Oct 3, 2021
day 2: suit
this band will raise the dead and call it special effects
seen from Yemen
seen from France
seen from United Kingdom
seen from Russia
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from South Africa
seen from United States
seen from China
seen from Russia
seen from United States
seen from Indonesia
seen from China
seen from United States
seen from China
seen from Mexico
seen from United States
seen from Germany
seen from China
seen from Türkiye
day 2: suit
this band will raise the dead and call it special effects
She’s had many names over the years, but something about her presence—that or her sheer audacity—gives her away every time.
In the wake of a devastating apocalypse, a queer millennial finds herself newly immortal. Determined not to succumb to the cynicism of the old gods, she hits the road to go live life to its fullest, becoming legend along the way.
(Eternal thanks to @littlyon as the co-creator of this universe.)
[A coffee pot is found broken]
La Mort: So, who broke it? I’m not mad, I just want to know.
Spencer: I did, I broke it-
La Mort: No. No, you didn’t. Willow?
Willow: Don’t look at me. Look at Scian.
Scian: What? I didn’t break it.
Willow: Hmm. That’s weird. How did you even know it was broken?
Scian: Because it’s sitting right in front of us, and it’s broken.
Willow: Suspicious.
Scian: No, it’s not! If it matters…probably not… Sable was the last one to use it.
Sable: Liar! I don’t even drink that crap.
Scian: Oh, really? Then what were you doing by the coffee cart earlier?
Sable: I use the wooden stirrers to push back my cuticles. Everyone knows that, Scian!
Spencer: Okay, let’s not fight. I broke it, let me pay for it.
La Mort: No. Who broke it?
Sable: Mort, Meghan has been awfully quiet…
Meghan: Really?!
Sable: Yeah, really!
[Cut to La Mort in another room, the rest of them fighting in the background]
La Mort: I broke it. It burned my hand so I destroyed it. I predict ten minutes from now, they’ll be at each other’s throats with warpaint on their faces and a pig head on a stick. Good. It was getting a little chummy around here.
Danse Macabre: Unraveled
Sable: I couldn't give a shit about death.
Scian: But are you happy with just those two versions of yourself? You shouldn't be.
Spencer: It's a bit spooky; it's also super emotionally available.
Willow: Turns out, she's dead!
Siona: Technically not murder, definitely bad!
Olly: Because not even death can excuse you from service in Bowser's army.
Z: No one can turn down a man in uniform. Or a poltergeist in uniform.
Meghan: Surprise! I'm important!
La Dissension: I choose to believe he's pretty nice. But he's also completely on fire.
La Mort: Maybe this new genre will unite all these warring factions - or at least, create a new, really cool warring faction.
L'Ordre: It's very hard to cuddle with someone when there's an inferiority complex between you.
Héloïse: I'm gonna make this timeline much worse.
Things I’ve Written, Entirely Out of Context #14:
“Never worship a god of death. All he does is keep you from a life worth living.” And then she’d pause, and then add, “Also, he’s an asshole.”
“So. A lot of people ask, “how do people know that you’re gay?” And I gotta tell ya: I don’t think it’s the haircut. I don’t think it’s the piercings. I think… It’s the scythe.”
—Sable, probably
Danse Macabre Characters x John Mulaney
Sable: Excuse me, I'm new in town - and it gets worse.
Scian: Hey, would you help me out? I'm very gay. I'd like a few dollars.
Spencer: Some people give off this vibe, immediately, like "Do Not Fuck With Me." My vibe is more like, "Hey, you could pour soup in my lap and I'll probably apologize to you!"
Willow: The kid in Home Alone 2, he gets into a stretch limousine on 5th Avenue with a large cheese pizza, and I thought, "THIS IS THE HEIGHT OF LUXURY!"
Meghan: I don't know. I know you told me, but I have had a very long day. I am very small, and I have no money, so you can imagine the kind of stress that I am under.
Siona: He had a van full of little kids, and he ordered black coffee - the one thing from McDonald's no child could enjoy.
Z: We took off while you were in the bathroom! Because we HATE you!
Aunt Carrie: Someone came out of one of the rooms at this party holding this old antique bottle with some liquid in it and was like, "Hey, is this whiskey or perfume?" And apparently, I grabbed it, drank all of it, and said, "It's perfume."
La Mort: Ohhhh, ze zings I have seen, you cock-sucker. The Gestapo threw my printing press into a river - but go, tell your FUCKING jokes.
L'Ordre: I don't look older, I just look worse, I think. Honestly, when I'm walking down the street, no one's ever like, "Hey, look at that Man!" They're just like, "Whoa, that tall child looks TERRIBLE!"
La Dissension: I used to think, how could a person kill someone? How could someone kill another human being? And then I got cheated on, and I was like, "Oh, oookay."
L'Éternité: No one cared about my opinion when I was a little kid. No one cared what I thought.
Héloïse: We've all gone too big too fast and then run out of room.
OC Valentines from the Author-Creature’s blog.