what do I do with that?
A/N: So I was listening to the song 'Ti Na To Kano' by Konstantinos Argiros and the idea for this dialogue popped into my head. Gilbert's little speech is pretty much the lyrics paraphrased in English. This is basically 500 words of an angsty conversation between Anne and Gilbert in an AU in which the Cuthberts and Blythes have been feuding for generations (think a romeo and juliet type deal). For now, I kind of just wanna leave this as flash fiction, but if people like it perhaps I can develop it into a full fic. Also, even if you don't understand Greek I still recommend the song because you can really just feel the emotion in his voice.
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"Please, Anne, I have no family left to disappoint, and I'm willing to do whatever it takes to be accepted by yours. I'll forsake my name if I must. But, please, marry me?" He knows what her answer will be before she opens her mouth, but he still dares to hope, so he desperatley clutched her hands in his own as he balanced on one knee.
"Oh Gilbert, you know that I would if I could. You know I love you, perhaps in another life…" Yes, he was fully aware what he was getting himself into when he fell for a Cuthbert, but it still stung.
"What am I meant to do with that? You kiss me in secret, and I feel as if I am on fire! In my dreams, I chase after you only to lose you when I catch you. I want to have you in this life, to put your needs before my own! I wish to be able to see you whenever I desire. I love you, and I know you love me, but what do I do with that? You say that you cannot be with me, that it's forbidden for me to want anything more than these clandestine meetings. My heart beats only for you, so please tell me what to do with that!"
He was well aware of the tears streaming down his face, but he couldn't bring himself to be embarrassed. Instead, he searched her eyes for some sign of softness, any indication that his words had gotten through to her. Instead, she composed herself and fixed him with a stare that was all Cuthbert.
"You deal with it. You know how much I owe Matthew and Marilla. They adopted me, and in doing so saved my life! And you want me to repay them by asking them to accept you, a member of the bloodline their family has been feuding with for generations? If you understood how fortunate you were to be born into a family who loved you, you would not be so quick to forsake them!" She pulled him into a standing position as she spoke, so that they were only inches apart. Typically her proximity would make him melt, but right now it only angered him.
"My entire family is dead! But, despite this, I'd still like to believe they care more for my happiness than they do any petty feud! If the Cuthberts truly loved you, they'd feel the same!" She jerked away from him as if she had been struck.
"How dare you, Gilbert Blythe! Now I can tell you clearly what you should do: leave!" Anne was fully crying now as well, but she emphasized her words by pointing to the door of the barn.
"Gladly." With that, he picked up his lantern and marched off into the night, a she gazed after him and wondered if she'd just made a horrible mistake.
