#sam gets deep

[samssimsarchive]

23

23. If you could send a message to yourself back on the first day of the year, what would it be?

Ooooo, good one. I would say: Times are going to get hard with your new job and new challenges. You are going to feel the most stressed that you’ve ever felt. You will cry the most times than you ever have. But you won’t give up and you will learn so much from all of this. And you will be better for it. It’s worth it.

Thank you for asking! 

Send me an end of the year ask

[sweetsmalldog]

03?

03: Do you regret anything?

Not telling my dad I loved him more

[your-villainous-neighbour]

am I dead

were you ever alive

[westcoastlester]

I wanna fall in love with the stars in your eyes. I wanna fall in love with the cosmos in your touch. But I already fell in love with the universe in your heart.

Things I Wish I Could Say #3

[westcoastlester]

I can’t believe you’re real, because the thought of getting loved back is a fairy tale concept to me. And I think I’m terrified that I might love you.

Things I Wish I Could Say #2

[crppledgaywitchmagic]

I’m constantly changing.

Middle school me was a train wreck.

High school me was an embarrassment.

And I don’t know what college me is, but at least I know where I’ve been.

[bespectacledcolfer]

Know what I hate? Peas. Know what I hate peas in? Fried rice. Just thought I'd share.

[crppledgaywitchmagic]

I'm not a nihilist.

But it's like nihilism is this house. Sometimes, I'm sitting in idealism city and I know that one day people are going to be educated and understand the shit they are doing is wrong and they just need to understand. But other times I go for a walk. I find myself in cynical downtown and I see the nihilism house. The walls are black and the people are drinking. I see nihilism house and I knock on the door. I stick a head in the window. I get a cup of Irish Coffee. And I feel the wave that none of this will ever matter. We will die someday and most likely we won't matter. And the system is far too big to ever be changed by the enlightened few, who if we are being honest, are still learning. And if we are still learning what the fuck is the world doing. If we are hateful and do harmful things and we have been educated we are being educated. How the hell can we think that one day the world will be too? Especially, in a world where corporations strong arm the media and keep everyone in this sheep state. And even if we do manage to educated everyone we'll have to wait until all of the last generation is extinct to get any real change. And by then we will be the antiques who don't understand what's really going on with the world. So, we just get up, play the game that is put in front of us, and eventually die. And sometimes I just sit there on the porch of the house of nihilism and I want to go in. I see the world's shit and just want to enter. But I never do and finish my coffee and take the nearest bus out of cynical downtown and pretend I still belong in idealism city.  Even if I can feel my membership card heavy in my pocket and the dust of cigarette ash under my fingernails. My face still smiles and I move on.