Luca loves you. Desperately. You’re his soulmate and he lost you. That… It can drive a werewolf in insanity to lose their soulmate. And if a werewolf goes insane, there is no human left to be saved.”
Too much. There was too much information. And too less at the same time. There were too many worlds that hold too much meaning he didn’t understood. He wanted to ask 1000 question but he feared to hear the answer. He was scared to learn what it really meant.
“I don’t understand.”
Vale sighed. He looked at him. There was pain and pity in his gaze. He wasn’t sure for who it was.
“The pain of thinking he lost you” he explained. His voice sounded on edge. “for whatever reason or in whatever way, was so painful that his wolf took control” Alex wanted to scream and cry. Nothing made sense. This wasn’t right. It didn’t sound like Luca. A part of him was still yelling that Luca was human. But he knew he wasn’t. “Vale, you’re making no sense”
“We balance human and wolf side. But if something happens that’s dangerous, sad or enraging, we lose this balance. The side that can deal better with it, takes control. And sometimes – when the pain is really bad, we lose the connection to the other part of ourself”
He stepped closer. Anger returned to his eyes. All the explanation seemed to shake him up again. Alex swallowed hardly. Whatever followed wasn’t good.
“And whatever you said to him was enough to hurt him so much that his subconsciousness decided that he wasn’t able to deal with it as a human. He pushed him back and locked him out his own had. So right now, my brother is a wolf, hiding somewhere in the woods and refuses to change back.”
“But he can just change back! Let human Luca take control again, push the wolf or whatever away!” he threw back. His mind refused to accept that he might lose Luca. It wasn’t on the table. He had to hold onto that. “He can’t!” Vale yelled back, his anger lurking through again. He stared at him with hate. His face twitched. He was losing control. He looked like a wild animal.
“I lost my brother. Don’t you understand? Are you such an asshole that you don’t understand?” He took a few steps towards him. “Luca is basically killing himself because of you! And what did he do?! Tell me what he did to deserve this? What did my baby brother – MY BROTHER – DO THAT HE DESERVES TO DIE?!”
Tears were shimmering in his eyes. They hit Alex like a tones of bricks. Vale was worried. He wasn’t angry at him. He didn’t hate him for being in a relationship with Luca. And this had nothing to do with Marc either. This was just about them. This was just an older brother worried that he might lose his younger brother, a boy he saw grow up since he was a baby.
It was a brother worrying for a brother.
Alex understood that. Especially after the last days. But now he was somehow responsible for that.
“I… I am sorry” he admitted. Because he was. He had no idea. This wasn’t meant to happen. He was angry but actually losing Luca? No. He refused to. “Oh fuck off. That wont bring my baby back.”
“Vale, that’s enough.” Dani said, taking back more control over the situation at the sight of a devastated Alex. He had seen enough. He had heard enough. Vale wasn’t himself anymore and he was just using the younger one to inflict emotional pain.
“What do you want him to do? Right now. What can we do to help Luca? There has to be a way. Surely you know how to get Luca back? Cause those accusation don’t help anyone”
“Oh they do. They so do… ” He stepped closer to Alex and whispered in a dangerous tone. “If my brother dies, I won’t kill you-“ “Vale shut up” Dani exclaimed. He was ready to punch the werewolf again. “No. Let me speak, Pedrosa or I’ll make sushi out of your husband”
He was being too serious not to take him serious. “So… Alex…” He turned back to him. Slowly. Like a predator, torturing his pray, knowing there was no escape. He took his time. Because he could.
“Like I said before I got so rudely interrupted… I won’t kill you. Don’t worry.” A grin, filled with hate spread over his face. “Instead I will make sure that you know exactly how I feel. I am going to make your life such a hell that you’re going to kill yourself. I will destroy everything and everyone you love-“
He knew he should hold back, but it just escaped his mouth. “You’re gonna kill Marc?” he asked anxiously. “No… That’d be to painless. He will live – for now. Instead I will make him go insane. He will be the monster you saw in Luca but now in reality and it will be so much worse than anything you could imagine. I’ll make sure of that.”
Alex flinched. Going after his brother?
“You see… Marc once told me, back in 2014 that he would do anything to keep you safe. Really sweet actually… You’re very close. But the thing is… So are Luca and I. And I would also do anything to keep him safe. But I would also do anything to revenge him.”
Alex couldn’t breathe.
“If my brother goes insane, it seems like an appropriate payback to turn your brother into an actual monster. A real, feral werewolf with no ability to change back. Luca changed him, didn’t he? So he has not learn how to take control yet. So... No control. No holding back… He’d be a wild animal, still hurt from the change, angry and confused cause he’d have no idea what’s going on. Do you understand? All the primal urges and instincts would be there. But much more aggressive and no natural fear.”
The way he said it, made so much sense to Alex that he was sure he would cry. “How would you feel seeing him like that? Because of something you did?” Marc? Like that? No. No, he had to do something. He had to stop that. He had to prevent this.
“He wouldn’t even recognize you. All he’d see is a source of danger. He’d attack everything and everyone blindly. Even you… Maybe I even get him to kill you.” He laughed slightly and the insanity was written all over his face. He spoke slowly. There was no rush in his voice. Every word was a dagger that he used to slowly kill Alex.
“Oh imagine that… He changes back – And yes I can force that, very violent, very hurtful and harmful – and he’s all alone. He doesn’t understand what happened to him. Or where he is. But there is blood on his hands. He looks down and sees a familiar face – if you’re still recognizable that is. Maybe he doesn’t leave enough of you in one piece that even he’d be unable to recognize the boy he spent his whole life with…”
Not even Jorge was able to recognize Vale as he spoke like that. But it had never been about Luca.
“Marc would think he just killed a random person and he returns, searching for you only to slowly realize that you’re not coming back. Maybe he wonders if that stranger was closer to him than he though. Maybe he spends his whole life questioning if you were that poor soul whose life he ended that violently or if you ran away when you found out what your big brother has become.”
Dani just stood there frozen. There was nothing he could do to stop Vale, as it would endanger them even more to anger an emotionally hurt werewolf. He wanted to pull Alex away and prevent him from listing. But he couldn’t. He couldn’t save Alex and Vale still continued.
“Or he leaves your face more or less alone. You’re staring up at him as he looks down. Still looking up to the golden boy. Right? Older brothers… You kids always look up to them. But even in death? Would you still look up to him if he tears your heart out your chest? Would you forgive him? Cause it wouldn’t be his fault… Right?”
Poison. His words felt like poison.
“But now your body is laying to his feet, bleeding out. You’re completely covered in your own blood. Cold or warm? What would be worst? And the taste of your flesh and blood would still be lingering in his mouth after he tore you apart. It probably would never leave him alone. He would spent the rest of his life knowing how his baby brother tastes… Tell me, Alex… What would do you think that would do to your beloved brother?”
Serious question to the people that are reading/ have read my VR supernatural academy about the point of view it was written -
Did you prefere the version like it was actually written, so "Alex POV" without knowing about the supernatural aspects and then the hospital scene
Or would you have prefered "Luca's POV" like in Chapter 18 first, so more focused on the conflict of saving Marc vs. keeping the academy safe as the actual chapter 5-12.
I literally can't find any of your fics. Can you have them pinned or something??
Oh, gimme some more time, I'm currently trying to finally do a proper masterlist.
So most of my fics on here are either tagged with rays writing or Ray's writing or motogp rpf or the ship name. If you're interested I'd recommend looking with those
