Hi, I’m Cyn I’m ANTI AI write/draw it yourself!Sometimes I write 🥰 Always posted on ao3, I made the decision to restrict it to registered users only 🫶 I am a self indulgent writer and I write purely for myself (few exceptions, but even so I enjoy the fics I write for others). I share my fics on the off chance someone else might like them too, I don’t feel the need to defend my choices especially if I don’t know you. If we’ve established a connection, then I’m all for chatting and explaining my thinking. Send an Ask or Reply to a post and we can start there! 😘 I highly encourage writing your own fic, make it how you want. Please don’t try to cater a fic to me (I’m extremely picky) or anyone else. Do it for you! 🩵
I’m very easily set off by the canon ship and my notp. It’s not cool to be rude and leave mean comments. There are people who like those ships and make things for them. I just refuse to engage.
I’m a fangirl first and foremost so I thrive off leaving love letters and reblogging things (primarily on my main account). I only comment on things I enjoyed, I don’t like angst/mcd.
I guess I have to add the super obvious, there are no bad endings in my fics (unless I specify in the beginning and I will tag it cause I know how it feels since I hate reading that shit myself.) if you’ve read one you’re read them all imo. We just take slightly different routes to get to the same conclusion: my ships are meant to be in every single universe and that’s final! I preach commenting because I think it’s the absolute least we can do when an author has done so much by giving us these amazing fics to read, but I’m not someone who needs/wants praise, don’t comment if you’re gonna be annoying. Either read it and move on or just exit the fic, it’s really not that difficult.
Okay I give up, I’m just gonna list all my fics and tag them on this post instead. Again this is for my own personal benefit.
CoAi/ShinShi {grey otp}
Confession Chronicles
Redamancy Series- Promised Protection • New Year’s Day • The Eyes On You • Touch and Stay • Umbrella • Shark Attack • I Love You! • Poison • A Rose by any Other Name • Sunburn • Tip of the Tongue
My Life Turns Your Life Into Folklore Forevermore Series- Folklore Twist • Forever & Evermore • Don’t Blame Me • You Belong With Me? • How Many Minutes To Midnight? • Guilty As Sin? • Ruin the Friendship
Reciprocating Relationship
I Know You
Christmas Fics: Always Choose The Heart • Forget The Fallout, Let’s Be Alone Together • And We Keep Falling • Nothing’s Changed • Angel • Midwinter • All in a Row • Part of the Family
Revised Recollection
Be Mine?
A Kiss For The Obvious
First Kiss
13
Love, Learned
I Can Make Your Heart Race
Such A Tease Series- Play Pretend • Picturesque • DreamOf Me • Devour • Blame it on the Drugs
Irreversible (a kaishi endgame verse but this part is all shinshi, see Run To Change The Endgame)
There’s Nothing Triangle About It
What Do You Want?
Lo Lo Love Me (+) Lo Lo Lost
CoAi Week Things: Superposition • Versus • Critical • It’s You and Me, That’s My Whole World • I Just Want Your 2 Hands On Me • Wishing on Dandelions
I Hate Accidents, Except When We Went From Friends To This (flufftober 2022) • Met You At The Right Time (flufftober 2025)
Kiss Of Life
Public Transportation
Triple Threat
And Another Thing! (Extras/What If scenes from established versus)
Every Dog Has His Day
In(de)finite (yearoftheotp 2023)
Honey I’m A Sucker When You Linger Series- I Only Lie When I Love You • I Wish I Cared Less
Love Me Like You Do (coailovefest2024)
When I Look At You…
Consent and Kisses
Off Limits
Mistake
I Want More
Might As Well Be Drunk In Love
Nobody’s Perfect
I Can Love Him Better
That’s My Man
It Hurts, Doesn’t It?
How Could She!
Inevitable Series- A Moment Of Weakness • Forget Me Not • 7 Minutes in Heaven… • Probably Chemical, Definitely Terminal • Hard Pill to Swallow • The Experiment
Love Me, But Don’t Fall For Me
Proximity
Missed Match? (CoAiHalloween2025)
Play House
Keep it Casual
Stay Away From Her
I Love You, I’m Sorry
Collabs with Vordark, my beloved <3
It’s What You and I Do
1+1=2, x2? (Ongoing)
Baby, It's You
Love At First Sight
WIPs I desperately need to finish…
Point Of View Series- It’s Not Just Acting (Yukiko) • Second Language (Jodie)
Real Or Not Real Series- Rinse, Forgive, Rewind • False Memories
Catch My Lies (powers verse)
[A Marriage Proposal, Or Two- one is kaishi, two is shinshi]
🩶🩶🩶🩶🩶🩶🩶🩶🩶🩶🩶🩶🩶🩶🩶🩶🩶
<KaiShi> {steal my heart ship}
Run To Change The Endgame (ongoing)
All Your Love
Hug Prescription
He’s Funny
It’s Like My Birthday, Except…
A Day Out With The Kids
It Starts With A Kiss
Setup
💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖
(Other Shiho Ships)
Fleeting Feelings (technically an all Shiho ship fic)
Love, It Was Enough To Recognize (AU-gust 2024)
Bro Code (mostly ShinShi but also KaiShi)
❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
Duncney {red otp}
Another Universe (based off Marcy’s Just One Universe)
Shituationship (duncney week 2023 day 7 Aka canon duncney day!)
I Really Wish I Hated You (duncney week 2024 day 7)
Officially completed! Thanks for following this story =)
It takes another year before she finally agrees to move in with him, though to be fair they were basically splitting time between the two apartments. The only reason she agreed was because he surprised her when he mentioned moving to a different building, one that would be closer to Ran’s dorm and the Professor’s house. He rolled his eyes at her when she immediately agreed hearing the location, he should’ve done this earlier. Then again, their relationship moved at a snail pace, his proper confession took another month after dragging her to their first meeting early in the morning. That night there was, you guessed it, another case. He finally gave up on a perfect date and settled for kissing her during his parent’s new year party. Of course he chose to do it right as the countdown reached one, the perfect way to ring in the new year.
“You know, we could be done unpacking if you actually help. I’m beginning to regret moving in with you.”
He smiles then kisses her cheek before moving onto the next box on the kitchen counter. She questions him on the gesture, they’re not the touchy type, but recently she’s been noticing his longing looks. Almost as if he were touch starved, though it makes no sense, they see each other everyday and sleep in the same bed.
“What was that for?”
“Hm? Oh, nothing really. I was just thinking about how lucky I am to have you.”
Concerned, Shiho stops her organizing to walk over next to him. She places the back of her hand onto his forehead to see if he was running a fever. His temperature seemed to be normal, he removed her hand pulling her closer.
“Are you okay Shinichi? Maybe you should go lay down.”
“Is it that hard to believe that I love you?”
“No… it’s just weird to hear you say things like that? I’m not used to it…”
“You’re right, we’re not the type of couple to just say mushy stuff like that, but I couldn’t help myself.”
“Oh… okay…”
She’s embarrassed and unsure of what to say, he’s never found her more adorable. Normally she’s the one to tease him and best him with wordplay, but when he compliments her, she can’t handle it. He knows she still thinks of herself as unworthy of his love, or anyone else’s for that matter. He doesn’t blame her, it just means he has to work extra hard to convince her she’s more than enough.
“Come on, let’s take a break.”
He pulls her to their balcony, another reason she found this place to be appealing. They had an unobstructed view of the cityscape and no neighbors to worry about since the building is new. The winter air is chilly with Christmas fast approaching once more. It’s snowed quite a few times already, surely it would make another appearance tomorrow, but tonight the sky was clear with stars out high above. She smiles as she leans into his warmth, she always wondered how he just seemed to radiate heat when she had trouble keeping still from her shivering.
“I don’t think I’ll ever get tired of this view.”
“Me too.”
She turns to see that he was looking at her, her face flushed. She’s not sure what was going on with him tonight, maybe it was just the merry atmosphere. She was ready to tease him, but a shooting star flew across the sky, he told her to make a wish. She was never one to believe in these types of traditions, but nonetheless she closes her eyes and makes a wish. He has a bright smile aimed at her when she opens her eyes again.
“What did you wish for Shiho?”
“Wishes don’t come true if they’re spoken out loud. You should know this Detective.”
“You don’t believe in that.”
“No I don’t. What did you wish for?”
“This.”
He closes the distance between them to claim her lips in a kiss. Her eyes flutter shut as she melts into the kiss. His kisses start off gentle and soft, then quickly shifts to hard presses as he slips his tongue into her mouth. He has her backed into the railing as she kisses him back tugging on his pullover as she pushes for more. His kisses are addicting, though he could say the same about hers.
The November air is cool, but not freezing out in the wilderness. Camping season ended during the summer, but cabin rentals were still available, a nice introduction to staying close to nature for someone who’s never been the outdoorsy type. There’s always next summer to take her on a proper camping trip, the detective has fallen deep, he’s already making plans for the future though he hasn’t had the chance to confess his feelings. Setting up isn’t an issue, since the large cabin was more than enough accommodation for the three children, the professor, and the two partners. They would only be spending the weekend here, he wishes they could stay longer. She tried to keep her expressions neutral, but her eyes gave her away. She looked around in awe and relished in the feeling of being included on her very first camping experience. As the children immediately ran outside to explore with the professor on their tail, she lingered inside watching them play about through the window.
“You know, I’m sure they would much rather you join them instead of just watching them like a lonely old woman.”
“What does that make you if you’re watching me watch them?”
“I was being polite. I’m waiting to go outside with you, can’t leave you all alone on your first camping experience.”
“We’re in a cabin with electricity and WiFi, I think I can manage.”
“What’s the point of coming if you’re not going to go outside and enjoy being in nature?”
“I didn’t say I wouldn’t go, I just wanted a moment of peace, but I guess that’s impossible when you’re here.”
“Come on Shiho, live a little!”
“Says the man who attracts corpses.”
“I take it back, you’re not cute at all.”
She smiles, and he remembers why he was there in the first place. Their banters always seemed to sidetrack him, not that he minds, but he really does want her to join in on the fun. He doesn’t give her another chance to protest as he takes her hand and gently pulls her outside. She was surprised, but at least she didn’t pull away. It seems they’ve become more comfortable with physical contact, he smiles happy to have her so close. When the children and Agasa saw the two walking together hand and hand, they couldn’t help the grin on their faces. The moment lasts for a couple minutes, then it quickly breaks from the sound of a loud explosion. The two partners along with the rest of their group rush towards the disturbance, they were holding hands the whole time.
Luckily the explosion was far from the trees in an area with only dirt on the ground, firefighters were called to the scene to prevent the spread of the flames. They were too late to save the lone victim inside the small hut, no one else was in sight. An investigation begins. The flames are contained and put out after a few hours work, the makeshift shack was half in shambles while the other half barely stays standing. The police look through the scene for evidence of foul play, Shinichi and Shiho are right by their side. The remains of a workstation engulfed by flames intrigued his partner, but she chose to focus on the unharmed part of the hut. On the opposite side is the kitchen and a messy dining table with some white powdery substance. She calls the detective over to help confirm her suspicions.
“Do you smell anything weird?”
“Besides the smoke, not really… wait… is that?”
“A bleachy smell?”
“Yeah, that…”
“We’ll need forensics to confirm it, but I think it could be potassium chlorate. I’ve only worked with it once, but it can be highly explosive if it’s impure.”
“Judging the state of this place, I think that’s highly likely.”
The case closed with the manner of death ruled as an accident. The victim was a retired chemist who, despite going partially blind still wanted to conduct experiments to better the world. In his old age and slight disability, he lacked the proper equipment and resources to conduct his work safely. Shiho stays silent as she watches the police finish clearing the scene, there’s an emptiness in her eyes as she’s lost in her thoughts.
Leaving the bright sunny sky for the snow covered city felt right. The inviting lights of Tokyo greeting them as they touched down from the long flight was enough to make him feel like he was home, and with his partner by his side, he wouldn’t want to be anywhere else. They didn’t linger much in her hometown, memories of her past kept her down, though she didn’t let it affect how she treated him. All she wanted was for things to go back to normal, she wanted to be away from everything.
The detective is beyond frustrated, it seems his relationship with his partner is going two steps forward and one step back. He’s all but said the actual words confirming his feelings for her, he should take it as a good sign that she hasn’t run away, but he’s getting impatient. Yes he knows she needs time to recover especially after that stunt Higo pulled. Just thinking about the guy puts him in a foul mood, she dropped everything to go to him, it’s clear she still thinks of her former best friend as the number one guy in her life. He doesn’t like that at all. It was bad enough having to compete with him when he was actually present in her life, but now that they’re no longer supposed to be speaking, he still has to worry if he decides to make another appearance. What’s worse though is she tries to act as if everything’s fine, he’s not sure he believes she’s being genuine. He’s never been able to read her as well as she could read him.
“You know, when you invited me out for coffee I thought we would be talking more. You’re not even drinking your cappuccino. What’s going on Shinichi?”
“Sorry Ran, how’s your break so far?”
“It’s going well! Sonoko and I took a day trip down to Osaka and we caught up with Kazuha too. We wanted to invite Shiho, but her phone was off.”
“We were probably on the plane.”
“Where did you take her? I didn’t think she would agree so quickly!”
“It’s a long story…”
Some may think it’s in poor taste for him to be venting to his former flame about the woman he’s actively pursuing, but Ran is his best friend first, just because they didn’t work out romantically doesn’t mean they don’t still have each other’s best interest in mind. He tells her a summary of his past week omitting personal details of course, her story wasn’t his to share. By the time he gets to the part where they kissed, he’s even more peeved about the whole situation.
“I can see why you’re frustrated… but if I were in her situation, I would do the same thing. How is their relationship any different than ours Shinichi? It’s hard to just throw away all those years growing up together.”
“It’s not the same. I wouldn’t put you in that position.”
“But you still hurt me, different scenario sure, and I know you didn’t mean to… it’s not easy to deal with losing someone who was supposed to be in your corner till the end.”
“I know that, but what if he tries again? I always knew I couldn’t make her choose, she wouldn’t choose me. She’s said it herself that she wishes she could choose him.”
“Then you have to ask yourself, is she worth all this stress? She’s a flight risk, you knew this from the beginning. Her heart is guarded, she’s not just going to open up and admit she likes you too, trust me I’ve tried getting it out of her myself.”
“She drives me crazy, but I like that she makes things difficult. I never know where I stand with her… you’re right Ran, I know what I have to do.”
She’s not at his apartment when he returns, he checks hers next, but there’s no one inside. He texts and calls her with no response. Nothing was out of place, if she were to leave surely she would have taken something with her. He’s pacing through the room as he decides what he should do when she texts him back that she would be home late. She doesn’t respond when he asks again where she was, all he can do is wait, at least she confirmed she would be coming back.
When she returns, she smells faintly of smoke and her hair is disheveled. Her leather jacket and riding boots gave her away, he didn’t know she was a fan of Harleys...
22! (As a Swiftie, I have to point out the number)
The fall semester would be over soon with November ending, all that’s left is study week then finals. The detective had been looking forward to the break ever since he got to know his partner more. He had plans to take her places in Japan and maybe even to the States if she wanted to. Now though, he’s not sure how those plans would work. He wasn’t expecting Higo to just drop everything and come over last night, he certainly wasn’t expecting him to just leave after she barely speaks two words to him. She stayed silent after that, she fell asleep soon after, he didn’t dare move afraid she would wake up. She’s always been a light sleeper, she definitely needed the rest with her whole world turned upside down.
She didn’t sleep through the night, waking up every few hours, she never acknowledges his presence though he thinks she goes back to sleep easier with him here. He dozed off for a few hours, sleeping on her loveseat isn’t the most comfortable. He finds himself making a habit of it over the last month. Twilight was coming to an end when she stirs awake, when her eyes open, her expression stays neutral— not a good sign.
“Morning, did you sleep okay?”
He winces hearing the words out of his mouth, that was a stupid thing to say. Clearly she didn’t sleep well, he witnessed the whole thing. She stays quiet, she doesn’t even move to untangle herself from him.
“Shiho?”
She closes her eyes for a moment then makes a decision, she sighs as she slowly pulls herself out of his arms. She heads toward the bedroom, a signal that she’s determined to go back to normal. He grabs her hand before she reaches her door, she doesn’t even turn to look at him.
“Let’s just stay in today, no point in going to class during study week. It’s just going to be reviewing all the materials we covered through the semester.”
She still doesn’t say anything to him, but with a squeeze of their joined hands, she lets go— she gives in. She goes to get ready, he goes to freshen up next door. When he returns, he hears the shower running, he starts the coffee machine. By the time she’s done blow drying her hair, he’s successfully made toast without burning them and spread her favorite jam on them. Normally she would make a quip about how he finally was able to figure out how to feed her properly, but she doesn’t even flash him a smile. She does thank him for breakfast as they sit down to eat.
“You don’t have to stay with me.”
“I want to.”
She tried a few times to get him to leave thinking she would be better off alone, but sometimes quiet is violent. She is the type to run after all. Still, he has no idea what to do to cheer her up, he wasn’t equipped to deal with this type of emotional distress. He knows he needs to ask for help, he somehow managed to get through Monday with minimal disasters. He tried cooking again, which in retrospect was a bad idea, he should’ve just suggested takeout. Then he managed to convince her to go out for a walk where they stumbled on another crime scene, when that past it was way too late to do anything else, so they ordered in since he wasn’t going to make the same mistake twice. She didn’t complain a single time during this whole day, she stayed by his side and just went with the flow— she was just quieter than usual.
The next morning they do decide to go to class, but they quickly realize it was basically optional to attend the last few sessions. He was far enough ahead that he didn’t need to worry about the exam, given her way above average intelligence, he’s sure she wouldn’t suffer either. With this in mind he messages Ran for backup, he was struggling to bring her mood up.
Shinichi: You don’t have class now right?
Ran: Not until 3.
Shinichi: I need a favor.
Ran: Is this about Shiho?
Shinichi: Yeah… you’re right, I’m not very good at these kinds of things.
Ran: I know, but it’s okay. She has us too.
Shinichi: Us?
Ran: Don't worry about it Shinichi, we’ll meet at the coffee shop in ten.
She really was off, she didn’t even comment on his not so subtle texting...
Gloved hands joined as speckles of snow fell from the sky. Winter has always been an enjoyable season for the detective, and now with his partner by his side he couldn’t be happier. They decided to go ice skating with the kids and Agasa, she’d never been before given her stay in sunny California for most of her life. She’s a quick learner after a few pointers from him, she didn’t need him to hold her hand anymore, but she hasn’t pushed him away yet. He glances over to see the knowing looks the professor and children were giving them as he chuckles from the other side of the ice rink.
“What are you laughing about?”
“Nothing really, I’m just in a good mood.”
“It is nice to slow down and not have to worry about anything else.”
“You’re going to jinx it Shiho.”
“You just attract bodies Shinichi, I’m gonna give it a couple more minutes.”
“You’re really killing the moment here.”
“I wasn’t aware we were having a moment.”
They were literally holding hands while ice skating outside with snow painting the background. A scene right out of a holiday romance movie and she says she didn’t think they were having a moment. This woman is going to be the death of him. He opens his mouth to retort, but he doesn’t get the words out when they hear a scream coming from the entrance of the rink. They immediately drop everything to see what happened.
Luckily it was a false alarm, a family thought their little girl was kidnapped, but she was just lost while a kind stranger was trying to get her back to her family. The police weren’t called, once reunited, the cheerful atmosphere returned. The children even made friends with the lost girl as they started to chase each other around in their ice skates.
“For the record, nothing happened this time.”
“Nothing serious happened, but you still had to investigate.”
“I can’t just stand by and watch.”
“I know, and I don’t expect you to. I just like teasing you, I know you’ll always choose to help when given the opportunity. It doesn’t bother me, I actually really admire that about you.”
She said it so nonchalantly while sipping her hot cocoa, as if it wasn’t a big deal. Maybe it isn’t to her, but he’s never heard this validation. He’s never met someone willing to stand by his side when he chases after a case. He knows he made the right decision when he chose her as his partner, no one else could ever compare.
The more time they spend together the more he finds himself in awe at her. He can’t believe someone like her actually exists as she moves about his kitchen preparing a hearty stew when he mentioned he wanted something warm given how cold the weather was. Without another thought, she went to his fridge to see what she could use to make their lunch.
“You know, it would taste better if you helped too.”
“I doubt it, you hate my cooking Shiho.”
“I don’t hate it, I just prefer not to eat it all the time.”
“Same thing.”
“Just come over and help, you’re not doing anything anyways.”
Not true, he was extremely busy watching her, the way she seemed to just flow about his small kitchen with ease. Her look of concentration as she decides what should be prepared first. Her soft voice humming along to her playlist in the background. How she would look back at him every now and then flashing him one of her rare smiles. He could count on one hand the number of times he’s seen her look happy, but ever since she started to move on from the loss of her best friend, he’s seen it more. He would do anything to keep her happy.
“You’re standing too close to me Shinichi, how am I supposed to make sure the pot doesn’t boil over with you right next to me?”
He was invading her space more and more with each passing day. She didn’t seem to mind it though sometimes she would push him away. She usually just lets him take up space next to her, he finds it’s addicting being so close to her. With the way her eyes sparkle as she pretends to be annoyed at him, her soft laughter that escapes when he tells her he likes where he is right now.
The afternoon sun is warm and inviting as crowds of people walk through the mall on a busy Saturday. A perfect day for an outing among a pair of lovers to finally spend some much needed time together. The detective and his girlfriend stroll through the stores as he tries his best to understand the difference between lilac and lavender, and why the former suits her more. His mother would be hosting a party soon to celebrate their successful transition into university, though they’ve only been through a few weeks worth of classes. He stopped trying to figure out his parents long ago, instead he goes along with their wishes which meant his childhood friend turned lover would have to as well. The gathering was still a good week away, but there’s no such thing as being too prepared given his terrible habit of stumbling on cases.
“What about this one Shinichi?”
“You always look beautiful to me, honestly any of the dresses you tried on would be fine.”
“You’re not helpful at all… but thank you.”
“How about we take a break and grab some food, you haven’t eaten anything all day. We can continue looking after.”
Ran reluctantly agrees after her stomach grumbles, she puts the dresses back on the rack then heads out with Shinichi. The two were debating what to eat, though after seeing the lines of people at the food court, they decided to sit in at one of the restaurants instead. Once seated, the detective hears a familiar laugh, prompting him to put down the menu to confirm his suspicions. The two partners make eye contact and exchange smiles.
“You know, I’m starting to think you’re following me Miyano.”
“Yeah, you caught me, cause I have nothing better to do than stalk you on your date with your girlfriend. Nice to see you again Mouri-san.”
“... it’s nice to see you too Miyano-san. Is that your boyfriend?”
“I’m Higo Ryusuke, nice to meet you.”
“Ryu’s my best friend, we’re not dating.”
“Right, Higo-san’s moving soon.”
“I am, so I gotta take advantage of any time I have with Shiho before she forgets about me.”
“You would never let me, and I wouldn’t forget. You mean too much to me.”
“Aw, so you’re really going to miss me Shiho.”
“Of course I am… why wouldn’t I.”
“I’m gonna miss you too, we’ll FaceTime everyday, can’t neglect my favorite girl.”
“You’re lucky you’re cute, or else I would completely ignore you.”
“I knew you only liked me for my looks.”
As the two childhood friends continue to banter, or borderline flirt with each other, Ran starts to feel more at ease. Shiho is so focused on Ryusuke, there’s no reason to worry about her friendship with Shinichi. She was about to whisper to her boyfriend about what a cute couple those two would be when she notices his sour expression. He did not appear to like being forgotten by his partner as she continues to talk to her best friend, and the amount of touching was absurd! Higo would brush Shiho’s bangs out of her face, reach over to grab her hand, and even kissed her on the cheek when he had to excuse himself to the bathroom. The public display of affection was way overboard for two people who claimed to be just friends, what’s worse was that his partner wasn’t bothered at all by it; as if she was used to it.
“Shinichi… you’ve barely touched your chicken. Are you alright?”
“Fine, I’m just not that hungry anymore.”
He’d been pushing the food on his plate around for the past fifteen minutes while the two not couple were making faces and jokes at each other. If he hadn’t already lost his appetite, he would have from watching Shiho feed Ryusuke a bite of her blueberry mousse. She laughed as she made fun of him for being a messy eater, she took her napkin and wiped off the excess jam on the corner of his mouth. The picture perfect image of a happy couple, honestly who would believe the two weren’t together?
“Enjoy the rest of your date Tantei-san. We’re gonna head out.”
Higo waves goodbye while Ran returns the gesture and Shinichi tries his best to flash a smile at them.
The end of summer with August slipping away, the last year of high school is supposed to be the most memorable. Senior shenanigans, stressing over final preparations before college, hangouts with friends— all normal teenage worries. A year of great change before living on your own and becoming an adult, the last hurrah before a new beginning. With her best friend literally an ocean away, she was left alone for the first time in her life. She wasn’t naive, she was on her way to being named valedictorian for her class, but no amount of intelligence prepared her for the emotional manipulation she was going to encounter. From the moment he saw her, he knew he wanted to make her his.
He told her his name was Gin, she found the name to be peculiar, but she didn’t question it. He already captured her attention within just a few minutes into their first official meeting. He knew her parents, he said he worked with them as one of the security guards for the company. This was how he trapped her, lured her in with stories of her parents that she never would have known especially with Akemi’s sudden passing a few years ago. Ryusuke was reluctant to leave her because of it, but she couldn’t force him to hold himself back just for her, he had a dream to chase. She promised she would be able to handle being alone, that was the first promise she ever broke. Next came the lies and deceit anytime her best friend called wanting to know how she was doing. She was in too deep with Gin and it had only been a month into their unusual relationship.
He was an older man, she doesn’t know why he found her to be so interesting, but he became obsessed. She saw all the red flags, but everytime she tried to run, he would keep her tied down with mentions of her parents. She was so eager to feel closer to them, she should have known better. Months passed with their relationship blossoming, the power struggle was evident, he was always the aggressor taking whatever it was he wanted. He would remind her over and over that it was only fair given the information he’s given her about the mother and father she never knew. In the end, he takes everything from her.
The obsessive behavior gets worse after the new year when Ryusuke visits. Gin didn’t like how close the two were, so when her best friend went back to Japan, he made sure to remind her who she belonged to. She tried to break it off the first time he hit her, but he was quick to apologize and gave a sob story on how he had struggled with anger issues. Her mother was the only one to help him, and now that she’s gone, he was spiraling. Even though she shouldn’t, she believed him, too bad he was a goddamn liar.
She lost count of the number of times he would take his anger out on her, littering her body with countless bruises. He threatens to kill her if she ever left, she almost wishes he would, but then she thinks of Ryusuke, she couldn’t do that to him. She vows to get rid of Gin and erase everything he’s ever done to her, she just wants the nightmares to stop. She looks for evidence to help her get a restraining order, her heart sinks once she finds out the truth. This man who claimed he loves her was nothing but a psychopath. He took everything from her, he was the reason she was left all alone. Thoughts of escaping fade with revenge taking place instead. He was going to pay for what he did, she would make sure of it.
It was a week before graduation, when she finally got rid of him, it was an accident. She thinks it’s unfair how easy he got off, she wishes he could have suffered more. He ambushed her in the lab, she told him the night before she would never go back to him, he was seething with anger. If he couldn’t have her, no one else could. It was his own fault really, trying to overpower her while he was high on whatever drug he could find wasn’t the best idea. He was a mad man, nothing he did ever made sense. Why did he think setting a fire in a chemistry lab nearly eighteen years ago while her parents were inside the building was wise?