Rezoobled thoughts - why I am deviating from the pilot.
So the TADC pilot has always been a bit rocky. Not without its perks, but I think we can all agree that it was kind of a mess. Really, ep.3 is more of a proper introduction to the show.
Anyway - I've read a lot of TADC fics, and the chapter I always skip is the pilot retelling/introduction. (It happens a lot in fics sometimes, understandably, because authors want to set up the world and its rules, etc).
I think though, for my "pilot" of Rezoobled, I'm going to go in a completely different direction. I already have to redesign the interior of the circus, which will take some work. I'll probably try and find some real architecture for inspiration, so I don't have to build everything from scratch. But there will also be a different "tone", atmosphere, feel. I'm thinking of maybe including a POV sequence of what entering the circus actually looks like, with trippy headset visuals. I'm imagining pure black except for two dots (the eyeholes) combining into one, and then having that one circle (like a peephole with the circus inside) rushing at you at a terrifying pace, like a jumpscare, swallowing you whole. Um...
Yeah, so, I'm thinking of a complete overhaul. The only elements I'll keep are the really important ones. Different events and scenarios, a different "in-house adventure". Zooble finding the exit door/having a breakdown in a completely different way.
I don't want it to be boring, because no one wants to reread the OG pilot in script-form (with minor alterations, zooble MC, Ping, no gangle/pomni). So it should tackle 2 problems:
°learn from the problems that the OG pilot had, instead of repeating them
°do something different, fun and experimental that is (hopefully) a nice surprise for the reader. Kinda thinking of the Twilight Zone right now, but there's lots of good inspirations to look at.
Rezoobled thoughts 24th April - Ragatha and Zooble idea
Just had a great idea for a Ragatha/Zooble plotline (and a way for them to bond). Ragatha (and the others) haven't had any "adult fun" in the circus since they came here. The stupid sauce in the fast food adventure was the closest thing to drugs/alcohol, and Caine didn't realize he broke one of his own "family friendly" rules when creating the modifier, having never tested it himself. He just treated it like a dizziness mechanic in videogames.
Although Ragatha isn't proud of getting drunk on stupid sauce at "not-spudsy's", secretly, she really misses the feeling. Ragatha never did drugs as a human, but liked to drink socially, and now has no stress relief in the circus. Zooble has taken recreational substances before - gotten pretty burned by it, but as they got older/more experienced, they learnt as a human not to indulge too much in dangerous substances.
Anyway, Ragatha really needs stress relief, but she's too embarrassed to ask Caine for stupid sauce, and the humans are afraid that Caine will catch on and realize this isn't a "family friendly" thing. Ragatha is ashamed at herself - she shouldn't need to rely on something like that to feel better. Ping doesn't know - Ragatha won't even tell her. Zooble finds out and decides to help Ragatha.
Zooble and Ragatha will go on a fun heist (and Ragatha will learn that it's ok to be "bad" sometimes). With Zooble's game breaking skills, they will figure out how to distract Caine, get back to the not-spudsy's map, retrieve the stupid sauce, and then have a great hang out and get blitzed together.
Ping will help distract Caine and maaaaybe Queenie will help? Ping probably won't have any stupid sauce, I think. Ping is already a very depressed person, and I can imagine that she wouldn't want to become an alcoholic/become dependent on alcohol/drugs. Maybe Ping has had a bad experience with alcohol before. But it's also a great opportunity for Ping to be proactive and not lounge about in sadness - she has a responsibility, and she's gonna make her friends happy.
I like this idea! 🥰 Can't wait to start blocking it in more detail. No setting ideas yet - just gonna mentally label this as "Ragatha/Zooble heist adventure" for now.
I'm making another change to my outline. Queenie and Kinger have swapped places now (and Queenie's personality is combined with Scratch's). 👇
Considering that Kinger is so beloved by the fandom, making him the "dead husband" will probably have more impact anyway. No one cares enough about Queenie beyond what she means to Kinger. This role suits her MUCH better.
Also, hey, sympathetic but flawed mothers? We don't have enough of those at all! Mothers are usually perfect or evil in most media.
Jax's negative character arc is that him *choosing* to treat his fellow humans like toys only makes him more like Caine. Which is ironic, considering how much Jax hates his captor (yet also wishes he was "unfeeling" like Caine). This is the negative consequence of Jax's actions. Ironically, acting like the only thing that matters is "fun" only brings you closer to the person you hate the most. The one who "runs the show". The one who stole your life from you.
But this is what you wanted, right? After all, the circus is just a game. Why won't the other humans just let go and enjoy themselves?
Jax: Come on, guys, nothing matters!
(Pushes Ping off a cliff) Stop being such buzzkills!
Caine: Wait, so you *like* the circus? 🤩 Oh, Jax! I knew you'd understand! 🥰
REZOOBLED THOUGHTS (17 April) more Zooble personality
Thinking about Zooble, it's not the first time I've thought about them breaking Caine's games/adventures. I think about "The Stanley Parable" a lot when thinking about Caine and Zooble, but I also think the idea is a nice expansion of Zooble's character. Zooble is rebellious. They are tired and short-tempered and yet - somehow - not cynical. Pretty amazing, honestly. Zooble's been put through the wringer and probably has the worst "body" of the bunch (in terms of ease of movement/quality of life) and yet Zooble is so gentle. They treat everyone like people. They treat people seriously, even though they're all stuck in a cartoon.
Um, I'm rambling again.
ANYWAY - Zooble playing Caine's adventures in an "unintended" way isn't a new idea. I've been mulling it over for a while. Zooble is good at being flexible - they think outside the box, they see the big picture, they are the rebellion and chaos that counters Caine's "order" (linear storytelling, play the game as intended, etc). And of course, Zooble is *literally* non-binary. Not "black and white*. Jesus, TADC, talk about missed opportunities for metaphors here.
But I've been looking at some ideas people have - x reader dynamics. People tend to get creative with those. And I was wondering (GOD, get to the point already) what if Zooble was a gamer?
Is that a good idea?💡I thought it might be an interesting trait for Zooble, and I like the fact that it actually connects with the setting. Zooble challenges Caine's idea of "fun", and what it means to have fun. Caine getting nervous when Zooble is breaking the rules, going out of bounds, causing funny glitches. I like the idea that Zooble has a sense of humour like that. Zooble isn't always taking the game too seriously. Caine is too precious about it. Awwgh, my adventure, my baby! You are such a drama queen 🙄. But it's good for Caine to leave his comfort zone. And although he wouldn't admit it at first, Zooble is actually really unpredictable and exciting. Scary! But exciting. Zooble is really fun to watch...and maybe Caine can let go and forget for a second, about being in charge. Chill out for once. It's actually no fun, you know. Always knowing what's going to happen. Micromanaging everything.
EDIT: Ooooh, I know another interesting headcanon! (Yeah, I might project my adhd onto Zooble, idk). What if Zooble has an addictive personality, and used to be addicted to videogames? (That's one of my flaws, haha). Zooble has a lot of great hobbies (sculptor is a great suggestion) but in the past, Zooble struggled with videogame addiction, and it affected their productivity and ability to do their hobbies. Because of how it mixed with depression and that short-term reward/dopamine feedback loop. Before the circus, they actually overcame that addiction and were on the way to doing great things. Except now, of course, they're in the circus.
I also read a great Zooble fic where Zooble struggled with long-term romances, often having one-night stands because it was easier. Zooble feeling like they were "too difficult" for romance, sometimes.
I know that some trans people have experiences with videogames, in terms of creating avatars. That people have "egg" moments, you know? That when given the freedom to create their body, it doesn't match their "flesh body". Was that an egg moment for Zooble? Then the frustration of being "Zooble" - they're in a videogame, and yet they CAN'T choose their body here, just like the real world. A reminder of past dysphoria maybe?
I do wonder if Zooble ever actually reached self-love, in the real world. I see a common headcanon that before the circus, Zooble was already expressing themself and comfortable in their body, but I wonder if that's the best route? What if Zooble was still a "work in progress" before the circus, and joining the circus only made them feel back at square one?
Well, I didn't mean for this to be another tangent about being non binary. I *really* don't want that to be Zooble's entire personality. So - gamer Zooble. What do you guys think? I'm really eager to hear your thoughts. All feedback welcome. ✨💐🐝💖
Rezoobled Thoughts - Ragatha's mother (and other details)
Finished cooking! Now it's time to cook fr 🔥✍️
Ragatha's mum - Cheryl Bishop
I'm not particularly interested in writing wholly-bad mother characters. That isn't to say they don't exist - but they are over-represented in media.
So, Ragatha and Cheryl don't have a "Mother Gothel/Rapunzel" dynamic. Is Cheryl a bad mother to Ragatha? Yes. Does Cheryl love Ragatha very much? Also yes. Cheryl always wanted children. Ragatha's dad doesn't actually love her - I'll go into why later. Cheryl ultimately ruined her relationship with Ragatha, but also, the circus cut their time short, thus ending any possibility of reconciliation.
°Cheryl is too cold and Ragatha is too warm. Cheryl thought Ragatha to be an overly sensitive child, and was alarmed by Ragatha's strong feelings. Cheryl never learnt how to express her feelings growing up; she's good professionally, but expressing friendship and love is hard for her. She tries, but it's very awkward. Cheryl, like many women from older generations, was pressured very much to be feminine and warm, which caused a lot of discomfort and "performance anxiety" for her. Cheryl is not a very touchy-feely person by nature, which makes it hard to connect with her daughter, who very much needs physical affection, words of affirmation, and warmth. Cheryl sometimes felt "burnt" by Ragatha, overwhelmed by her being "clingy".
°Cheryl thinks she wasted her life. Born and raised as a rich girl, she spent her youth ignorant, bored and carefree. Growing up in comfort meant she never learnt any skills, or anything practical/worldly. Then - cold, prickly Cheryl fell in love with a man who was her opposite. (Not sure of his social standing yet). She fell in love with Ron; an easy-going, charismatic man. Ron was fun. And for the first time, Cheryl had fun too. Ron and Cheryl became fast friends - best friends even. Ron valued Cheryl's logic and coolness. Cheryl felt like she wasn't being judged, like she could be herself - Ron wasn't pressuring her to be more feminine. They got married.
°Unfortunately, the honeymoon period couldn't last. By the time Ragatha was...hmm...5 years old? The marriage fell apart. Ron was a closet gay. Cheryl was heartbroken; the only man she ever loved would never love her back. Ron panicked before the wedding night, but he never told Cheryl. He led her on - had been leading her on, for many years. And worse, instead of letting Cheryl divorce him, Ron wanted to keep the charade going. He threatened Cheryl, saying that both their reputations would be ruined if they broke up. Ron wanted to keep meeting men and come home to Cheryl's nice, rich home. Of course, there's nothing wrong with being gay, but Ron never wanted to have any hard conversations about anything. Ron lived a double life - he played the "perfect straight man". Regular job, regular wife, regular life. Then he would be absent from family life, hooking up with guys and drinking through the night. Of course, he never made any real connections with men either. Whenever anyone got too close and asked "what are we?", Ron would just ditch them. Ron was never good at being kind to the people he loved.
Ron was too cowardly to be out, but he didn't want to let Cheryl go. Despite everything, he loved her - not as a wife, but as his confidant. Ron regretted treating Cheryl badly, and apologizes. Ron and Cheryl *should* divorce - he just didn't want to let Cheryl go because he needed her. This triggers something inside Cheryl - she needs to be needed. She feels bad for Ron. So, despite her unhappiness, they both agree to stay married. Cheryl wants to be there for him - and Ron will apologize over and over, while he leaves Cheryl to raise Ragatha, sneaking off to parties constantly. Ron lives in the moment, and returns home guilty, constantly cracking jokes. But he never makes any real changes, which only makes Cheryl resent him more.
°Ron never wanted children, and Cheryl did. Soon, Ron's positivity and "fun" personality began to wear on Cheryl. Ron never took enough responsibility; always late, always making excuses. Ron got to have fun and be the "good cop", while Cheryl was left with all the hard work of raising their daughter.
As a little girl, Ragatha preferred her dad - he wasn't a killjoy like Cheryl. He was fun! Always making the tone lighter, doing fun things with Ragatha. Why was her mum always so sharp and bitter? But as Ragatha grew up, she realized a lot of things. Ron never gave Cheryl a break. He always made mum sad. And actually, Ron was a pretty shitty dad. He'd swoop in and act like the "good guy", but he was never actually there for Ragatha. Cheryl and Ragatha had a strained relationship, but at least Cheryl tried to be there for her daughter.
°Cheryl and Ragatha - Cheryl pressures Ragatha to be "better" and ruins Ragatha's childhood.
°With Ragatha, Cheryl saw an opportunity to raise the perfect woman - in a sense. Someone better than Cheryl in every way. Someone who wouldn't be trapped in a relationship with a man-child like Ron. Cheryl never gave herself enough credit; she learned to work (and loved it). She learnt many new skills and rose the ranks at her job - not bad for a know-nothing rich girl. But she went completely overboard with Ragatha. She was going to teach her everything - sewing, cooking, social etiquette, emails and paperwork - everything. Ragatha was going to learn to work and she was going to *like it*. It was for her own good. She wasn't going to let Ragatha into the world helpless and relying on men, like so many rich ladies do. Ragatha needed to be independent. And of course, Ragatha never understood that as a child. Cheryl was never a good communicator, so Ragatha felt like she was being punished. All Cheryl did was pick at her constantly, like she was obsessed. Always telling her what she was doing wrong, how to improve. Ragatha cried a lot.
°Cheryl bottled up her emotions, which backfired spectacularly. She didn't have a problem with anger when she was younger, but she lost her temper with Ragatha many times. She felt guilty, but she didn't always apologize when she needed to. It was more like "I'm sorry I hurt your feelings - even though I'm trying to help you. I wouldn't be a good mother if I didn't care about your future".
°Cheryl was also a drinker (like Ron) but did her best to hide it. Ragatha still found out eventually. (Ron would never find out). Ragatha became very guilty, however, because she liked her mother better when she was drunk. Cheryl loosened up and stopped criticizing Ragatha; her coldness melted and she expressed her love freely. She become much more openly affectionate, hugging her daughter and stroking her hair. Cheryl did swear a lot when she got drunk, which Ragatha didn't like. Ragatha never liked harshness, and the swearing ruined the fantasy of a "perfect mother-daughter bonding moment".
°Ragatha's people-pleasing is a bit of an oddity. Her mother was blunt and never tried to please anyone. Ragatha's dad wasn't a people pleaser exactly - he was just uncomfortable with negativity and preferred to avoid confrontation. But he wasn't self-conscious, or the type of person who made himself smaller for others. He was cheerful, and quite nihilistic. When he wasn't feeling guilty, he was quite gleeful, and a bit arrogant. He liked acting. He liked getting away with things. Ragatha felt like she *had* to be positive. Although Ragatha was a sensitive child (and struggled with rejection) she was quite a mature, sweet girl. She saw, subconsciously, that her household lacked emotional stability. Her mother was not good at regulating her emotions, instead stuffing everything behind a cold, sarcastic wall. Her father was cheerful but self-absorbed, and not very reassuring. His go-to response for anything negative tended to be something like "well, life's shit haha. What can you do?" To compensate (and for her own sanity), Ragatha learnt to be emotionally intelligent. A strong pillar of support - life isn't all bad. There are still moments of happiness. People just needed help seeing the good, sometimes. Ragatha found it helpful to appreciate the little things in life. Her parents only ever seemed to think about what they *didn't* have. Ragatha wasn't going to make herself miserable, like her parents.
°Ragatha's mum also made a lot of mean, borderline homophobic comments about her father. Ragatha is a lesbian - but she grew up with a lot of internalized homophobia. This is probably going to tie into Jax at some point, since in my rewrite, Jax is gay.
Well, that's all I can think of, so far! Let me know what you guys think. I dunno why, but it's much easier to lock in when I listen to "Better Call Saul" music XD I had a lot of fun writing this. Didn't expect to feel so bad for Ragatha's mum, honestly, but here we are. If you guys have any criticisms/suggestions, let me know.
1) imagine how impactful it would've been if the humans actually had a developed relationship/history with Kaufmo. Kaufmo abstracts in the first episode, and then comes back in the middle of Caine's breakdown/spiral into madness. But the audience/humans don't know that Kaufmo isn't real. Caine 'brings Kaufmo back' (as an NPC) as a last ditch effort to please the cast. Maybe Kinger too? (Kinger is the dead one in Rezoobled).
2) this idea's a little different from the other ones - considering that humans can 'conjure' too, what if humans could conjure subconsciously, if they think about something too much/until it feels real. Sort of closer to the IHNMAIMS videogame, where people the circus humans used to know pop up in random places, like adventures. And then the humans are like, what the hell Caine? They want an explanation. And Caine won't give it to them because, well, he can't tell them that *they* can imagine and conjure too! That would make Caine obsolete! So he's like, ha ha, yeah, sorry that was me, I thought you'd like it. My bad! And then when it *keeps* happening, Caine would claim that it's just technical difficulties.
On the other hand, I'd have to explain why this conjuring of past humans is only happening *now*, after Zooble's joined the circus (as MC). Is it because Zooble joining has made the humans want to reflect/remember their past lives more? Is that a decent enough explanation? I'm not sure...I need to think. Maybe non-circus humans/memories appearing in the circus is too literal. Maybe I should keep the real world as references and metaphors embedded in the adventures.
