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The Lily of Bangtan | Kim Namjoon

—pairing • rm × you (fem!reader)

—chapter four • counting down: the days before forever

—genre • mafia au × arranged marriage au × bestfriend’s brother au × strangers to lovers au ( angst × fluff × romance )

—series • matters of the heart in the mafia

—story masterlist • the lily of bangtan

—previous chapter • chapter three

—rating • mature-rated

—wordcount • 7.3 k

—chapter warnings • kiss that nearly turns into something more but gets interrupted, a very unfortunate toe-stubbing incident, lots of drinking and drunk behavior, second-hand embarrassment levels of awkward, unresolved tension all around, family arguing + unsolicited opinions, and your fiancé mysteriously missing the day before the wedding.

—author’s forenote • hi! i’m back! this one’s a bit of a filler chapter, i won’t lie—but there’s more going on in the next one, i promise! i did tweak the ending of the last chapter a little, so if the beginning here feels off, that’s probably why. also, i’m sorry if this isn’t exactly what you were expecting. but please check out the endnote when you’re done—I’d really love to hear what you think. this chapter might feel a little slow, but it’s kind of the start of namjoon doing better. quick note: you’re referred to as nari/lily, and jangmi is also called rose. and no, you’re not imagining things—I did post yesterday, but tumblr ate half of it and wouldn’t let me finish. this version should be complete now and hopefully with fewer errors, lots of love, aksh 💕

—chapter summary • you struggle through your engagement party, caught between exhaustion, tension, and an undeniable pull toward your fiancé—ending the night with an almost-steamy kiss, while the day before your wedding arrives with namjoon nowhere to be seen, though he makes sure you know he’s thinking of you.

“Here’s your drink,”

Namjoon tilts his head, smiling with a teasing glint in his eyes.

“—you look like you desperately need it,” He slides you the drink. You had just taken the seat next to him at the bar, after a quick run to the restroom.

“Thank you,” You say gratefully.

You did need a drink, the kiss had left you wet and dry at the same time. You take a sip, rolling the drink around in your mouth.

“You are too far away,” He says, watching you from the rim of his glass.

“Hm?” You look at him, feeling the alcohol burn your throat.

“This,” He mutters, moving to grab hold of the bar stool you were sitting on and drag it to him. You yelp in surprise, eyes comically wide as you scramble to stop yourself from falling over.

“Wha—”

You are holding on to your stool with one hand and the other holding his arm as he drags the stool and you across the floor, you can feel his muscles flex under your fingertips.

For a good second, your mind runs —wondering about all his muscles, how good they’d look flexing without the clothes obstructing your view, the clear strength lying beneath his honey-skin, the ways his body could be put to use for your needs and pleasure. You were very near gone, when he grins and his dimples show.

“There,” His dimples grow deeper, and he whispers. “All better.”

You nod a few times, momentarily forgetting your words. You take another big sip of your drink, trying to clear your throat and ease your body of the weird tension you had been feeling since the balcony.

In the time you were gone, things seemed to have escalated a bit. People were beginning to get very drunk, and the venue was steadily becoming more of a club with the older guests leaving for dinner.

Just from the looks of it, the afterparty was going to be crazy.

If it had been any other party, you’d have stayed back and gone crazy, but now, you aren’t all that interested. It was like your brain had done a lot of work and while you weren’t tired physically, you were mentally drained.

All you wanted was a bath, a bottle of wine and your own company.

"When can I go home?” You ask your fiancé. You empty the drink, setting the glass back on the table.

“The party’s barely started, sweetheart.” He leans in closer, using his index finger to caress your cheek delicately, “What do you mean you wanna go home?” He says, his voice soft.

“I’m tired,” You whine, making a face. “—and this party is boring.”

“This is our engagement party, you know.” He reminds you, tone bordering amusement.

“What does that have to do with anything?” You scoff. “A boring party is a boring party. It doesn’t matter who it is thrown for or hosted by.”

“Do you not want to eat anything?” Namjoon asks you, taking a look at your empty glass and back up at you. You should be touched that he thinks about you skipping dinner, but you are not.

“You must be hungry from all this,” He gestures to the party that’s beginning to rage.

“I’ll just order room service,” You answer, waving off any concerns he might have.

“So, you have it all planned?” He tilts his head, to take a look at you.

“Room. Food. Bed.” You recite your plans happily and he sighs.

If you look deep into it, he sounds disappointed. But before that thought comes to your mind, he stands up.

“Come on then,“ He pushes forward his arm, asking you to hold it. "I’ll take you to your suite.”

“Really?” You ask, eyes wide because you weren’t expecting him to actually let you go. You take his arm, “I can leave?”

He nods, and you stand up. “No one will say anything if it’s me taking you away,”

“Why?” You can’t stop yourself from asking, eyes wide with mirth and curiosity, “Because you are the next Don?”

“Partially yes,” He nods, smiling smugly. He leads you away from the bar, around the loud guests and out of the crowd. “But mostly because you are mine anyway.”

You roll your eyes and turn your face away from him, “I’m not yours.”

“Of course you are,” He laughs, shaking his head like you were cracking the funniest of jokes. He holds your hand in his, bringing it up to kiss your fingertips. “You are mine and mine only,” He winks and adds as an afterthought, looking ahead. “For this lifetime at least.”

“For the next then?” You challenge.

You don’t know what you want him to say —if you want him to say that you were only his, this lifetime and the next or that he didn’t care what happened to you in the next. You look at him expectantly, as he leads you out the entryway, towards the elevators.

He stays quiet, looking thoughtful and once you enter the lift, he finally talks.

“You tell me,” Namjoon says, turning himself to you and leaning against the elevator wall. “Will you be mine in the next lifetime?”

You look up at him, the sudden turn of questions startling you. You remain quiet because you don’t know what he expects out of you.

Should you be honest?

Will it be a lie to say you would want him in the next lifetime too?

Will he even want you in any lifetime?

Wasn’t this marriage a fulfilment of duty to him?

Something he owed to Bangtan —a strong and capable Madam?

You think about what might be the right and honest answer to give.

What do you really think would make you want Namjoon in your next life?

To Namjoon though, the answer seems pretty clear.

In this life, you have no choice but to be his. Next life though, you’ll probably be the captain of your own life, would you be his then?

Namjoon doesn’t like the way his heart sinks because a part of him knows you wouldn’t choose him. He’d rather hear a negative answer from you, than hear his own thoughts about why you wouldn’t want him in the next life.

“Depends on how you treat me this lifetime,” You say carefully after a minute, looking at him with equal parts amusement and sincerity.

Because honestly, you didn’t have much against Namjoon.

Did you love him?

No, but you could see yourself falling for him, if he treats you like you want to be treated —like an equal, like a woman, like his wife, like someone he cared for.

Namjoon carefully considers your answer, then asks again.

“Am I treating you well so far, then?”

“You tell me,” You mimic him, tone and body, “Are you treating me well so far?”

The elevator dings and the door opens. You walk out first, leaving Namjoon to follow you to your room. You are walking ahead a few steps, when he wraps his palm on your wrist and pulls you back to him.

“I think—” You turn to him, with a questioning gaze.

His expression is serious and unreadable. You are all ready for another talk about how you were expecting too much and the bullshit but he surprises you.

“—a little work is needed.”

He looks down at you deceivingly soft and sincere, scanning your face to scale your reaction. Your eyes widen in genuine surprise and delight, because even the consideration that he would try to do better is a huge step in making the future a happier place.

While this wasn’t a big deal to anyone, this was still a win to you.

“You are a smart man, Kim Namjoon.” You giggle, laugh bubbling up —unrestrained and loud, that Namjoon follows you right back. Your face is scrunched up in happiness, head thrown back.

Namjoon knows the situation or his words aren’t all that funny but you must’ve found some amusement from them, because he feels this odd need to keep you laughing and happy.

“That I am,” He agrees, chest puffing up in a funny manner, eliciting more laughter from you.

“Yes, yes,” You concede, laughter waning, “—you are a smart man.”

A comfortable silence settles between you as you come to a halt right in front of your door.

“Well, this is me.”

You gesture to your door. He nods, gesturing to your door as if asking you to open the door. You swipe the keycard, the door unlocking and swinging wide open. You step in, the air heavy now that you two were separating after a pretty good time. “See you… tomorrow?”

“You don’t want a goodnight kiss, baby?” He asks, stepping into the room and leaning against the doorway.

“Do you?” You cock your head and move closer to him. He takes a step towards you, meeting you halfway.

He nods, “But I want you to say it."

"Kiss me,” You whisper, hands easily finding their place on him, as he pulls you closer, planting his lips on yours.

His lips are soft but he runs them over yours with a firmness and heat you’ve decided that you like. He captures your lips between his, laving them with affection and attention. He pushes you to the wall, pressing himself against your softer body.

The contrast of your softness to his firmness, your delicate build to his strong one, the chill in your frame to his delicious warmth, the light, floral scent of you to his musky, blankety cologne —everything about the two of you in this position, bodies pressed at your intimate regions ignited your core.

You are barely holding onto your sanity when he pulls away, leaving you panting.

“Have I told you yet?” He asks softly, slightly panting his words, “You look so beautiful tonight.”

He rubs his large thumb over your heated cheeks, cupping your face. Your cheeks burn harder, as you feel your heart soar.

Before you are able to say anything in return, he latches onto you again. He moves from your lips to your jaw to your neck, suckling harder, determined to leave marks.

People need to know you weren’t available and that you were his.

You are mewling and squirming under him, clearly willing to take things further when the loud ring of your phone startles you. You tap on his shoulders, wanting him to move off you.

“Ignore it,” He mutters between harsh sucks to your skin, “It can wait.”

“No.” You gasp, as he nips at your sensitive skin, “It-It might be important.”

“More important than me?” He pulls away, hands cupping your face, looking meek.

You roll your eyes and push him away reflexively, running away to find your obnoxiously loud phone. You curse when you stub your tone on a table, and you hear a careful and are you hurt from Namjoon but you wave him off, stumbling in pain.

When you do find your phone on a side table, the call is disconnected. You groan, opening it up to notice Jangmi’s name in the missed call notification.

“Are you okay?” Namjoon had followed you to your bed, “Who was it?”

“Your sister,” You say, wincing as you climb on your bed. You might’ve to check on your toe after this. Namjoon rolls his eyes at the mention of his beautiful sister.

“What does the brat want?”

“What do you think she wants?” You ask, curiously.

This is the first time Jangmi is brought up in a conversation between the two of you and you are interested to know what he thinks of Jangmi, to know his side of the sibling dynamic.

“Stalker information on Taehyung, what else.” He sighs in mock disappointment. You begin to try and support your friend —stand up for her like any other friend from the slander her brother is going to put her through, but he stops you.

“Don’t.” He raises a palm at you, “We all know she’s calling you for that very reason.”

You lean back, because honestly, he was right —partially. But you didn’t want to give him the satisfaction of being right.

“Maybe she just wanted to congratulate me—”

“No need to stick up for her,” He shakes his head, “We both know she’s only calling to know what Taehyung did at the party tonight.”

“Maybe she wants to check up on me, we are best friends after all.”

“Whatever helps you sleep.” He grins mockingly. You roll your eyes, because you don’t have an apt reply. He studies your silence, then grabs your hand, pulling you to him. “We can continue—”

“No,” You snap, smirking, “I need to talk to your sister first.”

“Why?”

“To give her stalker information on Taehyung, of course!” You smile wider, pushing him away. “You should go, Namjoon. Good Night.”

“So you are choosing the other Kim.” He says, his tone indignant.

You only smile innocently. “Obviously.”

Once you had carted a reluctant Namjoon out of your room, you dialled your best friend. You prop your phone on a pillow, so the camera caught your view. You lean against the headboard, waiting for Jangmi to pick up.

“Finally!” Jangmi exclaims, “Took you long enough to call me back!”

“I had to send Namjoon away—”

“What? He came to your room?” She gasps, clutching her hands to her mouth, “Why? Wait— Did you just come back?” She asks, and you nod, “Why? You don’t know your way to your room? Did you forget?” She asks, snickering like it was a very funny joke.

“Shut up if you want to know about your Taetae.” You threaten her, and she promptly shuts up, pouting and glaring at you.

“I did not call you to only know about him,” She tries, but you raise a palm as if to stop her. “Your brother doesn’t think so,”

“He’s a filthy liar,” She accuses. “I wanted to check up on you. You are one step away from becoming my sister-in-law and Omma’s been sending me pictures of the two of you lovebirds at the party, I just wanted to see it for myself,”

“What?”

“You two, Mr. Kim Namjoon and Miss Baek Nari looking like the next power couple and cozying up—”

“What are—”

“No. No-no,” Jangmi raises her finger as if to shush you, “Nuh-uh uh,” She wags her finger at you, “—you and my brother very much looked ready to explore each other on the very couch—”

“Stop. Stop. Stop.” You flail your arms, as if trying to stop the words from entering your bubble, “Oh my god— don’t say—”

“Explore,” She cackles again, emphasising the word, “You two looked just about ready to pounce on each other—” She grins, mischievous eyes shining at you reddening steadily.

“If you don’t stop right now,” You stutter out, trying to keep a stern face, “I swear, Kim Jangmi, I will not utter a word about Kim Taehyung.”

Jangmi sighs, rolling her eyes, “Such a spoilsport,” She clicks her tongue in disappointment.

“My brother’s spoilsport germs are contaminating you,” She continues in a solemn tone, mimicking a doctor who’s about to deliver some life-changing news, “You’ll probably only get worse as you hang around him more.” She nods to herself gravely, “I’m so sorry, Ms. Baek, I’m so sorry that we couldn’t save your fun—”

“So Dr.Kim, do you want to know about Tae or not?” You press, willing your burning cheeks to calm down.

You couldn’t just go around blushing everytime Namjoon is mentioned. You were a grown woman for heaven’s sake, not a teenager having her first crush. She clicked her tongue, muttering a spoilsport under her breath and looking at you, “Was he there?”

“Of course, he was!” You assure her happily, “Everybody was there to witness my doom.”

“Director Baek!” Juyeon comes running through the door of your office, looking frazzled, “Someone’s here for you!”

You look up from your laptop, surprised at your usually calm secretary looking so out of it.

“Do they have an appointment?” You ask, eyes back on the digital screen. “Isn’t that the norm you insist upon?”

Juyeon has been your aide since the time you joined Jeon Corps. Over the years, she insisted that you have visitors and clients make an appointment with you instead of dropping by and that rule applied to everyone except Jungkook, who just charmed his way regardless.

“It’s him!” She exclaims, “Your fiancé! He’s here to see you!”

“Namjoon?” Your eyes are wide as you ask her and she nods in affirmation. “Why is he here?”

“I-I don’t know,” She breathes heavily. You wonder if she just caught a look at him and ran up to tell you. “—but he looks so angry and—”

“He always looks angry,” You tell her, a small smile gracing your lips. “That’s his resting face.”

“He’s coming here!”

“So? Why are you so scared?” You say, almost nonchalantly.

“Isn’t Bangtan scary in general?” She says unsurely, “—and he’s the next Don, so he’s definitely scarier.”

“I get that he looks scary but you don’t have to be scared, Juyeon.” You try to calm her down, “He won’t do anything—”

The door to your office is flung open and Namjoon saunters in, not even bothering with a knock.

If you weren’t caught off guard by his actions, you were by his look for the day.He was wearing a black shirt with rolled sleeves letting you admire his large, veiny arms and hands. His black trousers showed off his strong thighs and long legs with shiny shoes and his hair was pushed back.

“Why are you here?” You ask, not bothering to get up from your chair and give pleasantries.He smiles at you, turns to Juyeon and tilts his head to the door.

“Leave.” The poor woman scampers out of his sight, not listening to you as you try to stop her. “Also, cancel all her appointments for the day.”

Juyeon mutters out a little yes and leaves the room, closing the door behind her.

“Why are you cancelling my appointments, RM?” You ask him, not bothering to hide your annoyance, “Why are you even here? Do you not have a syndicate to run?”

“I think I’m deserving of a day off,” His dimples make an appearance rather rudely, and you feel your annoyance wane away. “—so are you,”

“I’m quitting this job for you—,” You begin to complain.

The fact that you have to quit your work still hasn’t quite settled itself in you, so you are rightfully a little bummed and clingy about using all your work time, doing just that —work.

“—so what’s a day off, right?” You think to yourself.

What’s a day-off when you’re writing away your whole life to him, right?

“So, what’s the plan?” You ask as you slip on your seatbelt.

You were in Namjoon’s expensive sports car, waiting to know why he had so unceremoniously asked to take you out —a date, your hopeless brain offered, but you pushed it away.

“I have a few things to do,” He starts his car, pulling into the driveway. “I wanted you to help me with it.”

“Help you?” You ask, tilting your head in confusion. “I can handle a gun, but I don’t think I can match up to the skills of RM from Bangtan,” You reply honestly.

You were trained in handling guns, but it had been a while and you were almost sure you were rusty.

“You won’t need a gun for this,” He smiles, sparing you an amused glance. “We are going to meet noona. You are friends with her, right?”

There is only one woman in this whole world that Namjoon has ever called Noona and that’s Saera.

“Saera unnie?” You tilt your head, “Why?”

“Have a cake tasting for our wedding cake.” He tells you, then takes a moment to continue, “—and to invite her for the wedding,”

Once that was added, you knew why you were being taken as an accompaniment, an accessory —Saera would consider attending if you asked her to. You feel your stomach sinking.

The disappointment settled in, only because you were expecting and hoping desperately that he wanted to spend time with you, like a couple would want to. But, you try not to let your disappointment show, instead talk about the issue in hand.

“Unnie never attends anything related to Bangtan,” you say, “you know that.”

Saera never attended any Bangtan events, the most she did so far was agreeing to make your wedding cake, and that was because you had pestered her day in and night about her cakes being the best in the world and how it’d be a waste to not have it on your special day —with loads of puppy eyes, childish tantrums, a little bit of fake tears and emotional blackmailing.

“The Don and Madam think that if you ask,” He says, looking at you and parking his car into the café parking lot. “—she might agree.”

Moon’s Epiphany was a little away across your office, a beautiful café known for their great coffee with nice and aromatic blends, trendy, seasonal drinks, it’s mouth-wateringly delicious, artistically beautiful pastries and other dishes; truly a food-blogger’s wet dream.

“So bringing me out in the guise of a date was just to get Saera unnie’s attention?” You say nonchalantly, nodding to yourself as you take off your seatbelt.

“This can be our date.” Namjoon says understanding your underlying meaning, but you don’t listen, just getting out of his car and walking into the café.

Namjoon sighs to himself, knowing very well he wasn’t doing a splendid job treating you well like he had said a few days ago but this had to be solved —he needed Saera and Hwan home and you were the only one capable of doing it.

“Ah, look!” Saera’s sweet, welcoming voice called as you stepped inside the café, “It’s Madam Lily!”

She giggles when she sees your annoyed expression, something she often told reminded her of Hwan.

“Not you too, unnie —” You whine childishly, “I’m not the Madam,”

“Yet.” She adds, moving to cage you in a hug, “Yet, Na. You’ll be the Madam soon enough!” She whispers to you, “—with how excited everyone seems to be about you marrying Namu.”

She lets go of you, as you pull back your arms, “Where’s Hwan?”

“Kindergarten,” She answers, “He’s a big boy now, you know.” She mimics her son’s tone, shaking her head at the five-year old, “Your usual?” She asks, as she takes to your favourite spot in the place, by the large windows streaming in the sunlight.

“Yeah, and—” You stop, stifling awkwardness settling in, you gesture to your fiancé stepping in after you. “—something for Namjoon too.”

Saera’s face falls slightly as she turns around, feeling a presence behind. You turn with her, facing Namjoon who looks unsure and awkward.

“Hello, noona.” He said, trying to smile but not really managing much. Saera stared at him, lost in her thoughts before she cleared her throat. “It’s nice to see you,”

“RM,” She nods, gulping and sighing, “It’s nice to see you too.”

“You look well,” He says, a soft smile adorning his face, making him somehow look childlike and innocent.

“You-you look well too.” Saera smiles awkwardly, “I-I’ll get your order,” She stutters and leaves the two of you in a pile of discomfort.

You look between the leaving woman and at Namjoon who looks a little let down, sighing to himself.

“Let’s sit down, yeah?” You say, trying to chip at the awkwardness settling in the place. Namjoon wordlessly nods, sitting across you.

The café was not as busy because the lunch rush hadn’t quite started yet and you are thankful for the cosy quiet the place offers you in that moment.

You want to ask what was happening, what happened with the two and why the two seemed so hesitant with each other. You knew that they used to be very close as kids, Jangmi even joked that Namjoon and Jungkook were basically Saera’s kids who followed her around like ducklings.

Jungkook seemed to have somehow retained the relationship he had with her, after everything that happened but Namjoon obviously didn’t.

Your curiosity piques as you watch Namjoon still fiddling with his fingers —looking nothing like the scary mobster that he is but more like a young man who has a lot of burden to carry on his shoulders and thoughts to carry in his mind, but before you could ask anything, your coffee arrived.

“Here’s your coffee,” Saera brings over your drinks, sliding your steaming cup of black coffee to you and an extra-sweet, iced latte for Namjoon.

You smile in thanks at the woman, who all but runs back into the kitchen to bring out the food. You take a sip of your bitter coffee, humming to yourself. You watch Namjoon as he takes a sip of his drink, the cream leaving a moustache over his lips, which his thick tongue licks clean.

Before any sinful thoughts could cloud you, Saera is back with your food —skillet steak, eggs and potatoes for you, nutella stuffed french toast with lots of toppings and katsu sandwiches, both house specialties for Namjoon.

She clearly has favourites.

You muse, watching as she mutters to Namjoon, very much like a mother, “Eat the sandwiches first, then the dessert.”

You vaguely remember your talk with him at the balcony —something about him liking sweet things.

The terrifying gangster is a sweet tooth, how cute.

Namjoon nods obediently, whispering his thanks and you turn to Saera, “Unnie, join us.”

It was time to get to work, and Namjoon seems to think the same because he speaks next.

“Yeah, noona, join us,” Namjoon looks up to the woman, adding in a pleading tone. “Please.”

Saera looks at the two of you, sporting puppy-like looks and gives up, agreeing to join you with coffee for herself.

“So, what brings you two here?” She sat next to you, taking a sip of her iced americano.

“We are here to invite you—” You start, jumping right into it.

“No, never.” Saera slammed her cup back onto the table, shaking her head firmly. “Not happening!”

“What do you mean by no?” You pout, unleashing your whiny abilities. “Please unnie, please.”

“If you had come any late,” You say calmly to Jangmi as you drive her to your home right after she landed in Seoul, “I would’ve considered sending a hitman out for you.”

“Missed me that much, babygurl?” She flutters her eyes at you theatrically and you shove her away.

“Don’t you ever call me that, Rosie!” You shudder, equally as dramatic, “That’s disgusting! Who even calls another human being that?!”

“Many men do,” Jangmi laughs, telling you in an assuring tone, “I bet half of Bangtan males do that too.”

“What?” You scoff, “Call each other babygurl?”

“Imagine that—” She giggles, making you laugh at the imagery too, “Jihoon or anyone actually calling oppa or any of the Elites, babyboy—” She drops her voice comically low, trying to imitate the man’s voice.

“Baby boy Namjoon-ie,” She continues, trying to sound seductive but somehow making you feel disgusted. You shudder slightly, your skin erupting with goosebumps.

“They will have him skinned, Rose,” You shake your head, laughing in between your words. “And throw him into an acid bath, if they are feeling particularly creative.”

“I wish I could do that,” She sighs, “—and not feel bad about it afterwards.”

“Is he still pestering you?” You look over at her, slightly alarmed and taken aback.

Jihoon is Jihyo’s twin brother, a man who was equally as ambitious as his sister and his eyes on the only Kim daughter. If Jihyo competed for Namjoon, Jihoon was after Jangmi.

It started when Jangmi developed a sort of friendship with him in high school and with Jangmi’s friendly nature, the man had assumed that she liked him and they could get married.

You still weren’t sure if the desire was for Jangmi or the position as the Don’s son-in-law.

Jihoon had asked her out multiple times over the years, telling her his plans to elope and all but Jangmi rejected each of his approaches but truly never cut him off because they were pretty good friends and she didn’t want to drift away from the few friends she had.

When the Don found out that Jangmi was in love with Taehyung, she was engaged to him right after university. Jihoon seemed to have taken the engagement as a challenge and continued to harass Jangmi about accepting his feelings and leaving behind Bangtan and Taehyung.

If your general dislike for the Shin Jihyo wasn’t already much, Jihoon’s harassing moves only made you hate them more.

“Did you really expect him to quietly take my six-hundred and fifty-first no and not see my face afterwards?” She asks you, looking at you in disbelief.

“It’s about time he accepts that you don’t like him back,” You tell her, rolling your eyes, “This isn’t even about you being engaged to another man, it’s about you saying him no —multiple times, over many years!”

“I know and I wish he’d stop—”

“Block him, threaten him, tell his family, tell the Don, the Madam, your brother or even Taehyung—” You stop yourself, eyes wide in realisation, “Yes, tell Taehyung! He will fix this mess for you!”

“There isn’t a mess, Lily,” She shakes her head, denying, “Jihoon’s just a little dumb and—”

“Disrespectful? Indecent? Deaf? Isn't getting that consent is very much a thing? Can’t read obvious signs? Can’t understand no?” You offer, sounding curious.

She shoots you a look and sighs, muttering a quiet, “All of that, yeah.”

You roll your eyes, lips lifting up a little even with the obvious worry the situation was causing.

“I am being serious though,” You tell her, “Jihoon needs to stop bothering you. If anything goes wrong, he’ll end up losing his head.”

Jangmi nods, deep in thought.

“Forget about him,” She shakes her head, “You tell me,” She turns to you with her mischievous eyes, “What do you have for me?”

“What should I be having for you?” You play dumb, hoping it convinces her.

“Details about the engagement and your fiancé, of course!” She looks at you, like it’s the most obvious thing in the world, which it was but you didn’t want to think much about Namjoon and your engagement when in a few days everything of yours will become his.

“He’s your brother!” You try again.

“I can happily ignore that detail,” She waves your concern off.

“We haven’t really spoken—”

“Since the engagement?” She gasps, “Are you kidding me?!”

“No-No,” You say, trying to correct her misunderstanding, “After he took me—”

“He took you on a date?!” Jangmi jumps straight to her dream conclusion, “Elites can take their fiancées on dates?”

“It wasn't—” You roll your eyes, the disappointment from the days before resurfacing due to her words.

“Where did he take you?” She presses on, eyes bright with excitement.

“Moon’s Epiphany—” You answer, praying that this will stop her from throwing more questions at you, but she continues.

“Saera unnie’s café?” Her eyes are wide, “Is this man—? Did she see you? Did he see her? Did he talk to her? Did she talk to him? Did you stay there long? What happened? Come on, Lily, tell me! I need to know!”

“Will you let me speak!?”

With Jangmi the remaining days till your wedding was much easier as the two of you caught up with everything happening in your lives, shopped till you could fill another closet, had your beauty and spa appointments and really enjoyed everything your leisure and wealth could provide you with.

Your wedding was going to be held at the city’s Paradise Resort, on the banks of Han River. So, on the day before, almost all of Bangtan was at the resort, enjoying themselves with alcohol and all the amenities the resort provided.

Your mother was at the bar, eating and drinking away with her friends while your Dad was with the Don and the others talking, laughing with lots of alcohol. Madam Kim was busy getting the details of your wedding done with Jangmi and you were all alone, non-alcoholic sangria in your hands as you lounge around under a gazebo.

Occasionally, people or families who are away due to Bangtan's work outside of Seoul come to you and chat about everything, teasing you about what's to come tomorrow and to enjoy yourself, even if it hurts.

You laughed, blushed and indulged everyone in their fantasy of a shy, new bride till the sunset and everyone seemed to be gathering for dinner.

You wanted to join them, but you just didn't feel great. You were feeling anxious, borderline dizzy with worrying thoughts about tomorrow. You had already thought of running away; at least fifteen times over the day and really considered the pros and cons of that move.

What would happen if you ran away?

Would your father and mother be executed?

Would the Don kill his best friend?

Would your father live with this act of ultimate betrayal? Will your father forgive you?

Would you mother be happy that you lost a chance at a wonderful life or sad that you missed such a grand life?

Will Madam Kim still consider you her daughter?

What would Namjoon think? Will the storm find you? Will he just let you go? Will he get angry? Will he feel betrayed? Will he hate you?

Would he hate himself?

Your mind was heavy as you excused yourself from the gathering —you wanted to get some rest before tomorrow.

"Yeah, get some rest sweetie," Madam Kim smiled at you, eyes crinkling with warmth. "It'll be very busy and draining for you tomorrow."

You nod, bid them a good night and leave to find your parents.

Your father was with your mother, entertaining some of their other friends who at the sight of you, congratulated and gushed over you and your marriage with Namjoon.

No one asked where he was though because everyone knew he wasn't at the resort.

He hadn't even turned up.

You sigh disappointed in your soon-to-be husband. He could have just showed up and stayed by you but no, he has to disappear when things are hard for you.

"I'll be in my room, Appa." You tell your dad, giving him a hug and pulling him away from the crowd. "Namjoon isn't gonna come, is he?"

"Our work isn't exactly cut out for corporate business hours, honey," He reminds you in his soft tone, cupping your cheeks in a fatherly manner, "—you know that,"

"I know, Appa—" You sigh, "But-but, it's our wedding tomorrow! Why isn't he here? Shouldn't he at least call me? I am here all alone—"

"So?" Your mother asks you, looking incredulous, "What if you are getting married tomorrow? You could be dying in labour giving birth to his child and still can't expect him to be here with you! He's a busy man with much more important priorities. Why should he even—"

"Sook," You dad stops her in a warning tone, because he can sense an argument brewing between you two. "My daughter wasn't talking to you and I haven't asked for your opinions. Stay out of this." He hisses, voice low and eyes narrowed in warning.

"Well, tell your daughter to lower her expectations of an influential man like Namjoon," She huffs out a laugh, "Wants him tied to her skirt!" She huffs again, "Tell her to wake up early tomorrow! Tell her it's time she takes responsibility for herself! I can't do everything—"

"You do everything?" You scoff, anger and disappointment at your soon-to-be husband channelling himself to your mother, "What did you ever do for me?! It was always Appa! It's time I take responsibility?! I have always been responsible! It's you, who has to learn responsibility! It's your daughter's wedding and what are you doing? Getting drunk? Hitting on young waiters—"

Your nose flared, eyes narrowing in hatred and anger, you looked right about ready to choke your mother but your father held you down, whispering, "Calm down, sweets, the lady is looking for you,"

"Miss Baek," The Manager of the resort had walked up to you, "Mister Kim has a message for you."

"Namjoon?" Your heart stuttered a little, "What is it?"

"He said it would be good for you to return to your room now," She told you, eyes racing over your face to calculate your reaction.

"I was just about to leave. He didn't have to waste your time, I know you are very busy." You tell her, trying to be nice, "If he checks up on this again, tell him I am back in my room."

"Yes, Miss Baek," the lady gave you a bright smile, "Do you want me to escort you to your room?"

"No need, I can get there on my own," You reassure her, "I have to finish this conversation with my parents and find my friend, so please, you can just get on with your work."

The manager bowed at you and left, while you turned to your parents.

"See?" Your mother starts again, "He wants you to stop being a whiny, clingy disgrace and go hide in your room, away from his family and friends."

"He wants me to get enough rest because he knows I'll need it! because you will be busy being the worst mother ever." You snap and before you could add more, your father gets in between the two of you.

"He wants you to get enough rest," your father tries to refocus your attention on Namjoon's gesture, "That's sweet of him. Isn't it, sweetcheeks?"

"Not according to your wife, Appa," You point out mockingly, "She thinks it's him telling me to stop being a disgrace,"

"No, it's not. You are not a disgrace." He tells you, holding your shoulders, "—he wants you well-rested for tomorrow! He understands that it can get hard for you if you don't have enough sleep. You know it'll be a long day tomorrow."

"Yeah yeah," you roll your eyes, never really being that good at staying angry at your father. "I'll go find Jangmi and leave. I'm tired."

"Of course, sweetie." Your dad gives you a hug, pressing a kiss to your crown and patting your cheek with love, "I saw Jangmi at the bar."

You nod, "Good night,"

"Sleep well, dear." You give him one last hug and leave after passing a harsh glare at your mother.

When you find Jangmi, she's at the bar downing shots with her cousins. Against her wanting to stay and drink more, you pull her away from the drunk crowd and to your room.

"Why are we leaving early?" She asks, alcohol already tingling her voice. "Shouldn't you be out there, with me, drinking your heart out to celebrate the last day of your fabulous bachelorette life?"

"Your brother doesn't think so," You tell her, tone a little bitter, "He thinks I should get rest because tomorrow will be long and hard for me,"

Jangmi makes a face, "Ew."

You laugh, "Yeah, I forgot that you were perversely drunk."

"—and he's a bore sober!" She counters, "He's going to wrong all your fun out of you!"

"I don't care, Rose," You sigh, rubbing your temples, "I just want to relax for now. I'm already doomed, might as well get ruined having indulged in good sleep and self care."

"Did you drink at all today?" She asks, throwing an arm around your neck.

"Water?" You muse at her, "Lots! It's supposed to solve all my problems! Jihyo's mother told me,"

"To drink water?" Jangmi looks confused.

"Yes, it'll apparently get rid of my dark circles, acne, dull skin, stomach issues, anxiety and uncaring fiancé." You exaggerate, making Jangmi giggle. "Honestly, I think she's right! Half my problems will be solved if I just drowned people!" You gasp in a dramatic way, "Maybe she is right! Water does solve everything!"

"Wait, wait, wait!" Jangmi stops laughing, "Why are you even taking advice from the Shins?"

"I didn't ask for it!" You say, whining. "The woman has been following me around everywhere dropping her unsolicited advice at me, at every turn and corner!"

"Okay, okay! Calm down now!" Jangmi tries to coddle you, "We should just get some rest, you'll feel better,"

"Yeah, I think we should just sleep," You agree, keying into your room.

Your room was a little secluded, away from the general hustle-bustle of the resort, as to give you some well-deserved privacy and peace. You had your own pool, jacuzzi and an amazing view into the starry sky and river.

When you swing open your door, pouty and disgruntled, the scent of the to is the first thing you notice. The calming, clean lavender relaxes you, as your face contorts in confusion.

Did someone come by to fix your room?

You step in further and notice the lights are different —more dimmed and yellow.

You step in further to notice your room is fixed up —not too much, but with fresh flowers, candles and on your bed was a big box and a large wooden tray with a wine bottle —your favourite, a jammy, rich red blend, some healthy snacks and chocolates.

"What are these?" You breathe, pulse racing in anticipation.

Curious and excited, you jump on your professionally made bed, pulling away at the box's ribbons. The box opened to reveal white roses neatly arranged into a heart, with a note.

Maybe a bath and your favourite wine will help you sleep better. - Kim Namjoon.

Your eyes are wide in shock, pulse still racing as you try to think and react.

How does he know you like wines? How does he know your favourites? How does he know you take a bath to relax? How did he know you'll have trouble sleeping? How did he manage to arrange this? And why did he go out of his way to do this? Was this him trying to treat you better? Like a wife?

You stay quiet, meeting eyes with Jangmi who is looking at you gaging your reaction.

"Did oppa send this?" She looks equally speechless. You nod wordlessly, rushing to the bathroom wondering if he had done something there too.The bathroom was decorated too, with flower petals and candles —with a variety of bath bombs, salts and other things.

"Did my brother do all this?" Jangmi's eyes are wide with excitement, "What did you do to him? When did he become like this?"

You shrug because you don't know, and because you are still stunned.

"Since when does he have a cheesy bone in him?"

You giggle, a blush covering your cheeks —maybe he only has a romantic bone for you. It made you happy to know that you are the first and only recipient of his affection and romantic gifts.

Jangmi opened the wine, pouring them into glasses as you set the rose box bouquet on the coffee table.

Should you get the flowers preserved? For safe-keeping? For memories? Will a picture just suffice?

As you busied yourself with your daydreams and questions, your anger slowly melted away. You were touched, honestly and very happy.

Maybe Namjoon wasn't so bad.

—next chapter • chapter five

—author’s endnote • the next part of the series—the moonflower of bangtan (starring jin)—branches off from this point in the timeline, so i wanted to ask how you guys would prefer i go about it! would you rather i: finish one story completely, then move on to the next, or update both stories at the same time, a few days apart? the stories aren’t as tightly connected, but all of them do overlap timeline-wise. i don’t want things to get confusing, irritating, or accidentally spoiler-y toward the end. i haven’t started writing the next story just yet, but i do have the hyung-line planned out and ready if i decide to write them simultaneously. let me know what you think!! i’d really love your input on this. hope you’re doing well—take care, and lots of love, aksh 💕

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2021, December 17.