#regainingfreedom

[crypticnebulaflux]

Flying Away from You

Butterflies are beautiful creatures.

Delicate, light, free.

But it doesn’t take much to ruin them:

touch their wings too roughly,

and they can no longer fly.

I was like that.

A butterfly, right in the middle of my awakening.

I had just learned to love my freedom,

to spread my wings,

to choose the sky.

And then you arrived.

Too tired to fly,

too envious to let me go.

And so, I stopped.

I landed exactly where I shouldn’t have:

in your web.

A trap made of sweet words and half-truths.

You disguised yourself as shelter,

while slowly spinning your threads around me.

Your lies were invisible threads,

your manipulations tight knots around my mind.

You made me doubt myself.

You made me believe I was the unstable one,

too much, too emotional, wrong.

That my sensitivity was a flaw.

That my affection was a burden.

That my loneliness was my fault.

And all the while, you laughed

as I lost pieces of myself.

You turned me against the people I loved,

just to feel important.

You played with emotions,

with people,

as if they were yours to own.

You collected attention, admiration

and even that photo.

The one you still keep,

like a trophy.

A photo of me.

Not as a symbol of something beautiful,

but as proof that you’d done it

you’d caught me.

Because you didn’t want love.

You wanted power.

And I, in that moment,

was too hurt to see it.

But now, my wings aren’t broken anymore.

I’ve learned how to set myself free.

I’ve learned that love doesn’t trap you,

doesn’t confuse you,

doesn’t drain you.

I tore down your web, thread by thread.

I unlearned your rules.

And I started to fly again.

“Rules exist to be broken in order to grow,” you once wrote.

And so I did.

Only this time,

I broke them to save myself from you.

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82 and 73? ;) xx

73. Have you ever cried because you were so happy?Yes! I haven't in a while, though.

I already answered to the 82, and my answer involved loads of chocolate, he he!

Thank you so much, and happy Easter my dear! <3

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regainingfreedom replied to your post: If I ever wanted to make a funny joke to someone I...

HAHA THAT’S BASICALLY THE BEST TEXT POST I’VE EVER READ HAHAHAHAH

YOU HAVE THE BEST SENSE OF HUMOR BBY <333

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regainingfreedom replied to your photo: SIOBHAN!!! LOOK!!!  <3 <3 <3  My day has just...

ugh i wish they’d sell these here in estonia too asdfghjkl but damn gurl you’re lucky

I feel you, I wish they'd sell them in Italy too! I got them on iHerbs though and I believe they ship their goodies to Estonia too! c:

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south italy and estonia!! :P

Estonia: Do you think people often misunderstand you?Yep! But it's mostly because I hide a lot from people and I don't like to talk about my problems.

South Italy: What is your favourite part of your personality?I'm very talkative and I can make people laugh! 

Thank you so much for asking! <3 

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17, 27, 133, 144? ;)

17. Do you think there is life on other planets?Yes, I do. I think the Universe is way to big to be understood by the human mind and there is definitely the possibility of life on other planets, even if we may never find out about it. 

27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker?Nope! I like my skin, actually. I am quite pale, but it also gets tanned very easily and never sunburnt so I really can't complain!

133. Favourite lyrics right now?Love Will Tear Us Apart by Joy Division, always and foreverrrr~

144. Dark, milk or white chocolate?Dark, all the way! I hate white chocolate and I am not very fond of milk chocolate either, but dark chocolate (with hazelnuts!) is one of my favourite foods! 

Thank you for the questions, bby! <3

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Got tagged by Alysa and Laucution! :)

Rule 1: you must post the rules Rule 2: answer the 11 questions and make 11 new ones Rule 3: Tag 11 people  Rule 4: tell them that you’ve tagged them

Alysa's questions.

1. what do you use to carry things? a backpack, a big purse, small purse, wristlet, wallet, anything?

A big leather bag which I probably should reorganize because it's a mess. 

2. what was the last movie you saw in theaters?

Haha, this is embarrassing. Troy. A couple of months ago, it was a replica at the local movie theatre. 

3. how long have you had your tumblr?

Since late August, but I started using this blog only back in October.

4. do you use any other social networking sites other than tumblr? (facebook, twitter…those ones?)

Nope. I deleted my facebook almost one year ago because I got sad every time I checked it.

5. what is your favorite day of the week?

Uhm. I don't know... Maybe some random day like Wednesday, because the best things always happen when you aren't expecting them.

6. have you ever had surgery?

Yep! Quite a few, actually.

7. what was your favorite year in elementary school?

Third one!

8. does your room have carpet or wood floors?

Wood floor.

9. if you celebrate halloween, which costume has been your favorite?

I don't celebrate it. But my favourite costume would have to be my own face in the morning! 

10. where do you like to shop for clothes?

Mostly at Zara, H&M, Pimkie, and a couple of shops in my town and near my uni.

11. what is your favorite holiday? Summer holidays! 

Laucution's questions.

1. If you could have one superpower what would it be? Travel back in time! Or reading people's mind, even though I'm afraid it would be more harm than good to me.  

2. Would you rather have no kids or 12 kids? No kids. I wouldn't be able to keep myself sane with 12 kids (and also, giving birth 12 times doesn't sound like fun to me).

3. Any hidden talents? Haha, I don't know! I always brag about my ~wonderful talents~, I don't think I have any hidden skill left! 

4. What was your first job? Baby sitting and tutoring kids. 

5. One TV show you watch religiously:  I don't watch TV apart from this cheesy italian soap opera I and my Mum watch every night. The acting is horrible, and the plot is full of clichés, but it makes us laugh a lot. 

6. Favourite aspect of your personality (Pick one!!) I can make people laugh and it makes me happy. Quite selfish, though. 

7. Favourite meal of the day? Breakfast. I bet you didn't see that coming.

8. Favourite day of the week and why? 9. Where do you get most of your clothes? Already did these two! :)

10. Describe your style in one word? Lazy. Which can also be applied to most of the things I do. I'm the kind of girls who always wears leggins because it's like going around in my pijamas. 

11. Best thing to happen to you in the past 24 hours?

I realized that my Mum will support me no matter what. 

My questions:

Do you have any pet animal? 

What's your favourite colour?

Would you rather being alone or with someone who loves you endlessly but you don't love back?

Sweet or savory?

Do you like reading, and what kind of books or comics do you like the most?

What are you studying or planning to study at uni? 

Have you ever dyed your hair, or would you ever dye them? In what colour?

What is your own (physical or not) feature you like the most? 

Do you have any siblings?

What is your favourite place to spend your spare time?

Do you remember your dreams or always forget them in the morning?

I tag: Lynn (semiquietgirl), Maggie (bluexlips), tomorrowfatewillgetonmybus, Maria (regainingfreedom), , Siobhan (i-am-not-over), Angharad (recoveryislife) gaining-life, Alex (im-undone), Sofia (loveyourselfandpeanutbutter), Lea (farfromtheshore), positivpessimist. 

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regainingfreedom replied to your post: My Mum just told me that she thinks I am anorexic...

oh baby :s sending you so, sooo many hugs right now

I'm not feeling really bad, I'm just really confused by all this situation... But thank you so much, you're a sweetheart! <3 xx