#sillysallyspeaks

[externalacousticmeatus]

the never ending question of am i having a gender crisis or do i just really hate myself?

[externalacousticmeatus]

more carrie rants from my notes app

evening prayers:

the beginning has the exact same melody as the beginning of i remember how those boys could dance, and a lot of the song is also very musically similar. this could be to show how margret changes throughout the show. obviously she’s a terrible mother, but she seems to feel slightly sorry for her actions in this song. vs i remember how those boys could dance. where she’s rlly starting to lose it and become more angry, fed up with the life that she’s been given. 

opening lines are directly lifted from the book when they’re describing a poem carrie write in third grade. not important, but i thought that was cute :) 

they sing “we have no one except eachother” which relates to the song in act two ‘when there’s no one’. Then carrie leaves, and she’s all alone. 

later in the song, they both sing “you’re the reason i’m alive”  Margaret believes that her purpose in the world as a woman is to bear children, and literally, carrie would not be alive without her. 

i remember how those boys could dance:

it starts off with carrie’s title song, but then it transitions into something dark and threatening, interrupting carrie’s daydreams of a better life and snapping her back to reality. 

hail alma mater / open your heart??

no idea why they have the same melody, maybe to showcase the contrast between carrie’s home life and school life 

[externalacousticmeatus]

overanalyzing the destruction from carrie the musical (including the rlly rlly obvious parts) because i can:

okay so the beginning starts off with her saying the beginning of the lord’s prayer. we also see her saying the lord’s prayer during the opening number, after gym class. Carrie is very religious, and it makes sense why she would be thinking of god during her most traumatic moments. 

then she says “oh my god oh my god oh my god”, using the lords name in vain, something she doesn’t do very often during the show. 

after this she sings “i will not cry, i’m okay, i tried so hard to play their way” which is a callback to the song Carrie, which she sings these exact lyrics. obviously this time she’s far more angry, instead of desperate and calm like in the first use of this. 

things really get interesting when she cries out “mama, you should have told me!” in the original run of the show, there was a song called “her mother should have told her” which takes place during the locker room scene after carrie has gotten her first period. That song is about how carrie’s mother never taught her about menstration, but in this context the line is specifically carrie resenting her mother for not warning her about the cruelty of her peers. The thing is though, she did. She warns carrie several times throughout the show, and so i think this line is about carrie regretting the fact that she ignored her warnings. 

then “and god made eve to bear the curse the curse of blood”, which is a line from ‘and eve was weak’. This line has a lot of complexities, because it’s carrie’s first period that technically triggers her telekinesis, and her denial and acceptance of her own womanhood is what she grapples with throughout the show. And i think the fact that she’s singing this while literally covered in blood is really powerful. 

after this she says “his name is tommy ross mama, he’ll have me home by midnight”, which is her recounting the events that led to this moment at the prom. she’s still processing the event, and desperately going through memories, trying to piece together why this possibly could have happened. 

next, she sings “an eagles just another bird until he can spread his wings”, which is a lyric from tommy’s song ‘dreamer in disguise’ earlier in the show. this part has so many layers oh my god. That song is about feeling different, and it’s what ultimately brings Tommy and Carrie together. I think this specific choice out of all the lyrics in the song is really interesting, because it’s a really powerful metaphor for Carrie and her powers, and it foreshadows what’s about to happen in about 30 seconds. “an eagles just another bird” is about how carrie is very ordinary. she’s definitely an outsider, but she is ultimately just like everyone else. she’s mostly ignored, and when she is bullied it’s often excused because “it’s just carrie”. then, “until he can spread his wings” is about carrie using her powers later on in the scene to finally get revenge on everyone who mocked her, making them finally see her. Specifically, the use of tommy’s song in this moment is powerful because carrie thinks that tommy has betrayed her. she doesn’t understand that he had nothing to do with it, she thought he was in on the trick and THATS why he asked her to the prom. and she never finds out the truth, because she kills him before she gets the chance. and she dies assuming that she has been betrayed.

Then, the ensemble sings “open your hearts, let jesus sing”, which is from the song ‘open your heart’ which is a song on the evangelical christian radio station that her mother is listening to earlier in the show. This time, the lyric is far more dark and sinister. Religion has had such a big impact on carrie’s life and worldview (mostly for the worst) and at this point in the show (id argue it’s a little more obvious in the book), her powers are inherently biblical. wether they’re sent from heaven or hell is unknown, but they’re definitely not something human. 

After this are lyrics from ‘i remember how those boys could dance’, but this time they’re sung by Carrie instead of her mother. “they’ll make fun of you, they will break your heart, then they’ll laugh at you watching you fall apart.” and her peers do all of those things. Even though Margaret is an absolutely terrible person and mother, the sad thing is, she was right in the end. And carrie realizes that. Just like earlier in The Destruction, Carrie is trying to grapple the fact that she was told these things and chose to ignore the warnings. 

During this line, the ensemble sings “carrieeee carrieee” in almost a sinister mocking tone, the same tone they’ve used on her so many times. This time, though, they’re chanting her real name. compared to the title song, when Carrie is frustrated because no one knows her name. They finally know who she is, but at what cost?

Then, she sings more lyrics from the title song. “doesn’t anybody ever get it right? doesn’t anybody think that i hear?” i get chills every time i get to this part of the song. there’s something so powerful about her belting out these same two lines again, but so much different this time. in the title song, she’s tired of being mocked  and is desperate to fit in. this time around, she’s desperate to get her revenge. 

The rest do the song is instrumental, but there’s still so much to analyze. it depends on the production, but at least in the cast recording we first hear the sounds of various electronics short circuiting, and the fire alarm going off. in the book, one of the main way that carrie kills people is by setting off the sprinkler system in the school gym, and electrocuting everyone inside. We can also hear a heart beating, probably Carrie’s. later on in the show, Carrie kills her mother by slowing down her heart rate.

Next, we hear an electric guitar rendition of ‘i remember how those boys could dance’. As we hear the screams of carrie’s dying classmates, it transitions into the title song, then back to ‘i remember how those boys could dance’, but this time as a haunting piano melody. 

[externalacousticmeatus]

i have paragraphs and paragraphs of rants about carrie sitting in my notes app and i was going to edit them then post them but i dont have the energy to edit them should i just post them in their current state

what do i do

post them now

edit them then post eventually

let them sit in notes app hell forever

Voting ended onSep 27, 2024

[externalacousticmeatus]

never thought i’d be using pregnancy as a metaphor for quadratic recursive equations but here we are

[externalacousticmeatus]

as a jew i never know how to respond when people come up to me and tell me that jesus loves me. like thank you? i think? idk how im supposed to react 😭

[externalacousticmeatus]

being an actor and techie is rlly fun because even when you aren’t doing tech for a show, you still kind of are? like that’s how i ended up doing peoples into mics in a nun costume, getting fresh batteries in the middle of a scene, and giving people mic tape when i’m not on stage

[externalacousticmeatus]

"i'm so normal" (makes a 54 slide powerpoint to keep track of my blocking)