#rogues headcanons

[luckywritesstuff]

I had a wild dream last night, so here's if Batman Villains were (specifically middle school) teachers.

The only reason I'm making this middle school is cause in my dream, it was my exact middle school for some reason (haven't even been there for years 🤷‍♂️) but it was really funny. Plus, less stuff I have to worry about like extracurriculars.

Mr. Crane is DEFINITELY a Chemistry teacher. Like, he's teaching these kids that mixing ammonia and bleach makes mustard gas (he lost a student after that lesson). But he's also a complete grouch. No one has ever seen him smile, yet he's everyone's favorite teacher. Like, he notices everything. One of his better students comes in with a black eyes and some bruises? He's not even seeing the kid after class, he's about to knock the shit out of one of his next bell students for putting a hand on them. All his students won't stop digging into his personal life, though. Like, one time, the student were asking if he was single, and he sarcastically siad "ask the math teacher." So the entire school started shipping them together, which really pissed Jonathan off (he honestly couldn't do shit, he set himself up for that). And if one kid's like "a man dating a man is wrong!" Then Jonathan is going off on their ass with all his religious trauma, telling them that homosexuality is NOT a sin and that's just their parents being bigots (it does not help his case when asked if he's gay). Also, at the end of the school year, he stops caring and lets his students do whatever as long as they're quiet. And if they refuse to shut up? He's putting on Bill Nye and making them write about what they're watching. And last day of school? The most physical affection he's seen in his life. Like, all these kids are sad they won't have him again and giving him hugs, and he doesn’t understand why. But you know what? One of them gave him some fancy coffee (cause hes never not drinking it), so maybe it wasn't so bad after all.

Mr. Nygma Sir (Arkham knight reference) is a math teacher. Now, typically I'd say he'd go for Biology because its all about living organisms, but its not about anatomy in specific. He was a forensics scientist after all, he loves teaching about the body and how to use wounds as clues to the cause of death (but he is the host for the forensics team and they have been winner for 8 straight years in a row). But with Math? This man can teach it all. Its about definite numbers (or at least thats in the math he's teaching) so of course hes the best at it. Its simple. Plus, he can hand out those worksheets that the answers make up a riddle and the person who solves it correctly first gets a prize. Also, he picks favorites. He doesn’t like the suck ups because, sure they're smart, but they always want something out of being smart. It pisses him off (he's very hypocritical). But the autistic kid with maybe one friend that finishes they're assignment before he's even done teaching the lesson? Thats his favorite student. He could care less if the other students fail or pass his class. On top of that, he has fought students before over what color each subject is (he kicked out a kid because they said math was green, it's obviously red). He also hosts the puzzle club, where the students literally just do jigsaw puzzles with him, music in the background, and fun conversations emerge. He calls his students quiz kids (Gotham riddler reference). A lot of people don't like him that much as a person, but they definitely respect him as a teacher. Especially with how engaging his class is.

Mr. Dent (He's pretty chill, typically he lets his students call him Mr. Harvey) is the History teacher for sure. He likes that everything in history happened by chance, that things typically have to happen twice, that there are always two sides of the story (the winners and the losers) and he loves the court cases. He will go on for hours about Brown v. Board of Education. Most definitely is the host for the debate club (and encourages bullying the Forensics kids.) He has this weird collection of coins from different places and time periods as well, he's really proud of it. His class is either really engaging, or really boring, and there will never be a sign on which it's gonna be. One day, he'd go into great detail on what exactly caused the great depression. Just the cause. Other days, he will literally say "Stalin is communist." And leave it at that. If asked what a communist even is, he'll just grumble something about looking it up yourself. Mattering on the day, asking about his scar could be the funniest or most horrifying thing. On a bad day? No one talk to him or else he will lash out. But on a good day? He never gives the same story 3 times. Two of his classes will think he got the scar from a freak car accident, while his other bell thinks he got the scar from a childhood mess up with a clumsy Harvey and a campfire. Then, he starts mixing it up. Its confusing. Despite all of that, students typically pass his class cause its easy to get extra credit. He just lets you flip a coin. Heads? Extra credit. Tails? No extra credit. Its a perfect system. Along with that, when presenting projects, be prepared, he does those little wheel spinners so its a fair chance for everyone. And he does a LOT of projects. But with his whole moody personality, the students tend to call him "Mr. Two Face" behind his back. They think he doesnt hear. And he pretends it doesn't hurt a little.

I just wanted to throw these out. Should I do more? If so, who? Like, was this fun??? Cause I thought it was pretty fun to write. I also just wanted to get it out of my drafts lol

[curious-menace]

The rogues: 15 their biggest pet peeve headcanon, please?

gotham rouges Biggest pet peeve?

penguin

penguin hates tardy people. he runs a tight ship around here...well no he doesnt. the final offer has more holes in it than a swiss chees factory but still! he cant be having people showing up whenever they damn well please! Hes got a business to run, if his drivers show up 5 minutes late then it has a knock on effect to the rest of his schedule and that could cost him money. and if you cost penguin money he’s going to cost you some body parts. 

harvey/twoface

harvey hates people who go to hard on handshakes. He had to shake a lot of hands during his campaign for DA . he hated how some people, particularly the old men whose positions he would be taking , tried to crush his hand as a way to assert dominance. he has to write with that hand! just get the photo op over with and stop trying to break his bones. he’s not about to complain about people with limp hand shakes, he’s very gentle himself usually but hand crushers tick him off.

Twoface hates left hand drive cars. when he’s running the show, he finds it hard to change gears in an automatic because that's harvey’s side of the body. in the heat of the moment he just cant wrap his head around it. He mostly leaves the driving to harvey since they can both agree arguing over who's driving this time isnt worth getting caught. He’s got a few right hand drive cars just for him sitting in their hideouts but he rarely gets to use them. 

ivy

people who throw their trash on the ground when there's a bin right beside them. its not just the littering that bothers her, its the entitlement, the laziness the whole “oh someone else will take care of it “ mind set that really her goat. she’s gotten arrested before because she stopped mid chase to throw someones garbage back into the window of their car when they just tipped it into the street. they tried it again and she did something with her vines that the perpetrator refuses to speak about. she could be heard shouting “it was worth it” while the poor sap was being taken to the nearest proctologist. 

scarecrow

Coffee snobs and people who complain at baristas. just fuck off outta his sight and clear the starbucks line. he doesn't have time to listen to anyone complain to the poor college student behind the till that their venti iced mocha frappe with caramel drizzle and 4 pumps of syrup is too sugary. and he REALLY doesn't want a lecture on why arabica beans are superior to robusto from someone with more neckbeard than common sense. just give him his coffee and get out of his road, he’s got work to do. he just wants a strong black coffee with 2 sugars, thats it. oddly enough, the baristas love him because hes no fuss and he tips well. and maybe because he’s gassed a few rude customers but they pretend like that doesnt happen if the cops ask. 

Riddler

He cant stand folks with a lack of manners. i dont mean mean people, the rogues arent the nicest bunch around lets be real. what i mean is people who let the door close in peoples faces, people who disrespect others homes, critique their appearance or choices . he might let things like the occasional display of bad table manners slide, not everyone was socialised like him. but flat out rudeness? forgetting your pleases and thank yous? it REALLY grinds his gears. manners cost absolutely nothing but they really affect how other people view you.

Harley 

people who think mental illnesses are made up or that people with mental illnesses are faking it for attention. i dont think that needs much explanation. she was a psychiatrist for long enough and a good one at that. having family members of her patients stand in the way of their treatment, undermine or belittle their attempts to get better or seek help made Dr Quinzel see red. But  as harely? she doesnt get mad, she gets her hammer. 

i am all of these guys lol. well except twoface. i cant drive and i dont wana hah. 

Got something you Wana talk about? Send me an ask or a DM! 💜💙💛🧡💚❤️

[luckywritesstuff]

Rogues Gallery Music HCs (Pt. 1)

A/n: I fear that I listen to too much music not to find the perfect songs and music artists, so please enjoy, and if you have any more ideas send em over cause I'll need ideas for my next part 😭🙇‍♂️💫

Scarecrow - Will Wood

You can't tell me this doesn't just fit his vibe. It's so loud and chaotic, yet it has such deeper meaning. This is just very Jonathan Crane (especially in his head psychiatrist days.)

Chemical Overreaction/ Compound Fracture

"I might be a saint worth steeples

I might be the brain of evil

Bad things happen to good people

Good things happen to me :]"

2econd 2ight 2eer (that was fun, goodbye.)

"Now with my moral compass pointing south, going down

With no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no respect for reality

I'm just a psycho, babe. Come and go out my mind

I didn't lose it babe, there wasn't much to find"

Against the Kitchen Floor

"So, I could hold your hand, but keep you at arm's length

Or hang me from a branch too high to climb and shake

Less rare than scarce, less diamond than rough

Unlikely to be more than just the coal you fail to crush"

Riddler - I DON'T KNOW HOW BUT THEY FOUND ME

Okay, you need to hear me out here. These songs? Top of the world, smarts and beauty, perfection. It has that evil genius vibe that Ed deserves, and the beat? Chef's kiss.

Do It All the Time

"We're taking over the world

A little victim-less crime

And when I'm taking your innocence

I'll be corrupting your mind"

Choke

"Now shut your dirty mouth

If I could burn this town

I wouldn't hesitate

To smile while you suffocate and die"

Mad IQs

"Oh, you will never, ever stop me

'Cause I'm never gonna quit

Gonna get just what I want

And I am gonna get it quick

Lose yourself inside the city

Lose your mind inside a week

You can lose all of your money

You can find enough to sleep"

Poison Ivy & Harley Quinn - Chappell Roan

It's the red haired lesbian energy for me- Jokes aside, I just love this for them. These songs bleed "we hooked up a few times and now we're getting married" energy and I am LIVING for it.

Giver

"’Cause you ain’t got to tell me

It’s just in my nature

So take it like a taker

’Cause, baby, I’m a giver

Ain’t no need to hurry

’Cause, baby, I deliver"

HOT TO GO!

"Well, I woke up alone staring at my ceiling

I try not to care but it hurts my feelings

You don't have to stare, come here, get with it

No one's touched me there in a damn hot minute"

Red Wine Supernova

"I'm in the hallway waitin' for ya

Mini skirt and my go-go boots

I just want you to make a move

So slow down, sit down, it's new

I just wanna get to know ya

Guess I didn't quite think it through (Nah-uh, girl)

Fell in love with the thought of you

Now I'm choked up, face down, burnt out

Baby, why don't you come over?

Red Wine Supernova

Falling into me"

Catwoman - MARINA

Marina herself is a queen, only fitting for a goddess like Selina. The music, the feeling, the power in her words, all of it screams Cat in the best way possible.

How to Be a Heartbreaker

"Girls, we do whatever it will take

'Cause girls don't want, we don't want our hearts to break

In two, so it's better to be fake

Can't risk losin' in love again, babe

This is how to be a heartbreaker

Boys they like a little danger

We'll get 'em fallin' for a stranger, a player

Singin', "I lo-lo-love you""

Oh No!

"Don't do love, don't do friends

I'm only after success

Don't need a relationship

I'll never soften my grip

Don't want cash, don't want card

Want it fast, want it hard

Don't need money, don't need fame

I just want to make a change"

Primadonna

"Primadonna girl, yeah

All I ever wanted was the world

I can't help that I need it all

The primadonna life, the rise and fall

You say that I'm kinda difficult

But it's always someone else's fault

Got you wrapped around my finger, babe

You can count on me to misbehave

Primadonna girl

Would you do anything for me?

Buy a big diamond ring for me?

Would you get down on your knees for me?

Pop that pretty question, right now baby"

And an extra cause I was feeling silly :3

Two Face - Double Life by Pharrell Williams

"You'll never know when it's your time to go

And where you end up in life, that's code

You can't ignore, you're spinning your life

Your watch is broken 'cause you spent all your time

It's now or never, on this, everything rides

Before the spinning stops, you must pick a side"

[curious-menace]

Rogues scent Headcanons

so ive been doing a lot of asks lately i thought maybe id take 20 mins and do some of my own headcanon stuff.

too bad 20 minutes turned into several weeks haha.

Penguin

my first instinct says something expensive like aftershave or soap but given his appearance in arkham knight im going to say he smells more like money, gun oil and maybe damp. he seems to be outside in the rain a lot and spend a lot of time near bodies of water so maybe also kind of ocean-y? not like ocean breeze purfume more like salt water and seaweed. 

Harvey

its a blend of cigar smoke , whiskey and antiseptic. it depends on the time of day which one is stronger. The brand of cigar and whiskey also depends on who’s running things at the moment. Harvey preferes havana made parejo style cigars and Scotch whisky where as Twoface preferes presidente shaped dominican cigars and japanese whiskey. Neither of them like the antiseptic smell but better lightly on his skin than all around him if he winds up in hospital with an infection because he wouldnt keep his wounds clean. 

Ivy

Chlorophyll is the strongest smell on her but also pechrictor ( the smell on grass after it rains) as well as just good old dirt. if its summer she sometimes smells  like blooming flowers, babys breath, roses and the like. ivy doesnt really sweat persay but she does get dewy if shes running around a lot.  this scent is more like decomposing leaves, the kind of smell you get from leaf piles in autumn.  if she gets cut or wounded the injury smells like fresh cut grass. 

Riddler

riddler always smells like fresh cotton, talc or sometimes minty toothpaste or breath mints. he doesnt like typical body smells and tries his best to mask them. bo is pretty offencive to him, maybe its because he has a such a good sense of smell. he likes light smells that dont over power you  or hit you in the face. if he’s in a manic phase and maybe forgets to wash he’ll smell a lot of fancy aftershave 

Scarecrow

Scarecrow always smells of natural smells. not TOO disimilar from ivy but leaning more towards food and cooking smells than plant smells. fresh jon smells like cinnamon, cardamon allspice and anise star. he smells like fresh baked goods which annoys the other rogues to no end because he always makes them hungry. even after a day in the lab his scent is akin to espresso, bitter and earthy. In his costume he sometimes smells like a leaky barn, damp straw or spoiled silage. He tries not to take the smell of fear toxin home with him ( since if he got used to the smell, he might not notice it in the air incase of a leak) but when it clings to him it has a hidious sweet smell that is distinctly artificial and chemical. the only way i can describe it is rotten pork if the smell was made in a perfume lab and not from an actual dead thing.

Harley

as with the others, harleys smell changes depending on what shes doing. her natural scent is of strawberry no tears shampoo, maybe a little floral from hanging with ivy. when she’s in full costume she reeks of greasepaint, like a circus dressing room on a hot day. actually she smells very painty in general; spray paint from her joker graffiti, housepaint from decorating whatever hideout shes in, nail polish from decorating herself maybe even some acrylic if shes been finger painting.  

hey hope you guys enjoyed this. it was just a silly thought i had thats been sitting in my drafts for like 5 weeks and i thought id better get it out before i forget about it XD

got anything you’d like to add? something you’d like to ask? send me an ask or a dm!💜💙💛💚🧡❤️

[curious-menace]

How would the Gotham Rogues react on meeting a super cute hero s/o?

Rogues x cute super hero s/o

penguin

it kinda depends on how you meet.  if you just kinda bump into one another, i think is first instinct, as with most things, is to flirt. he loves cute people and loves seeing people blush. he doesn't feel like he’s in danger since you are so cute and all. he’ll probably underestimate you and if you want, you can use that to your advantage to beat him. or you can flirt back.

thats also an option. 

Harvey

again, it depends on how you meet or what you're doing when he first sets eyes on you. if youre his type harvey might get a little flustered. he might stammer a little and hesitate before calling his goons because he wants to look at you for a few more seconds before everything goes to shit. twoface is similar but more in a “oh gee i hope this doesnt awaken anything in me” kinda way.

spoiler alert: it did. 

ivy

ive is not a particularly mothering person, not to humans at least. but with you? god she just wants to baby you so much. you're so cute why are you out fighting crime and not sitting on her lap while she plays with your hair??? if shes able to control your mind she absolutely will do that but if not shes just going to flirt with you constantly until you give in. 

Scarecrow

ohh hes going to enjoy scaring such a cute little thing. imagine his disappointment when he finds you don't scare easily. he thought this was going to be like the big bad wolf torturing a little bunny but its more like the other way around. can you stop staring at him with those adorable eyes? you're making him feel ...things. emotions and shit and he’s not happy about it. god hes such a sucker for the puppy dog eyes too.

Riddler

oh you are just ADORABLE! How on earth can he take you seriously when you’re this cute?! he doesn't even have it in his heart to put you in a death trap...well maybe just once, to see if you are as smart as you are cute. he wont let you get hurt, don't worry. its just an excuse for him to watch you get all indignant, he just LOVES the little look on your face when you're mad. 

Harley

harley loves cute things and you are no exception. i think the biggest danger you're in from harley is getting a concussion when she rugby tackles you into a hug and nuzzle or when she kidnaps you to put on her shelf. don't worry, she’ll take very good care of you as long as you let her play dress up. 

there you go winter, took me a while to get round to this one what with the illness and lack of motivation so i hope this is acceptable 

got something you wana talk about? send me an ask or a dm!

[curious-menace]

Rogues bedroom headcanons

yea so i spent all day tidying my pit of a bedroom ( and it still isnt that tidy tbh) so it made me wonder what kind of rooms the rogues have. how would they decorate? big bed or little bed? pillow fort or utilitarian space? i think scarecrow would like my halloween themed room but all the plushies are definitely more harley lol.

Had images but Tumblr ate them. Please use your imagination

Penguin

For the most part penguin sleeps in his office. He normally just sleeps on the couch with the ac turned way up. its easier for him since he’s always working. hes got some decor on the walls like trophies, stuffed animals etc. When he lived at Cobblepot manor his room was pretty extravagant. his parents gave him whatever he wanted to keep him out of their hair . As an adult his room at home is no less luxurious. there are paintings and statues he also has a  four poster king sized bed, but its rarely slept in. Penguins room is cold, not just in temperature. there are little to no personal items. no photos of his family, no childhood toys, no books or ornaments. Its a beautiful room but it feels more like a hotel than somewhere someone might actually live. Nicely decorated but lacking a personal touch.

Twoface

I mentioned in another post that his bed is one of the only areas of his life that doesn't get the clean side / dirty side treatment. harvey and twoface are in agreement that they need somewhere decent to sleep. they still like to have the room half and half so they have their bed in the corner so it doesnt cross the halfway line. everything on the side of the room with the bed is white or gold , neat and tidy .He doesn't go for all the clutter the others have, even on the messy side. none of it is personal except for a few things hidden in the nightstand like his da badge, a few spare coins and a picture of Gilda. he usually has a double or queen sized bed, but its not for sharing. he just likes to spread out.

Poison ivy

i canon ivy as not needing sleep, so she doesnt usually faff about with bedrooms. if she must have one its small, filled with plants and a single bed or comfy sofa so that there's more room for plants. She has a few personal items, maybe some photos or her PHD framed on the wall. its also nicely decorated with rugs, seats and cusions that shes made or bought from small artists and business owners. most of the space, ceiling included is taken up by plants mind you. I cannot emphasize how many plants this woman has in her room.

Riddler

riddler has so much stuff in his room its hard to know where to put it all. he’s got ornaments, books, nicknacks and memorabilia and even some stuff from his various heists over the years ( nothing too incriminating mind you) his walls are covered in art and newspaper clippings and posters with barely an inch uncovered. He spent most of his life renting one of gotham's many sparsely decorated apartments and swore that when he could afford a place of his own, he’d never have bare walls again. He’d probably have a king sized bed but like harvey, its not for sharing. he just wants to treat himself to the things that he was deprived of as a child, spread out as far as he can ( despite the fact he usually sleeps curled up on his side in one corner). i also imagine his room wont be huge. just enough for his stuff, somewhere nice to sit and look out over the city and a big cozy bed. he definitely has one of those fake fireplaces too.

Scarecrow

Scarecrow has all of his bedrooms torn down to bare wall and built up again to look like a log cabin. He just wants seclusion, he wants peace and quiet. even in the middle of a city, he can retreat to his “cabin” for a sanity check. the walls have a few things on them but mostly its sound absorbing foam made to look like wooden walls. Hes got a couple of family heirlooms like fancy lamps and a few hand stitched quilts but its mostly empty space, why cover the beautiful wood work?. of course the majority of the room is taken up by books but generally only his favorites are next to his bed. as much as he wants to read all night he needs to sleep at some point and having too many in arms reach is too big a temptation . he’s pretty tall but sleeping in a double bed feels weird to him so its usually a single with extra pillows and quilts for back and leg support.

Harley quinn

harleys room has too much going on. its not conducive to a good nights sleep. her hideouts have the regular red and black theme, silk sheets and pictures of the joker everywhere but when she had a home it was more quirky with eclectic stuff she found at garage and going out of business sales . looking at her room for too long will give you a headache, its so loud. and not just with all the beaded curtains and the cuckoo alarm clock. she has a queen sized bed that she sleeps in the middle of with bud and lou either side of her. if they aren't with her shes one of those people who is pushed to the edge of her bed by her many many plushies

[curious-menace]

Batman has put on a bit of quarantine weight (he could lose it but he's like fuck it I'm cool with having a muffin top) and his villains take notice how would they all react to slightly softer looking batman bonus if one of villains is like supportive like you look adorable all chubby bats..like a cuddly bat plush.

dad bod batman. 

that is all. 

jk here are some headcanons

Penguin 

well he’s a lil chubby himself so i doubt he’s going to be in a position to throw any stones in this particular glass house. You could argue that batman looks the same since some men look really fat when its actually muscle. think rugby players, professional weight lifters (not body builders thats all for show) and maybe professional boxers? look at albert king in arkham knight. he’s chubby but he’s a brick wall! either way i dont think penguin will be treating him any different. batman can still punch his lights out and now with a bit of extra weight? he’s going to hit like a runaway train. 

TwoFace

Again, he doesnt spend much time looking at batmans ass while he’s running away from him. he might make some jokes about how batman weights if he landed on him for a take down, maybe joke like catwoman about needing a few more notches in his utility belt. To be honest, this whole quarantine isolation thing has him a bit down in the dumps. he’s probably just happy to see another human being, even if it is batman.  

Ivy

Shes teasing but not mean, like selina. shes loving quarantine life. nobody bothers her and she’s free to be with her plants all day long. she’s basically just chilling in the botanic gardens, since its closed due to not being an essential service. when batman shows up to check on her, she notices something is different but doesnt pin point it right away. but when he jumps down from the rafters and makes her glass herb gardens rattle she burst out laughing. again, shes not being mean, she just genuinely finds this hilarious that even the great batman has put on a few pounds in lock down. yes, she is loving the new look, softer around the edges and better for sitting on if he was under mind control

Scarecrow

i mean this in the nicest way possible but scarecrow literally does not give one tiny fuck. he’s gotten so much work done in lockdown without people bothering him, he’s soo deep in his research that he doesn't even notice batman approach. he does freak the fuck out , flinging vials of his new toxin 10 feet in the air in fright when he turns around and batman is standing there. the vials land far enough away that they aren't in any danger. still Stawman is pissed that batman just had to show up right then and scare the piss out of him. but he hasn't seen another human in like 3 months and since his research is ruined, he asks batman to stay for a few minutes. there's nothing technically illegal afoot in his lab right now, so why not see how crane is holding up? he sits in one of scarecrow old chairs that groans like a dying animal under his weight. scarecrow might raise an eyebrow but he’s not going to stay anything, not right now anyway. 

Riddler

oh thank GOD ! another human being! riddler is glad, actually fuckin glad to see batman. he’s been so BORED since lockdown started he actually contemplated kidnapping some people just so he’d have company. i made a joke once that you cant gag any riddler because they’ll just store it up and ramble more later. this is exactly what happens with batman when riddler spots him , he’s speaking so fast the flash would have trouble understanding him “Come in batman, sit down make yourself comfortable, not in that chair that’s a deathtrap ive been working on. have you put on a little weight? nevermind im sure you can work it off in my newest puzzle its very- wait where are you going?!” speaking of bat plushies , riddler absolutely has a batman plush on his desk that he likes to ramble at. when the real bats leaves he makes a mental note to put some more stuffing into plushie batman.

Harley

Harley hugs batman. i guess its ok, she might as well be part of his bubble for all the time they spend together. she notices right away hes put on a few but shes not one  to complain. makes him soft, its a nice change from jokers bones and refusal to give her even a head pat. Batman is a softie at heart, he cant bring himself to push her away. she’s mostly compliments about him looking soft and chubby and invites to stay with her or wont he please please please take her to the batcave shes so bored and she misses the robins, god help her she even misses the other rogues. she also misses going outside but technically a cave isnt outside so shes not breaking any rules and surely there must be enough room to be socially distant in a place that size.  batman disappears for a few hours, seemingly ignoring her request . he returns with plushies of all the rogues and batfam, and a special bat patterned facemask just for her. this earns him another not so socially distant hug with harley possibly not quite copping a feel of his new love handles and plump butt. 

this was very silly but an enjoyable write, thank you for the prompt nonnie! i must admit, im more like scarecrow than harley. i like being inside, but i worry im getting to use to it and if things return to normal (relatively speaking) i wont want to go back out again. 

i suppose that's a problem for future shep right?

got something you wanna talk about? send me an ask or a dm!💜💙💛🧡💚❤️

[curious-menace]

Rogues Starbucks orders

We were meant to grab coffee to go yesterday, but we spent so long in the hospital we didn't have time :(

I wanted to write this while I was sipping my latte but 🤷🏻‍♀️

Anyway here's what the rogues would order from starbucks.

Heads up, I live in the UK so we might have a few region specific drinks that idk if y'all have in America.

Penguin

Wouldn't be caught dead in Starbucks.he hates chain coffee stores with a passion. Their coffee is OK. Just ok. But their tea is swill water to him and that's usually what he drinks. He likes local tea shops that do regional varieties of tea like Belfast brew here or Suki tea across the UK. If he absolutely MUST go to to Starbucks then he likes something simple that's hard to get wrong like English breakfast or earl grey. None of the fancy herbal blends. Usually sends other people to get his drink for him but never gives them enough information to get it right

Twoface

Two face is pretty straightforward with his Starbucks orders. He likes that no matter where in the world he goes, if there's a Starbucks, he can pop in for a cuppa and he knows what he'll be getting and how it tastes. Cutesie one off stores are nice and all but why have you put a perfectly good coffee in the skin of an avocado? Harvey usually just takes a large pikeplace fresh brew but Harv likes things things so full of sugar they can't technically call them coffee like a chocolate marshmallow s'mores frappuccino. Harvey usually orders ahead, in his da days he'd pick his order up on the way to work. Harv however likes to shoot the breeze with the cashier, relax , read the paper and actually take his time to enjoy the drink.

Ivy

Dislikes Starbucks on principal but is still a sucker for their drinks from her PhD days. She's in there all the time but she's not happy about it. Vividly remembers stumbling in to the Otisburg Starbucks in Gotham at 4am the day before her dissertation was due and ordering "as much espresso as you (the barista) can legally give me". Nowadays she usually sticks to the herbal teas and iced teavana blends. She still has an occasional espresso for old times sake.shes always in early so she likes to lounge on the sofas and chat while they open up and brew her a fresh pot of tea

Scarecrow

Spends a lot of time here. Probably passing by ivy as they look at eachother with the kind of dead eyes unique to PhD students/postgrads. for his fabled love of psl he really only likes them when he's in a certain mood. He broke into the Bowery Starbucks and stole a bottle of the syrup so he can make them at home. Jon doesn't have a sweet tooth, he takes his coffee with milk no sugar. Doesn't like espresso but will drink it to keep himself going. His everyday order is a tall blond roast with a splash of full-fat milk and occasionally some extra vanilla flavouring .Hes pretty friendly, all things considered. The Starbucks closest to his hideout has never been robbed, the bariatas save him a table near the back so he can work uninterrupted. Sometimes hell even help the college age bariatas with their work, give them feedback from a professor and so on.

Riddler

COCO! 99% of the time he's in there it's for some sort of hot chocolate: white, peppermint, salted caramel, truffle even a good ol'fashion hazelnut flavoured Coco is good by him. He's not a big coffee drinker, he'd prefer to just be well rested ( yea wouldn't we all, Eddie) but if he is in buying a little pick-me-up he gets a mocha or orders a hot chocolate and espresso separately so he can mix them himself at his leisure. He's got plenty of cash, the bariatas love it when he's in BC he tips well and often buys for the whole line behind him.

Harley

The rumors are true, Harley is the worst person for ordering stuff. Thankfully she's not like the joker, she won't get mad if they don't have what she wants, but she will ask if they can order it in "just for lil old me?" She likes ordering frappuccinos from other countries like the jelly mango, the triple coffee and the pop'zel coffee. she often orders secret menu stuff but every now and then she'll just say "surprise me" and the bariatas can go hog wild. The Gotham Starbucks now offer the "dark night"- an all black coconut milk drink with layers of pinapple and lemon zest on top. The last laugh- an ube drink with strawberry sauce topped with green whipped cream and the madlove- a pink lemonade and blue tea mixed drink .The staff don't mind because she's always boasting about them on Instagram and let's people pet her hyenas.

Woo! That was a long one. It's inspiring me to make some actual batman themed drinks 🤔

Or at the very least, draw them.

Got any questions for me? Send me an ask our HMU with a DM!