Big Bag of Dicks
Pairing: Jensen x Twin Sister!Reader
Word Count: 2137
A/N – This is my submission for three challenges. 1St – for @roxyspearing who graciously gave me an extension with this #roxy’s spn quote challenge with the quote ‘You’re my brother, and I love you, but you are a great big bag of dicks.’ 2nd is for @queen-of-deans-booty #Jordan’s 2K Fluff Challenge with the prompt wrapping gifts. 3rd is for @imaginesforthose-wholovefandoms #karissa’sgiffollowerchallenge which is the gif below the cut
You knew this was a bad idea! You should have known what he was going to do but you still let him come on this shopping trip with you!
All your life you had known that he was a little shit.
Even when you shared your mother's womb, he would kick the living daylights out of you.
And of course he had to kick you so he could get out first, something he'd brag about still.
Spinning on your heel, you caught him doing the exact same thing you told him not to do a few moments ago.
He was a fucking pain in the ass.
‘Would you fucking stop!’ Exasperated, you punched him as hard as you could in the shoulder.
‘I don't know what your talking about.’ Jensen said, a smug grin on his face. He knew exactly what you were talking about.
Groaning, you threw your head back and looked to the ceiling of the supermarket.
‘Jensen, you’re my brother, and I love you, but you are a great big bag of dicks.’ Pointing a finger at him, you told him that this was not the day to get on your nerves even more. You were already stress that it was December now and you still hadn't bought a present for your mom and dad.
‘Oh lighten up, Y/N/N. I'm just having some fun.’ He tried to reason but it still wasn't working with you. You were pissed and he wasn't making things better.
‘It's all fun and games for you but this is serious for me. This is the only time where I don't have to go into work and spending the day with you guys because my boss is an add. I don't need to add you to that list too.’
You just needed him to stop throwing unnecessary items into your shopping cart. God he was an ass.
You loved him but he was an ass and pushed you to the absolute limit, it didn't help that you were already behind schedule on buying and wrapping gifts.
You knew exactly what to get. Your father had been moaning and groaning about his watch being ‘a stupid, non working piece of metal.’ Your mother, on the other hand, was one that you could make. She usually complains about all of her children, and grandchildren, not being with her all the time. The scrapbook you hoped to make her would help her see that she was an amazing woman and that although her children weren't in the same room at the same time, they would always love her and be there with her, be there for her. You had all the images cut out and ready for her scrapbook, you just needed to find the perfect one for her. Your brother definitely wasn't making it easier, throwing every other food item and artsy stuff into the cart you were pushing.
You were stressed and pissed. Not a good combination when you want Christmas to be perfect.
Was it to much to ask?
Finally, Jensen got the hint; a nose flare and scowl later.
He took the items, that weren't on your list, out of the cart and apologised profusely, seeing that you were close to a breakdown enough to bring you to tears.
At first it was funny, you had to hand it to him but continuously doing it drove you insane.
‘What's next on the list, Sis.’
You scoured the list, all consisting in your scribbles and crossed out items that you had thrown in there already.
‘Um, we still gotta get the veggies, the turkey, the um- the five bird roast that me, you, Pops and Birdie love.’ You pointed a finger to the ceiling before pointing it at your twin brother. ‘Oh that reminds me what do I get for Dani - do you guys need more baby clothes or can I just offer my assistance as the cool aunt slash babysitter.’
Smiling, you hoped that it was enough but were willing to do anything to make your sister in law happy.
He waggled his own finger at you, a lopsided grin, ‘uh uh uh, you’re not getting out of it that easily. You’ll babysit whether you like it or not, Y/N/N. She has been eyeing a dress for quite some time. I would have got it but I’m planning on gifting her another thing. This way you have a present to give her and she’ll think you’re a mind reader but you’ll know that I’m a great husband and listener.’
‘Didn’t I have to tell you three times to stop being a pain in the ass? You’re not that great of a listener.’ You laughed at him as he looked as if he had been punched in the gut.
One week later
A knock at your bedroom door sounded and you rushed up from the floor, watching your step, to make it to the door.
‘Wait!’ The door handle began to open. ‘You’re not allowed to come in. There is a sign on the door!’
‘You don’t even know who it is.’ The voice sounded and you rolled your eyes.
‘You idiot, I do now and I’m wrapping presents, yours included, Jay.’
You knew you should have locked the door the moment he wiggled it again.
‘Jay, I swear to god would you please just stop. I’m trying to do something nice for you and if you ruin it, I will kick you where it hurts most, I will hack your twitter, I will reveal secrets not even mom knows. Do not test me!’
‘You promised me you wouldn’t, we twin shook on it.’ He whined through the door, you could literally see the pout on his face now.
‘Yes I did. But if you try to open this door, mom will know what happened when we were seven and you won’t get any of the gifts I have got for you.’
He was silent and you were sure that Jensen was thinking about what you had said, he was only a few seconds away from giving you an answer.
You knew him well enough, you hoped.
‘Can you at least give me a clue? Then I’ll go.’
‘Nope but you’ll love it.’
‘Fine.’
You quickly opened the door and pressed a kiss to his cheek. ‘Thank you,’ you squealed before shutting the door again, effectively shutting him and the rest of your family out of your room.
Terrible, you were terrible at wrapping gifts, no matter how many times you had tried, it never worked out well for you. The triple rolled and poorly taped gifts would have to do for now. You just hoped that your family would appreciated your hard work.
Christmas Morning
Grunting awake, you lurched upwards, a heavy weight on your stomach.
‘Aunt Y/N/N. Aunt Y/N/N. Wake up! It’s CHRISTMAS!’ Your enthusiastic niece, JJ, squealed in your face.
‘Justice,’ you whined with an exaggerated pout, tucking her dirty blonde hair behind her little pixie ears, ‘please, my sweet girl, five more minutes.’
She huffed, her big brown eyes, which she inherited from her mother, growing even wider. Dammit, why did she have to be so cute? ‘But Y/N, when you say five minutes you don’t mean it. You want longer and daddy said I could have candy if I woke you up.’
‘Jay, did daddy put you up to this?’
Her eyes quickly averted and buried her face in your neck, ‘no.’
‘Uh huh. Tell you what...’
‘What?’ She slightly lifted her head so that you knew she was listening.
Shaking your head at her, you reached over your bedside table and grabbed your phone. ‘How about I lay with my best girl for another ten minutes, huh? We hardly ever get to do this anymore, please Justice.’
‘’kay.’ Thank god it was that simple. ‘Just ten more minutes.’
Setting the timer – to twenty minutes but she shall never know – you put it back on your nightstand and fell back onto the bed, your arm now thrown over the little girl as you snuggled against each other and got just a little more sleep.
A mere five seconds after you closed your eyes, the alarm on your phone went off, you had no excuse for the little Jaybird now.
After silencing the phone, you turned your head to see brown eyes and a smile already wide and greeting you. ‘That took forever.’
You deflated a little. ‘Did you not wanna spend time with Aunt Y/N/N?’
‘I did! But Santa came last night.’ She was bouncing now, on her knees and tapping your palms against your stomach. ‘Can we please go wake the others and open them? Please?’
‘I don’t know,’ your voice a little high as you sung. ‘Do you love me?’
She giggled, gripping your pajama top in her little fists and nodding excitingly. ‘Yeah!’
You tapped your cheek, ‘gotta give me some lovin’, Jay.’
As quickly as you had said it, she wrapped her arms around your neck and kissed your cheek then moved to the other side to repeat the action. ‘Love you.’
Finally, you both got out of bed but she refused to let you go so you carried her to the family room where the rest of your large family were.
‘Hey, look who’s finally up!’ Your twin teased, munching on his cookie, a traditional christmas morning cookie and by the looks of the almost empty plate and the crumbs that coated the corners of his mouth, something was telling you that it wasn’t his first one.
‘Shut up.’ You said to him before you took two cookies. Bouncing JJ on your hip, you handed her a cookie and tapped them together in a ‘cheers’ action. ‘You wanna see what Santa got for you?’
‘Duh!’ She giggled and you immediately looked at her father.
‘Oh yeah, totally your kid.’
JJ wiggled out of your hold, sitting cross legged next to the tree, offering various poses – a range of cute smiles and smirks just like her daddy – at the phone Danneel pointed at her. You went to go sit on the fossil grey armchair, tucking your legs under yourself, resting the cerulean blue cushion in your lap.
‘Dani, gimme the phone and you and Jay can get in the picture too.’
You had the perfect angle from where you were sat, from top to tip the decorated tree fit in the frame, the family of three – soon to be four – picture perfect smiles on their faces.
Jared, Gen, Tom and Shep came over to the house not to long after. Finally, all the children were able to open their presents along with the rest of the adults. You just hoped that everyone liked what you got or made for them.
Even you were excited to open your gifts. Your mom knitted you a thick, warm scarf. Your dad brought you two leather bound journals, The Princess Bride DVD and tickets behind the dugouts to see the Dallas Cowboys. You thanked them both, kissing your mom on the cheek and high fiving your dad.
Danneel loved the dress you got for her, you told her in the card you wrote that it was Jensen’s idea. I wasn’t her only present though, you picked up three of the same sized packages handing them to Jensen, Danneel and JJ, telling them to open them all at the same time.
You smiled in anticipation as they opened their gifts, the colour of the decoration the same sky blue with speckles of gold splattered on them.
‘What is it?’
‘They’re sound waves. Forever ago, I asked all three of you if I could record your voices. I told you all to say I love you. Jensen’s necklace has Dani’s and Jaybird’s, Dani’s has Jay’s and Jaybird’s and JJ’s has her mommy and daddy’s.’ You scratched at the back of your neck. ‘It’s not much but I just hoped that it would-’
Jensen interrupted you, smothering you with a big ole bear hug, one of your favourite hugs.
‘They are perfect, thank you.’
The mug he got you customised with his face on it could never compare to the thought you had put into the gift that you had got for his little family.
He thought your reaction was priceless enough to throw his head back, his action a whole body laugh that turned into a giggle.
It was a good job Jensen and the rest of Jared’s family had pitched in to getting you a fancy camera and those fairy lights so that you could hang it in your bedroom back at home. The piece of thread you had hanging from your walls a little bare. Jensen would just have to make sure that there was enough memories made to fill the strings.
Lemme know what you think... feedback is life
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