Hi, do you think that Harry's personality was altered to fit with Ginny's in HBP? I can put my money on the fact that the Harry Potter from OotP would not put up with any of Ginny's bullshit. He wouldn't even talk to her if he could help it let alone date her.
If jkr wasn't on her trojan horse to make hinny endgame, Harry probably would not date anybody in sixth year. Not with Sirius's death, voldemort's horcruxes, his disastrous relationship (really, it's a stretch) with Cho the previous year and his new found obsession with Malfoy. His brain could only hold so much.
Hi, like, Harry's personality definitely changed in HBP, but I don't think Ginny was the only reason (Ginny's personality also changed from OotP, for the worse if you ask me). Harry's personality change between OotP and HBP isn't all that bad. Last time I read the book, a lot of it can be explained by his trauma response (his sass and even less self-preservation than before).
What is a little odd about HBP Harry is that he is way calmer than OotP Harry and tries harder not to annoy Ginny, even early in the book, before he supposedly realises his crush. Which is in stark contrast to Harry with anybody else and in any other book. Harry isn't scared of calling out people for bad behaviour, even people he likes (Lupin, Ron, Hermione, etc.), and who is outright rude to Ginny late in OotP. Basically, the transitions in Harry's opinions and behaviour towards Ginny didn't change naturally and go against how he usually reacts to people. Because you're right that OotP Harry would not try to appease Ginny when she gets all worked up over Fluer, he wouldn't care what she thought, and we don't see the summer between OotP and HBP when he supposedly changed his whole treatment of Ginny — which is a problem.
As for whether he'd date at all after Sirius' death... it can go both ways. I actually think it's very possible Harry throws himself into a relationship with Ginny — who he sees as a normal and safe dating option, she represents normal teenage life, and not being the Boy Who Lived — because of his trauma and Sirius' death and everything going on with Voldemort.
I mean, we are told pretty explicitly he sees his time with Ginny as a break of normalcy from his eventful life. It's a distraction and a coping mechanism:
“It’s been like . . . like something out of someone else’s life, these last few weeks with you,” said Harry. “But I can’t . . . we can’t . . . I’ve got things to do alone now.”
So, I don't think that's inherently out of character, actually. What is, is Harry thinking he loves Ginny as much as he does, without knowing her and being chill with a lot of her behaviour he would have called her out for before:
“She’s a damn sight nicer than Phlegm,’’ said Ginny
“And she’s more intelligent, she’s an Auror!” said Hermione from
the corner.
“Fleur’s not stupid, she was good enough to enter the Triwizard
Tournament,” said Harry.
“Not you as well!” said Hermione bitterly.
“I suppose you like the way Phlegm says ‘ ’Arry,’ do you?” asked
Ginny scornfully.
“No,” said Harry, wishing he hadn’t spoken, “I was just saying,
Phlegm — I mean, Fleur —”
[...]
“I wouldn’t go in the kitchen just now,” she warned him.
“There’s a lot of Phlegm around.”
“I’ll be careful not to slip in it.” Harry smiled
First, Hermione and Ginny should lay off Fleur. Second, how come Harry finds Ginny's comments about Fleur funny after he just spoke in Fleur's defence? Why is he regretting having talked? He doesn't regret it when he speaks up to defend people he cares about or to say what people need to hear when it's the truth, even in HBP and DH. Ginny is the only exception, and we don't see what made her that exception in the books. Especially when Harry repeatedly shows he cares for Ron and Hermione more than her.
“And Ginny, don’t call Ron a prat, you’re not the Captain of this team —”
“Well, you seemed too busy to call him a prat and I thought someone should —”
Harry forced himself not to laugh.
You're telling me Harry would find this behaviour funny, JKR? He would if he didn't like Ron, sure, but Ron is one of his most important people, more important to him than Ginny (as proven time and time again in DH), and he knows Ron's insecure enough as is. Harry would not stand for the Ron slander, even if it's from his sister.
Harry looked over at Ron, who was hunched in a corner, staring at his knees, a bottle of butterbeer clutched in his hand.
“Angelina still won’t let him resign,” Ginny said, as though reading Harry’s mind. “She says she knows he’s got it in him.”
Harry liked Angelina for the faith she was showing in Ron, but at the same time thought it would really be kinder to let him leave the team.
(OotP, Ch26) - Harry likes when people show faith in Ron's abilities! Wild that he's a good friend!
For context, Harry to Ginny in OotP when he's stressed over Sirius and annoyed with her:
“Hi,” said Ginny uncertainly. “We recognized Harry’s voice — what are you yelling about?”
“Never you mind,” said Harry roughly.
Ginny raised her eyebrows.
“There’s no need to take that tone with me,” she said coolly. “I was only wondering whether I could help.”
“Well, you can’t,” said Harry shortly.
But I wouldn't say Harry won't talk to her if he could help it. He likes Ginny in OotP but not more than Fred and George. He finds some of her comments amusing and thinks she's alright. He doesn't hate her, far from it — but he doesn't see her as a romantic interest, he sees her as Ron's little sister. He's actively surprised she has any interest or talent in Quidditch and finds it unlikely. OotP Harry doesn't think very highly of Ginny, nor is he super interested in her as a person:
“You and Fred and George,” she said impatiently. “We’ve got an- other Seeker!”
“Who?” said Harry quickly.
“Ginny Weasley,” said Katie.
Harry gaped at her.
“Yeah, I know,” said Angelina, pulling out her wand and flexing her arm. “But she’s pretty good, actually. Nothing on you, of course,” she said, throwing him a very dirty look
“Well, that was a bit stupid of you,” said Ginny angrily, “seeing as you don’t know anyone but me who’s been possessed by You-Know-Who, and I can tell you how it feels.”
Harry remained quite still as the impact of these words hit him. Then he turned on the spot to face her.
“I forgot,” he said.
“Lucky you,” said Ginny coolly.
“I’m sorry,” Harry said, and he meant it. “So . . . so do you think I’m being possessed, then?”
And even the "best" hinny scene in OotP in the library (in quotations because that scene is really weird), Harry isn't really telling Ginny what's bothering him. He tells her he wants to talk to Sirius, but not why (Which is his doubts about James and what he saw in Snape's worst memory. He doesn't tell Ron and Hermione about it either, but it is an example of him not being more open with her than with Ron and Hermione. He isn't).
It's not all out of character in HBP, and Harry could get to a point where he treats Ginny and her comments the way he does, there's just nothing that happens in the books that justifies it — hence why it's so jarring. We didn't see Harry's emotions evolve to this point; they just sorta appear, and are really weird when they are there (god, I hate the chest monster).
